Dear Speed Seduction® Student,
Only one thing pleases me more to hear that a student is kicking ass and taking names.
What could please me more than that, you ask?
No, not the entire UCLA Women's Volleyball team suddenly deciding that hugging me nasty in the dark is an obsession they HAVE to fulfill (Although I do love the UCLA Women's Volleyball team!)
No, what pleases me most is hearing that a student is actually helping out a fellow student to get amazing results.
Look: when I think back to what an incredibly tongue-tied, nerve-wracked, chicken-chokin' loser I used to be with women, it makes me want to cry.
So, when a student gets marvelous results, and then helps another student achieve the same, well, I'm about as proud as a hillbilly daddy in a roomful of virgin 13 year olds!
So, imagine my good feelings when I got the following email:
Hi Ross,
I thought the story of what happened last night might be interesting for Some of you - especially the newer SS students.
After the London seminar the Irish lads decided that we should get together and start to really push these skills forward.
After a number of bars we were all off the mark and had already got some great responses. Things were off to a great start - the guys had gone from not being able to open, to using blurt-outs, intuitive openers, humorous approaches, and some great sincerity, which we learned from the Gold Walk Ups DVD http://www.speedseduction.net/products/rj185.asp
The more women that were opened, the further the old beliefs faded. THE WOMEN LOVED THESE CHARMING GUYS.
I helped one student, Dan, with some of the exercises on your Fear Into Charisma DVD
http://www.speedseduction.net/products/rj180.asp
Here is the REALLY INTERESTING THING - he got some great smiles, some kino from these women, and out of about 50 approached women, only 2 semi negative responses. The energy was grounded before going out, and his state, energy, and awareness were totally controlled and supercharged.
After this, women were approaching him, and there was no more fear of approaches - he hit the100 openers mark by the end of the night.
Then came Selig.
This guy was amazing, he really got into the ritual before hand, and we reversed some of the energy surrounding his former fear of clubs when we arrived at the place.
After a little while Selig had hit 60 approaches. At this stage there was no stopping him.
Selig had moved from being afraid to speak to women, to a guy who was magnetic, charming, intuitive, and dynamic in a little under 5 hours. He broke the 100 approaches mark by the end of the night.
I'm sure the guys will have their own stories to post in more detail, but suffice to say, approaches are no longer a problem.
John Stein - Cork, Ireland
John, what can I say? A huge "right on" for helping out
your fellow Speed Seduction ® students. May you always find women with warm hearts, firm bods, and lots of moist relief!
Peace and piece,
RJ
P.S. Want to overcome YOUR fear of approaching women and know the 4 different ways to meet them anytime, anywhere, and never worry about what to say? Then check out:
http://www.speedseduction.net/products/rj180.asp
and
http://www.speedseduction.net/products/rj185.asp
And let me know when you top meeting 100 women a night!
This newsletter, and all of its contents are
copyright 2004, Ross Jeffries. However this
newsletter may be reprinted and re-used in
any format, without prior consent, provided
all content, including all links, are kept
intact, proper credit for authorship is given,
and the newsletter is given for free,
without charge.
Showing posts with label sensual romantic tip. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sensual romantic tip. Show all posts
Friday, March 18, 2011
Friday, January 14, 2011
Three Students Share Shocking Seduction Success!
Dear Speed Seduction® Student,
One of the great joys of doing this job is getting the
emails and testimonials from guys just like you who are using
my material to really turn their love lives around and
transform their success with women.
Now, the best ones are from students who are really just
trying things out for the first time, and interestingly
enough, even though they've read the newsletters, understood
the courses and material the first few times they try this
stuff ……
.........They Don't Even Believe It's Going To Work!
No, that wasn't a misprint or a typo. I said they don't
(as in do NOT) believe this stuff is going to work!
In fact, I have seen from my experience, time and time
again, when guys first try this stuff, they usually DON'T
believe in it precisely because it IS so different from the
way 99% of most guys have been taught to think, feel and act
around women.
A Key Understanding If You REALLY Want To Change!
You see, there is a huge paradox in creating real, massive
change, in any area of your life. Once you get this key
understanding, you will be on your way to massive success at
changing virtually anything (and not just with women), no
matter what system or method you might try. So pay attention,
and get this, because here it is it is:
The Methods For Success That Are Closest To What You Are
Already Doing Seem The Easiest To Try, But Offer the Least
Potential For Huge Change , Because They Are So Close To What
You Are Already Thinking, Acting, Believing And Doing!
What this comes down to, is the whole idea of "the comfort
zone". When you stay in your "comfort zone" and just do what
you are used to, it is pretty easy, yet doing what you are
used to (and thinking and believing as you have been used to)
is what has been keeping you stuck.
Thinking, believing and acting very differently can bring
you rapid and massive results, but it CAN at first feel
uncomfortable unless you have some special "technology" to get
you around that "difference".
Anyway, being able to try out brand new ways of doing
things, and to do so with a sense of enjoyment, exploration
and fun, instead of anxiety and fear, is one of the unique
technological breakthroughs that Speed Seduction® brings to
you, in addition to the actual material for meeting and
rapidly turning on women!
SS is the only system that has been offering these tested,
proven tools for self-transformation to men for the past
decade, and I am very proud of that!
So, that out of the way, let me share 2 recent emails from
you, from some happy and successful NEW students:
Ye Gods!
I have to share this with somebody, and I'm afraid you
guys are going to have to take the brunt of it...
I went out tonight on a field trip. I'd spent most [nay,
all...] of my free time over the last few weeks burying
myself in the Basic SS CDs & literature. I'm not ashamed to
admit that I've pranced around my apartment daily, like an
idiot, rehearsing patterns and "Doing the affirmations."
I went out tonight, met some friends in a noisy pub [not
the ideal environment, for sure...], but with the
single-minded determination to try this stuff out for real.
Cutting to the chase: I saw a slim, blonde HB surrounded
by drooling buffoons. Throwing caution to the wind [have you
ever tried doing that?], I dived on in. I caught her eye,
smiled, opened with a bit of low-key banter and she said:
"I am from Germany. My English, it's not very good..."
She was a foreign exchange student who'd only been in the
country for a few weeks.
Needless to say, my initial though was: "Jesus Christ on a
Pogo-Stick! Destiny has truly tied my shoelaces together!" But
within seconds I thought: "Fuggit - let's try this shit out,
anyhow..."
So I ran a variation of the Instantaneous Connection
pattern on her. I riffed in some embedded commands. And I
did it all very, very, very slowly. In that terrible mixed-up
syntax that English-speaking people invariably use when
talking to people from other countries. And you know what?
It worked an absolute treat!
We somehow ended up talking about German expletives.
After a few rubbishy attempts at getting my tongue around
[ahem!] the German equivalent of 'Son of a bitch' we moved
onto more fruity translations.
Let's just say, without prompting, she told me what the
German word for "c*nt" is - she made it clear that this wasn't
the 'biological' term, but the taboo variant. And she was
really determined that I got the pronunciation right...
Last orrders arrived, and -without so much as a hint of
supplication -I [slowly, with bad syntax] explained to her
that it was a tragic, shame that our conversation had to end,
and that it was an awful, awful shame that we can't go on
learning new things about each other's language. She reached
into her handbag, pulled out her mobile [cellphone] and
demanded that we exchange numbers...
I'm still in a state of shock. I can't get my hat on.
Must run! I urgently need to check out some
German-English translation sites...
Tomas G, City and state withheld, by request
Dear SS List Brothers,
Just wanted to say hi to everybody on the list & look
forward to a long and learning relationship,
I am new to this and have been applying the Twin Brothers
pattern Ross told us to try after the UK SS seminar this
September 2004,
The other day I used this pattern on a sexy Italian
manageress of a restaurant I had talked to her on a couple of
occasions before this evening, anyway while I was 1/2 way
through I couldn't believe her response, she chose the kisser
rather than someone who makes her laugh & then held my hand
and started to talk about how she felt during sex. I almost
fell of my chair, my colleague couldn't believe it either,
(he's coming to the next seminar) I left it there because I
was punch drunk with the response & delighted that it worked.
I have seen her again and have her number I will let you
know how I get on.
THANKS ROSS
Tim Cooke
London, England
Thanks Tomas and Tim!
Now, do you notice what each of these guys have in common?
Very simple: they had the balls to try something new and
different, without even being sure of the result.
They got the results, by stepping out of their comfort
zone!
So how about you, dear reader? How about you?
Til next time,
Peace and Piece,
Ross
P.S. Get results like these guys and better by getting
your Speed Seduction® Home Study course at:
http://www.speedseduction.net/products/rj87.asp
This newsletter, and all of its contents are
copyright 2004, Ross Jeffries. However this
newsletter may be reprinted and re-used in
any format, without prior consent, provided
all content, including all links, are kept
intact, proper credit for authorship is given,
and the newsletter is given for free,
without charge.
One of the great joys of doing this job is getting the
emails and testimonials from guys just like you who are using
my material to really turn their love lives around and
transform their success with women.
Now, the best ones are from students who are really just
trying things out for the first time, and interestingly
enough, even though they've read the newsletters, understood
the courses and material the first few times they try this
stuff ……
.........They Don't Even Believe It's Going To Work!
No, that wasn't a misprint or a typo. I said they don't
(as in do NOT) believe this stuff is going to work!
In fact, I have seen from my experience, time and time
again, when guys first try this stuff, they usually DON'T
believe in it precisely because it IS so different from the
way 99% of most guys have been taught to think, feel and act
around women.
A Key Understanding If You REALLY Want To Change!
You see, there is a huge paradox in creating real, massive
change, in any area of your life. Once you get this key
understanding, you will be on your way to massive success at
changing virtually anything (and not just with women), no
matter what system or method you might try. So pay attention,
and get this, because here it is it is:
The Methods For Success That Are Closest To What You Are
Already Doing Seem The Easiest To Try, But Offer the Least
Potential For Huge Change , Because They Are So Close To What
You Are Already Thinking, Acting, Believing And Doing!
What this comes down to, is the whole idea of "the comfort
zone". When you stay in your "comfort zone" and just do what
you are used to, it is pretty easy, yet doing what you are
used to (and thinking and believing as you have been used to)
is what has been keeping you stuck.
Thinking, believing and acting very differently can bring
you rapid and massive results, but it CAN at first feel
uncomfortable unless you have some special "technology" to get
you around that "difference".
Anyway, being able to try out brand new ways of doing
things, and to do so with a sense of enjoyment, exploration
and fun, instead of anxiety and fear, is one of the unique
technological breakthroughs that Speed Seduction® brings to
you, in addition to the actual material for meeting and
rapidly turning on women!
SS is the only system that has been offering these tested,
proven tools for self-transformation to men for the past
decade, and I am very proud of that!
So, that out of the way, let me share 2 recent emails from
you, from some happy and successful NEW students:
Ye Gods!
I have to share this with somebody, and I'm afraid you
guys are going to have to take the brunt of it...
I went out tonight on a field trip. I'd spent most [nay,
all...] of my free time over the last few weeks burying
myself in the Basic SS CDs & literature. I'm not ashamed to
admit that I've pranced around my apartment daily, like an
idiot, rehearsing patterns and "Doing the affirmations."
I went out tonight, met some friends in a noisy pub [not
the ideal environment, for sure...], but with the
single-minded determination to try this stuff out for real.
Cutting to the chase: I saw a slim, blonde HB surrounded
by drooling buffoons. Throwing caution to the wind [have you
ever tried doing that?], I dived on in. I caught her eye,
smiled, opened with a bit of low-key banter and she said:
"I am from Germany. My English, it's not very good..."
She was a foreign exchange student who'd only been in the
country for a few weeks.
Needless to say, my initial though was: "Jesus Christ on a
Pogo-Stick! Destiny has truly tied my shoelaces together!" But
within seconds I thought: "Fuggit - let's try this shit out,
anyhow..."
So I ran a variation of the Instantaneous Connection
pattern on her. I riffed in some embedded commands. And I
did it all very, very, very slowly. In that terrible mixed-up
syntax that English-speaking people invariably use when
talking to people from other countries. And you know what?
It worked an absolute treat!
We somehow ended up talking about German expletives.
After a few rubbishy attempts at getting my tongue around
[ahem!] the German equivalent of 'Son of a bitch' we moved
onto more fruity translations.
Let's just say, without prompting, she told me what the
German word for "c*nt" is - she made it clear that this wasn't
the 'biological' term, but the taboo variant. And she was
really determined that I got the pronunciation right...
Last orrders arrived, and -without so much as a hint of
supplication -I [slowly, with bad syntax] explained to her
that it was a tragic, shame that our conversation had to end,
and that it was an awful, awful shame that we can't go on
learning new things about each other's language. She reached
into her handbag, pulled out her mobile [cellphone] and
demanded that we exchange numbers...
I'm still in a state of shock. I can't get my hat on.
Must run! I urgently need to check out some
German-English translation sites...
Tomas G, City and state withheld, by request
Dear SS List Brothers,
Just wanted to say hi to everybody on the list & look
forward to a long and learning relationship,
I am new to this and have been applying the Twin Brothers
pattern Ross told us to try after the UK SS seminar this
September 2004,
The other day I used this pattern on a sexy Italian
manageress of a restaurant I had talked to her on a couple of
occasions before this evening, anyway while I was 1/2 way
through I couldn't believe her response, she chose the kisser
rather than someone who makes her laugh & then held my hand
and started to talk about how she felt during sex. I almost
fell of my chair, my colleague couldn't believe it either,
(he's coming to the next seminar) I left it there because I
was punch drunk with the response & delighted that it worked.
I have seen her again and have her number I will let you
know how I get on.
THANKS ROSS
Tim Cooke
London, England
Thanks Tomas and Tim!
Now, do you notice what each of these guys have in common?
Very simple: they had the balls to try something new and
different, without even being sure of the result.
They got the results, by stepping out of their comfort
zone!
So how about you, dear reader? How about you?
Til next time,
Peace and Piece,
Ross
P.S. Get results like these guys and better by getting
your Speed Seduction® Home Study course at:
http://www.speedseduction.net/products/rj87.asp
This newsletter, and all of its contents are
copyright 2004, Ross Jeffries. However this
newsletter may be reprinted and re-used in
any format, without prior consent, provided
all content, including all links, are kept
intact, proper credit for authorship is given,
and the newsletter is given for free,
without charge.
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
7 Tips To Supercharge Your Speed Seduction® Success!
Dear Speed Seduction® Student,
Part of learning any new technology is understanding some
basic principles. So here are some tips that I have found have
helped many clients with the initial Speed Seduction learning
curve. Remember, a huge part of Speed Seduction is learning to
use your language to...
Capture and Lead A Woman's Imagination and Emotions!
As I have taught again and again, whatever you can get a
person to imagine will be perceived by them to be their own
thought, and thus will not be resisted. Women especially like to
be led by their imagination and emotions! Then, and only then,
will they give you the behaviors (love, sex, etc) that you crave
and want. Remember, women want good feelings, and all of the
tools and language patterns in the Speed Seduction Home Study
course are geared toward either doing this or gathering the
information you need to do this.
Tip 1: The patterns are examples, NOT rules. Many students
think that unless they present the patterns to women, word for
word, that they won't work or get results. THIS IS JUST 100%
FALSE! The patterns are only examples..very GOOD examples..of
the kinds of communication that turn women on. They give you the
structure. But they aren't meant to be rigidly or exclusively
followed. Learn from them HOW they work, and you'll be able to
quickly create your own patterns.
Tip 2: Women enjoy the patterns, so forget about being
caught. So many beginning clients feel like they are doing
something wrong...a small minor crime like picking a pocket or
stealing a wrist-watch when they approach women to do the
patterns! Hey..the patterns are designed to make women feel
wonderful! At the very least you are brightening her day and
doing her a favor and at best turning her on unlike anyone else
ever has! So far from feeling bad, you ought to excited about
the gift you are giving her!
Tip 3: Practice the patterns out loud! The patterns are meant
to be SPOKEN, not read! You can't really master the tonality and
tempo unless you practice OUT LOUD! THIS STEP IS CRITICAL!
Tip 4: Take a little bit each day! Speed Seduction is like
learning a whole new language and a whole new way of thinking!
Be fair to yourself and master it all naturally as it comes!
Take your time and just do a little bit every day! You'll be
shocked at how much you master in just a few weeks time!
Tip 5: Pattern Flow Is Important! One of the most crucial
skills is knowing how to transition from one pattern to another!
In one letter, I explained how to make flash cards to quickly
learn how to flow from one pattern to the next! If you haven't
done that...DO IT NOW!
Tip 6: Understand The Conversational Set-ups! Patterns are
hard to use if you don't know how to introduce them and bring
them up in conversation! For each pattern you want to use you
ought to have at least two ways of bringing it up! I cover this
in several of the Newsletters, so if you haven't got them, all
the back issues are in the back of the workbook in the
Basic/Delux Home Study Course.
Tip 7: Practice Your Closing! So many guys have told me
they've run patterns but when it comes time to closing the
deal..they are stuck! Well, as I have said, if you want a
result, you've got to rehearse it! So prepare your closes in
advance so they flow from you naturally and without thought when
you need them! Along those lines, here are some EXCELLENT
closes:
Close #1: Why don't we continue this somewhere else and see
how much we can enjoy each others company?
Close #2: It's too bad you're not the type of person who can
imagine being together, feeling and doing all the things you
love to feel and do..for all the reasons that make sense to
you..but as you think about it just like that..doesn't it just
seem that spending some time together is something we have to
do?
Close #3: So..what steps would we have to take in order to
make sure we can talk again?
Close #4: I have an intuition..and I don't know if you can
imagine this as I describe it..that when we get a chance to talk
without time pressures or interruptions...we'll really enjoy
each others company..and I'm wondering if there's a number
where you feel comfortable having me call you.
Piece and Peace
Ross
P.S You can get your Speed Seduction® Home Study Course at:
http://www.speedseduction.net/products/rj87.asp
This newsletter, and all of its contents are copyright Ross Jeffries. However this newsletter may be reprinted and re-used in any format, without prior consent, provided all content, including all links, are kept intact, proper credit for authorship is given, and the newsletter is given for free, without charge.
Part of learning any new technology is understanding some
basic principles. So here are some tips that I have found have
helped many clients with the initial Speed Seduction learning
curve. Remember, a huge part of Speed Seduction is learning to
use your language to...
Capture and Lead A Woman's Imagination and Emotions!
As I have taught again and again, whatever you can get a
person to imagine will be perceived by them to be their own
thought, and thus will not be resisted. Women especially like to
be led by their imagination and emotions! Then, and only then,
will they give you the behaviors (love, sex, etc) that you crave
and want. Remember, women want good feelings, and all of the
tools and language patterns in the Speed Seduction Home Study
course are geared toward either doing this or gathering the
information you need to do this.
Tip 1: The patterns are examples, NOT rules. Many students
think that unless they present the patterns to women, word for
word, that they won't work or get results. THIS IS JUST 100%
FALSE! The patterns are only examples..very GOOD examples..of
the kinds of communication that turn women on. They give you the
structure. But they aren't meant to be rigidly or exclusively
followed. Learn from them HOW they work, and you'll be able to
quickly create your own patterns.
Tip 2: Women enjoy the patterns, so forget about being
caught. So many beginning clients feel like they are doing
something wrong...a small minor crime like picking a pocket or
stealing a wrist-watch when they approach women to do the
patterns! Hey..the patterns are designed to make women feel
wonderful! At the very least you are brightening her day and
doing her a favor and at best turning her on unlike anyone else
ever has! So far from feeling bad, you ought to excited about
the gift you are giving her!
Tip 3: Practice the patterns out loud! The patterns are meant
to be SPOKEN, not read! You can't really master the tonality and
tempo unless you practice OUT LOUD! THIS STEP IS CRITICAL!
Tip 4: Take a little bit each day! Speed Seduction is like
learning a whole new language and a whole new way of thinking!
Be fair to yourself and master it all naturally as it comes!
Take your time and just do a little bit every day! You'll be
shocked at how much you master in just a few weeks time!
Tip 5: Pattern Flow Is Important! One of the most crucial
skills is knowing how to transition from one pattern to another!
In one letter, I explained how to make flash cards to quickly
learn how to flow from one pattern to the next! If you haven't
done that...DO IT NOW!
Tip 6: Understand The Conversational Set-ups! Patterns are
hard to use if you don't know how to introduce them and bring
them up in conversation! For each pattern you want to use you
ought to have at least two ways of bringing it up! I cover this
in several of the Newsletters, so if you haven't got them, all
the back issues are in the back of the workbook in the
Basic/Delux Home Study Course.
Tip 7: Practice Your Closing! So many guys have told me
they've run patterns but when it comes time to closing the
deal..they are stuck! Well, as I have said, if you want a
result, you've got to rehearse it! So prepare your closes in
advance so they flow from you naturally and without thought when
you need them! Along those lines, here are some EXCELLENT
closes:
Close #1: Why don't we continue this somewhere else and see
how much we can enjoy each others company?
Close #2: It's too bad you're not the type of person who can
imagine being together, feeling and doing all the things you
love to feel and do..for all the reasons that make sense to
you..but as you think about it just like that..doesn't it just
seem that spending some time together is something we have to
do?
Close #3: So..what steps would we have to take in order to
make sure we can talk again?
Close #4: I have an intuition..and I don't know if you can
imagine this as I describe it..that when we get a chance to talk
without time pressures or interruptions...we'll really enjoy
each others company..and I'm wondering if there's a number
where you feel comfortable having me call you.
Piece and Peace
Ross
P.S You can get your Speed Seduction® Home Study Course at:
http://www.speedseduction.net/products/rj87.asp
This newsletter, and all of its contents are copyright Ross Jeffries. However this newsletter may be reprinted and re-used in any format, without prior consent, provided all content, including all links, are kept intact, proper credit for authorship is given, and the newsletter is given for free, without charge.
Monday, March 8, 2010
How To Overcome Anxiety And Fear With Women
Dear Speed Seduction® Student,
One of the most common scenarios students present me with is this:
"I do fine if I am introduced to women or already know them. But walking up to a stranger, dead cold, in any situation, scares the bejezus out of me. I just cannot do it. What can I do to resolve this?"
Over the years, I have seen this question or variations on it more times than I can count. If you have felt shy, anxious or even afraid of women, especially beautiful ones, I can assure you that you are far from alone. In fact, I would have to say that fear and shyness around women is so common among men, it's close to being an epidemic.
Now, this "fear factor" can strike guys at different stages. For most, it has to do with the initial approach/ice breaking. For a few guys, approaching is easy, but they freeze up when it comes time to making that serious physical pass. Wherever you may be having your "fear" or "shyness" or "freezing" problem, the good news is that there are powerful solutions to this that can get you going rapidly in the direction you want, without fear, shyness or shame.
I am here to tell you that you can rapidly overcome all of this, just as thousands of guys I have taught have done. I can also assure you that this kind of fear effects guys from all walks of life, from rich to poor, from unathletic dudes to even former U.S Special Forces soldiers. Yes, I mean guys who would have no problem jumping from planes, running through mind fields and dodging bullets have flat out told me, face to face, women scare them silly. The good news, this can all be rapidly overcome with some awareness of how you are producing your shyness and fear and a little retraining of your mind.
Your Fear Is Not A "Thing"
Here is why: "fear" and "shyness" or "hesitation" are not THINGS that happen to you even though it may seem that way.
Remember we spoke in a previous issue about how a woman's "feelings" don't just happen to her by some mysterious magic, but are the result of a recipe or process she runs on herself?
It's the same for any kind of feelings, positive or
negative, that anyone experiences.
Remember this rule for personal change; whatever it is that is troubling you, has a structure and a process, and that it means it can be changed, and even blown apart.
You don't have a bunch of "fear" or "shyness" or
"hesitation" fluid running through your body, like transmission fluid in a car that some mind mechanic has to drain out so you can then be "confident". "Fear" or "shyness" or "hesitation" are internal mental processes that you DO to yourself.
You don't HAVE "shyness". You DO "shyness", usually so
quickly and outside of your awareness of how you are doing it that it seems like something that is just happening to you.
I repeat it again: all humans have their "recipes"-
internal mental processes they do to themselves that produce the final resulting "feelings" of fear, confidence, assurance, calm, etc. So you too have some internal "recipe" that produces your shyness, or hesitation or fear. .
This means that by changing one or more of the elements of your recipe-how you are talking to yourself, what you are visualizing, the flow of energy in your body or your posture and breathing, the resulting "feelings" that come out the other end can be rapidly and radically changed, even if you have suffered from them for a lifetime!
Here's A Method Guaranteed To Work!
We'll examine how to do this in detail, but I want to talk about the most powerful and easily shifted element of any internal "fear" recipe. It's one that most people never even consider, but I will explain not only how to use it to immediately rid yourself of all fear and nervousness around women, but also the science behind it so you will know WHY it works.
I'm talking about the power of your breath. You can look at your breath as the single key ingredient for controlling and designing your state of mind with women. Why is this? Simply because the part of your brain that controls the fight or flight response-that rushing of adrenaline that makes you shake, get short of breath, feel jumpy and want to run from a woman, or just get passive and withdraw-that part of the brain is intimately linked to your breath.
Put simply, you cannot go into the "flight or fight"
response if you learn to control your breath. Control the breath in any situation and you will remain calm; if you've studied any kind of martial arts, you already know this. By controlling your breath and cutting off the fight-flight mechanism, you activate the creative and adaptive layer of your brain, the layer of the brain that is relatively new in terms of evolution.
This layer of your brain can is the same part that helps you think on your feet, adapt to the situation in front of you, remember to try new behaviors, etc. It's also the part of your brain that lets you come up with exactly the right move or exactly the right thing to say an hour after the woman has walked away and you've already calmed down! We want you calmed down, immediately, so you can take advantage of and enjoy the new skills we'll teach you to succeed in every situation! Is this all making sense?
Can you now imagine the power of remaining totally calm, relaxed, confident and secure, in every situation with women?
Now, please remember, this is a practice. Retraining the brain takes some focus, discipline, repetition and time, but it can be done. So do this as a practice, ten minutes a day, every day, for at least the next 2-3 weeks and get ready to enjoy the results you will feel!
A Breath Practice To Destroy All Fear With Women
The first thing I want you to do is take a deep, deep breath in through your nose. Do it right now as you read this. As you breathe in, do it by expanding your rib cage and imagine you are breathing into the center of your chest. Complete the inhale by expanding your belly and pushing it out. Now hold the breath for a just a moment. Begin exhaling, also through your nose. This time, when you exhale, pull your belly toward your spine. Empty your lungs of air and at the end of the exhale, pause for just a
moment. Notice how you can feel that calm moment of silence at the end of the inhale and the end of the exhale.
Ok. Here comes the piece we want to add in. This will really help totally disrupt your fear response. Take another inhale, just like last time, through the nose. This time, as you do, imagine there is a soft line of energy moving down the front of your body and imagine it pooling in the space between your belly button and your pubic bone. In the martial arts, this place is known as the hara, or t'an t'ien. Imagine it swirling there in a clockwise or counter clockwise direction. Either way will work.
When you are finished inhaling, hold the breath for just a moment and feel the calm and silence. Now, when you exhale (through the nose), pull your belly toward your spine and imagine a strong line of energy-an energy of strong will and intent-moving from the small of your back, up your spine and straight out through the top of your head. Feel the strength up your spine and your clarity of mine when you do this strong exhale.
Please note here, when I say "imagine energy" what you ought to do is see some kind of color or feel some kind of feeling-like warmth or heat or tingling, or even a combination of both. It doesn't have to be vivid or super-real; just an idea that this is happening will do.
The keys here: when you inhale, the energy you feel or imagine is soft and relaxed and moves down the front of the body. Almost like a feather brushing the surface of your skin. You imagine it gathering, pooling and swirling in the space between your belly button and pubic pone. When you exhale, the energy going up the spine is inside your body, in your spine, rather than on the surface of the skin. And it is strong AND calm. A relaxed determination. By the way, energetically speaking, this is what women mean when they say they want a guy with "backbone"!!)
They are using a metaphor to describe something that is quite "energetically "real) When you really feel this calm, relaxed, determined feeling, put the fingertip of the first finger of your right hand on the tip of your thumb and touch it gently. As the feelings increase, increase the pressure of the fingertip against the tip of your thumb. You have now created a "calm/confident' anchor for yourself, so when you find yourself in a real world situation with women that's a bit scary, simply do one of the breath cycles (inhale and exhale) as you place your thumb and finger tip together. Increase the pressure of fingertip against thumb to increase the feelings of calm, confident power. I want you to practice this breathing for 10 minutes a day, sitting comfortably or standing.
Ok. Once again, I've overloaded you with information (you should see me at one of my 3 day seminars!). Once again, print this newsletter out, take some time to study it, and re-read it a couple of times again!
Till next issue,
Piece and Peace,
Ross
P.S. Want to wipe out your fear of women in minutes? Check out my new Fear Into Charisma video (with free viewable clips) at
http://www.speedseduction.net/products/rj180.asp
This newsletter, and all of its contents are copyright Ross Jeffries. However this newsletter may be reprinted and re-used in any format, without prior consent, provided all content, including all links, are kept intact, proper credit for authorship is given, and the newsletter is given for free, without charge.
One of the most common scenarios students present me with is this:
"I do fine if I am introduced to women or already know them. But walking up to a stranger, dead cold, in any situation, scares the bejezus out of me. I just cannot do it. What can I do to resolve this?"
Over the years, I have seen this question or variations on it more times than I can count. If you have felt shy, anxious or even afraid of women, especially beautiful ones, I can assure you that you are far from alone. In fact, I would have to say that fear and shyness around women is so common among men, it's close to being an epidemic.
Now, this "fear factor" can strike guys at different stages. For most, it has to do with the initial approach/ice breaking. For a few guys, approaching is easy, but they freeze up when it comes time to making that serious physical pass. Wherever you may be having your "fear" or "shyness" or "freezing" problem, the good news is that there are powerful solutions to this that can get you going rapidly in the direction you want, without fear, shyness or shame.
I am here to tell you that you can rapidly overcome all of this, just as thousands of guys I have taught have done. I can also assure you that this kind of fear effects guys from all walks of life, from rich to poor, from unathletic dudes to even former U.S Special Forces soldiers. Yes, I mean guys who would have no problem jumping from planes, running through mind fields and dodging bullets have flat out told me, face to face, women scare them silly. The good news, this can all be rapidly overcome with some awareness of how you are producing your shyness and fear and a little retraining of your mind.
Your Fear Is Not A "Thing"
Here is why: "fear" and "shyness" or "hesitation" are not THINGS that happen to you even though it may seem that way.
Remember we spoke in a previous issue about how a woman's "feelings" don't just happen to her by some mysterious magic, but are the result of a recipe or process she runs on herself?
It's the same for any kind of feelings, positive or
negative, that anyone experiences.
Remember this rule for personal change; whatever it is that is troubling you, has a structure and a process, and that it means it can be changed, and even blown apart.
You don't have a bunch of "fear" or "shyness" or
"hesitation" fluid running through your body, like transmission fluid in a car that some mind mechanic has to drain out so you can then be "confident". "Fear" or "shyness" or "hesitation" are internal mental processes that you DO to yourself.
You don't HAVE "shyness". You DO "shyness", usually so
quickly and outside of your awareness of how you are doing it that it seems like something that is just happening to you.
I repeat it again: all humans have their "recipes"-
internal mental processes they do to themselves that produce the final resulting "feelings" of fear, confidence, assurance, calm, etc. So you too have some internal "recipe" that produces your shyness, or hesitation or fear. .
This means that by changing one or more of the elements of your recipe-how you are talking to yourself, what you are visualizing, the flow of energy in your body or your posture and breathing, the resulting "feelings" that come out the other end can be rapidly and radically changed, even if you have suffered from them for a lifetime!
Here's A Method Guaranteed To Work!
We'll examine how to do this in detail, but I want to talk about the most powerful and easily shifted element of any internal "fear" recipe. It's one that most people never even consider, but I will explain not only how to use it to immediately rid yourself of all fear and nervousness around women, but also the science behind it so you will know WHY it works.
I'm talking about the power of your breath. You can look at your breath as the single key ingredient for controlling and designing your state of mind with women. Why is this? Simply because the part of your brain that controls the fight or flight response-that rushing of adrenaline that makes you shake, get short of breath, feel jumpy and want to run from a woman, or just get passive and withdraw-that part of the brain is intimately linked to your breath.
Put simply, you cannot go into the "flight or fight"
response if you learn to control your breath. Control the breath in any situation and you will remain calm; if you've studied any kind of martial arts, you already know this. By controlling your breath and cutting off the fight-flight mechanism, you activate the creative and adaptive layer of your brain, the layer of the brain that is relatively new in terms of evolution.
This layer of your brain can is the same part that helps you think on your feet, adapt to the situation in front of you, remember to try new behaviors, etc. It's also the part of your brain that lets you come up with exactly the right move or exactly the right thing to say an hour after the woman has walked away and you've already calmed down! We want you calmed down, immediately, so you can take advantage of and enjoy the new skills we'll teach you to succeed in every situation! Is this all making sense?
Can you now imagine the power of remaining totally calm, relaxed, confident and secure, in every situation with women?
Now, please remember, this is a practice. Retraining the brain takes some focus, discipline, repetition and time, but it can be done. So do this as a practice, ten minutes a day, every day, for at least the next 2-3 weeks and get ready to enjoy the results you will feel!
A Breath Practice To Destroy All Fear With Women
The first thing I want you to do is take a deep, deep breath in through your nose. Do it right now as you read this. As you breathe in, do it by expanding your rib cage and imagine you are breathing into the center of your chest. Complete the inhale by expanding your belly and pushing it out. Now hold the breath for a just a moment. Begin exhaling, also through your nose. This time, when you exhale, pull your belly toward your spine. Empty your lungs of air and at the end of the exhale, pause for just a
moment. Notice how you can feel that calm moment of silence at the end of the inhale and the end of the exhale.
Ok. Here comes the piece we want to add in. This will really help totally disrupt your fear response. Take another inhale, just like last time, through the nose. This time, as you do, imagine there is a soft line of energy moving down the front of your body and imagine it pooling in the space between your belly button and your pubic bone. In the martial arts, this place is known as the hara, or t'an t'ien. Imagine it swirling there in a clockwise or counter clockwise direction. Either way will work.
When you are finished inhaling, hold the breath for just a moment and feel the calm and silence. Now, when you exhale (through the nose), pull your belly toward your spine and imagine a strong line of energy-an energy of strong will and intent-moving from the small of your back, up your spine and straight out through the top of your head. Feel the strength up your spine and your clarity of mine when you do this strong exhale.
Please note here, when I say "imagine energy" what you ought to do is see some kind of color or feel some kind of feeling-like warmth or heat or tingling, or even a combination of both. It doesn't have to be vivid or super-real; just an idea that this is happening will do.
The keys here: when you inhale, the energy you feel or imagine is soft and relaxed and moves down the front of the body. Almost like a feather brushing the surface of your skin. You imagine it gathering, pooling and swirling in the space between your belly button and pubic pone. When you exhale, the energy going up the spine is inside your body, in your spine, rather than on the surface of the skin. And it is strong AND calm. A relaxed determination. By the way, energetically speaking, this is what women mean when they say they want a guy with "backbone"!!)
They are using a metaphor to describe something that is quite "energetically "real) When you really feel this calm, relaxed, determined feeling, put the fingertip of the first finger of your right hand on the tip of your thumb and touch it gently. As the feelings increase, increase the pressure of the fingertip against the tip of your thumb. You have now created a "calm/confident' anchor for yourself, so when you find yourself in a real world situation with women that's a bit scary, simply do one of the breath cycles (inhale and exhale) as you place your thumb and finger tip together. Increase the pressure of fingertip against thumb to increase the feelings of calm, confident power. I want you to practice this breathing for 10 minutes a day, sitting comfortably or standing.
Ok. Once again, I've overloaded you with information (you should see me at one of my 3 day seminars!). Once again, print this newsletter out, take some time to study it, and re-read it a couple of times again!
Till next issue,
Piece and Peace,
Ross
P.S. Want to wipe out your fear of women in minutes? Check out my new Fear Into Charisma video (with free viewable clips) at
http://www.speedseduction.net/products/rj180.asp
This newsletter, and all of its contents are copyright Ross Jeffries. However this newsletter may be reprinted and re-used in any format, without prior consent, provided all content, including all links, are kept intact, proper credit for authorship is given, and the newsletter is given for free, without charge.
Monday, February 22, 2010
What To Say To Meet Women ANYWHERE!
Dear Speed Seduction(R) Student,
Today I received the following question in email:
*****************************************************
I was wondering Ross, if you can suggest some icebreakers or opening lines to initiate conversations with? Like when you see an attractive girl and you want to approach her but you're not sure what to say. You want to say something but you're not sure what and then you think about it to long and its to late!
You know something comfortable that girls will smile at and want to keep the conversation going instead of us constantly talking.
I want her to say something after I initiate it so we can see if there is some chemistry there or not. And being able to get past "Hi"..You know what I mean? Are there some opening lines you can suggest I can use the next time I go out that are appealing? That way I will be armed with some ice breakers and will lead to getting to know someone hopefully.
Could you please let me know at your earliest convenience?
Thank you. Dimitrios
************************************************
Ok. For Dimitrios and all of you reading this:
This all depends on where you find yourself and what you see the girl doing.
This makes sense, doesn't it?
If you want a line that works in every circumstance, in every situation, no matter where you find yourself, and what the girl is doing, I guess you could go,
Hi..I noticed you here and realized if I didn't say something....I'd never get to find out what you're like..other than what I already know.
When she says, "What do you know?"
You say, "That you seem like you'd be cool and fun to talk to. I'm...YOUR NAME HERE".
You see, knowing what to SAY to a woman is utterly and totally dependent on WHAT YOU CAN OBSERVE ABOUT THAT WOMAN.
It's not so much a matter of what to say.
No, the real secret of "opening" women is, knowing what to observe, knowing what to notice, and even KNOWING WHAT TO GET CURIOUS ABOUT.
Does that make sense?
Also, the approach to opening her might differ a bit if she is at a coffee house, quietly studying, as opposed to in a loud restaurant or party, right?
Why?
Because the CONTEXT she is in and what you NOTICE about her is going to be different.
If she's studying, and you notice that she's having a hard time; thinking really hard, talking to herself out loud or just thinking "OUTLOUD" in her head, it would NOT make sense to walk up and ask her opinion about the great band that is playing or where she bought her cool bicycle.
So, I will say it again.
The most important thing, first and foremost, is NOT what you say, but the context she is in, and what you can observe about her and the setting she is in.
Now, many guys ask me about compliments. Should I give them? Is it a good way to first "open up" talking to a woman? If so, what should I compliment?
Ok. I'll repeat: it depends on the context, where she is, what she is doing, and what you NOTICE and can OBSERVE.
Look: whether it is opening her by using a compliment, or asking her a question about something, or making a comment about something she's doing or something going on in the environment, I will ask myself the same question, "What can I notice about this person that I can use to make a connection?"
Now, let's say I notice something about her that I DO find worth complimenting. My rules for complimenting are as follows:
1. NO sexual content in the compliments. That means I don't compliment on her great boobs, great legs, great butt, etc. No woman(no half-way SANE woman) wants a drooling lecher.
2. All compliments to be delivered with good eye contact in fact, ANY openers are delivered this way) with a smile on my face AND in my eyes( I sort of make them twinkle a bit) and delivered with a MATTER of fact voice tone.
This means I don't overdo it with my tone of voice. The compliment is delivered, matter of fact, with no concern on my part whether she will accept it, reject it or anything in between.
It is NOT about her accepting or rejecting what I say. It is ONLY about me wanting to say what I have to say, and any response she has is OK WITH ME.
Really, this is about the sub -text. This means, you see, that there is the surface message, the actual words I say. Those can be important.
But the sub-text is the unspoken or implied message I am delivering about me and how I walk through the world; that ***I*** take full responsibility for how I feel about myself, my situation, the events and circumstances in my life, and I don't need anyone to approve or validate my message.
Now, trust me. When you come from THAT place, and add in a touch of humor....
Almost Anything You Say Will Get A Good Response!
Notice something else. This is a great but different KIND of confidence. It's not the kind of confidence that say, loudly, "I KNOW I AM GOING TO GET WHAT I WANT".
It's more of a, "If I get what I want, that's fine and good, and if not, that's ok too. I'm having fun regardless".
Ok. Back to compliments then.
I prefer to compliment women on the following things:
1. How they carry themselves or how they move. I enjoy a woman who moves beautifully and/or who has great posture. I will tell them so, as follows, "I just wanted to tell....I think you have perfect.......posture. You just carry yourself beautifully."
Notice the ....... This indicates a pause in your speaking. I don't run everythingtogetherintoonesentencelikethis.
No. I take....my....time. I pause, right before I tell them what I am going to tell them, so they will get curious about what I am going to say, and therefore be more receptive.
The pauses in the music are as much a part of the music as the notes, to use a metaphor.
2. How they are dressed. I like to compliment on style. So I will say, "I just wanted to tell you...I admire women with class and style...so I had to say "hi". I'm YOUR NAME HERE."
Note that this is what I call an IMPLIED compliment. I didn't' directly tell her I think SHE has class and style. I said I admire women with class and style, so I had to say "hi". That IMPLIES that I think she has class and style.
Why is this important?
Well, by implying the compliment, she has to use her imagination to interpret what you meant.
Imagination is an ACTIVE process, and so she doesn't resist the message, as she herself has to take an active hand in creating it!
Implied compliments are very useful in slipping past any resistance or skepticism to your message!
This, of course, is part of the number #1 rule in Speed Seduction®: Use your imagination to capture and lead a woman's imagination and emotions!
3. I will compliment on their "energy". I know this is a New Age, California kind of thing, but women are into "energy" or "vibes". It doesn't matter if you believe in it or not-although I hope one day you will.
The important thing is, MOST women believe in it.
So if I notice a woman has a calm, radiant, happy demeanor, I will say, ""I just wanted to tell you.....I think you have..a beautiful....energy about you, and it just made me have to say "hi". I'm YOUR NAME HERE".
Ok. Another major way to meet women is to say something funny; make an observation or comment that is humorous, based on something you can observe.
Now, again, I can't give you a "one line fits all" example, because again, it's based on what you are observing in the actual situation. So you will have to observe her, asking, "What can I notice that I can use to make a connection?".
Next, ask yourself, "How can I phrase that in a clever, funny way that gets attention and makes her laugh?"
This takes some practice. But you can get good at it.
Now, again, I hesitate to give word for word examples, because it depends on what you observe. But let me give you just a couple I have used.
One day, as I sat having coffee, this woman walked into the Coffee B*** and T** L***, a local coffee house chain. I noticed immediately that:
1. She had purple hair 2. She had purple fingernails 3. She had purple eye shadow 4. She had purple lipstick 5. She was wearing purple gym clothes 6. She had purple shoes (Yes, I wondered if her PANTIES were purple, but I didn't ask!)
Now, I could have just made a straight comment/observation, as in, "Wow. I see you like the color purple".
Instead, I chose to be funny. I said, "Hmmm..excuse me...but I'm getting a psychic message about you from the spirit world.
Yes...yes..it's a bit fuzzy..hold on..hold on! Yes, the spirits are telling me..YOU LIKE..THE COLOR....PURPLE.
Now, she busted out laughing and that started the conversation.
nother time, I was with a friend in a restaurant/coffee place and we noticed this very cute Asian girl studying her text book so hard, her ears were about to start smoking. She was obviously having a hard time understanding it, talking to herself out loud and then obviously talking to herself in her head.
We sat at the table near her and I said, "Excuse me..can I ask you not to think too loud? You look like a loud thinker and my friend and I have something very important to discuss."
Now, at that point, she busted up laughing and joined in our conversation.
So again; I can provide examples with this kind of opener. And I can tell you how to come up with your own. But you are going to have to match your opener to what you actually see and observe about her-does that make sense?
Here Are Some Approaches I Do NOT Recommend-
1. Asking her the time, or for directions. It's trite, lame, and then where do you go from there? If you are terribly shy and can't even talk to women, ok, you can start here. But learn to do something else quickly.
2. Being insulting or in any way rude. I don't care what you might have heard. Insulting a woman is stupid. Any woman with choice is just going to move on. If she's kind, she won't insult you back. If she isn't, she just might give a verbal tongue lashing, and that's not the kind of tongue action you want!
3. Invading her space when I meet her. Once I make my initial opening, tell her my name, shake her hand; I then actually take a step back, away from her, to give her back her space.
Women tell me that, to them, it demonstrates respect. It also indicates that, while I am strong enough to come up and meet them, I am also concerned with their safety, and they like that combination. And finally, it indicates a challenge: just because she gave me a good initial response to my opener, doesn't mean she has me! It establishes a challenge, right away.
In any case, whatever approaches you use, bear in mind one more thing I teach my students: 90% of the time, the worst that can happen is NOTHING will happen.
The image of the cold, cruel, rejecting, vicious "bitch"
really exists pretty much only in the movies. Most women, if they aren't interested (and most actually do respond positively to a sincere, fun approach, even if they don't get romantically interested) just won't do anything.
They won't yell.
They won't shoot a dirty look.
They won't hit you or call the cops or the bouncer.
Most, if they just aren't interested, simply WON'T RESPOND.
So get this: the worst that can happen is NOTHING WILL
HAPPEN.
Repeat after me: THE WORST THAT CAN HAPPEN IS: NOTHING WILL HAPPEN.
I've approached thousands of women, literally. In all that
time, maybe 5 instances have I ever been yelled at or have women had something truly vicious to say. And in those cases, I just chalked it up to something that had NOTHING TO DO WITH ME.
Maybe they were having a terrible day. Maybe their boyfriends beat or abused them. Who knows?
I know if I approach someone in a fun, non-threatening, and sincere way, and they are STILL mean, THEY are the ones with the problem.
Again, this means it has to be ok with you if you don't
"win" all the time. Or better still; define winning as having fun, polishing your skill, and learning SOMETHING about the person you are going to meet. That's within the power and ability of EVERY person, and most of the time, you learn something quite pleasant.
Ok. Enough on this. Hope this helps. I've shot a video
series on this and am in the process of editing it. I WILL
ANNOUNCE WHEN IT IS READY, so please don't call the office and bug them about it, OK? They get cranky about that kind of thing and I'm all about...
Peace and piece,
RJ
P.S. You can have all the success with women you've ever wanted right now, by going to:
http://www.speedseduction.net/products/rj87.asp
P.P.S. You can start meeting women, anytime, anywhere
and never worry about what to say:
http://www.speedseduction.net/products/rj185.asp
This newsletter, and all of its contents are copyright Ross Jeffries. However this newsletter may be reprinted and re-used in any format, without prior consent, provided all content, including all links, are kept intact, proper credit for authorship is given, and the newsletter is given for free, without charge.
Today I received the following question in email:
*****************************************************
I was wondering Ross, if you can suggest some icebreakers or opening lines to initiate conversations with? Like when you see an attractive girl and you want to approach her but you're not sure what to say. You want to say something but you're not sure what and then you think about it to long and its to late!
You know something comfortable that girls will smile at and want to keep the conversation going instead of us constantly talking.
I want her to say something after I initiate it so we can see if there is some chemistry there or not. And being able to get past "Hi"..You know what I mean? Are there some opening lines you can suggest I can use the next time I go out that are appealing? That way I will be armed with some ice breakers and will lead to getting to know someone hopefully.
Could you please let me know at your earliest convenience?
Thank you. Dimitrios
************************************************
Ok. For Dimitrios and all of you reading this:
This all depends on where you find yourself and what you see the girl doing.
This makes sense, doesn't it?
If you want a line that works in every circumstance, in every situation, no matter where you find yourself, and what the girl is doing, I guess you could go,
Hi..I noticed you here and realized if I didn't say something....I'd never get to find out what you're like..other than what I already know.
When she says, "What do you know?"
You say, "That you seem like you'd be cool and fun to talk to. I'm...YOUR NAME HERE".
You see, knowing what to SAY to a woman is utterly and totally dependent on WHAT YOU CAN OBSERVE ABOUT THAT WOMAN.
It's not so much a matter of what to say.
No, the real secret of "opening" women is, knowing what to observe, knowing what to notice, and even KNOWING WHAT TO GET CURIOUS ABOUT.
Does that make sense?
Also, the approach to opening her might differ a bit if she is at a coffee house, quietly studying, as opposed to in a loud restaurant or party, right?
Why?
Because the CONTEXT she is in and what you NOTICE about her is going to be different.
If she's studying, and you notice that she's having a hard time; thinking really hard, talking to herself out loud or just thinking "OUTLOUD" in her head, it would NOT make sense to walk up and ask her opinion about the great band that is playing or where she bought her cool bicycle.
So, I will say it again.
The most important thing, first and foremost, is NOT what you say, but the context she is in, and what you can observe about her and the setting she is in.
Now, many guys ask me about compliments. Should I give them? Is it a good way to first "open up" talking to a woman? If so, what should I compliment?
Ok. I'll repeat: it depends on the context, where she is, what she is doing, and what you NOTICE and can OBSERVE.
Look: whether it is opening her by using a compliment, or asking her a question about something, or making a comment about something she's doing or something going on in the environment, I will ask myself the same question, "What can I notice about this person that I can use to make a connection?"
Now, let's say I notice something about her that I DO find worth complimenting. My rules for complimenting are as follows:
1. NO sexual content in the compliments. That means I don't compliment on her great boobs, great legs, great butt, etc. No woman(no half-way SANE woman) wants a drooling lecher.
2. All compliments to be delivered with good eye contact in fact, ANY openers are delivered this way) with a smile on my face AND in my eyes( I sort of make them twinkle a bit) and delivered with a MATTER of fact voice tone.
This means I don't overdo it with my tone of voice. The compliment is delivered, matter of fact, with no concern on my part whether she will accept it, reject it or anything in between.
It is NOT about her accepting or rejecting what I say. It is ONLY about me wanting to say what I have to say, and any response she has is OK WITH ME.
Really, this is about the sub -text. This means, you see, that there is the surface message, the actual words I say. Those can be important.
But the sub-text is the unspoken or implied message I am delivering about me and how I walk through the world; that ***I*** take full responsibility for how I feel about myself, my situation, the events and circumstances in my life, and I don't need anyone to approve or validate my message.
Now, trust me. When you come from THAT place, and add in a touch of humor....
Almost Anything You Say Will Get A Good Response!
Notice something else. This is a great but different KIND of confidence. It's not the kind of confidence that say, loudly, "I KNOW I AM GOING TO GET WHAT I WANT".
It's more of a, "If I get what I want, that's fine and good, and if not, that's ok too. I'm having fun regardless".
Ok. Back to compliments then.
I prefer to compliment women on the following things:
1. How they carry themselves or how they move. I enjoy a woman who moves beautifully and/or who has great posture. I will tell them so, as follows, "I just wanted to tell....I think you have perfect.......posture. You just carry yourself beautifully."
Notice the ....... This indicates a pause in your speaking. I don't run everythingtogetherintoonesentencelikethis.
No. I take....my....time. I pause, right before I tell them what I am going to tell them, so they will get curious about what I am going to say, and therefore be more receptive.
The pauses in the music are as much a part of the music as the notes, to use a metaphor.
2. How they are dressed. I like to compliment on style. So I will say, "I just wanted to tell you...I admire women with class and style...so I had to say "hi". I'm YOUR NAME HERE."
Note that this is what I call an IMPLIED compliment. I didn't' directly tell her I think SHE has class and style. I said I admire women with class and style, so I had to say "hi". That IMPLIES that I think she has class and style.
Why is this important?
Well, by implying the compliment, she has to use her imagination to interpret what you meant.
Imagination is an ACTIVE process, and so she doesn't resist the message, as she herself has to take an active hand in creating it!
Implied compliments are very useful in slipping past any resistance or skepticism to your message!
This, of course, is part of the number #1 rule in Speed Seduction®: Use your imagination to capture and lead a woman's imagination and emotions!
3. I will compliment on their "energy". I know this is a New Age, California kind of thing, but women are into "energy" or "vibes". It doesn't matter if you believe in it or not-although I hope one day you will.
The important thing is, MOST women believe in it.
So if I notice a woman has a calm, radiant, happy demeanor, I will say, ""I just wanted to tell you.....I think you have..a beautiful....energy about you, and it just made me have to say "hi". I'm YOUR NAME HERE".
Ok. Another major way to meet women is to say something funny; make an observation or comment that is humorous, based on something you can observe.
Now, again, I can't give you a "one line fits all" example, because again, it's based on what you are observing in the actual situation. So you will have to observe her, asking, "What can I notice that I can use to make a connection?".
Next, ask yourself, "How can I phrase that in a clever, funny way that gets attention and makes her laugh?"
This takes some practice. But you can get good at it.
Now, again, I hesitate to give word for word examples, because it depends on what you observe. But let me give you just a couple I have used.
One day, as I sat having coffee, this woman walked into the Coffee B*** and T** L***, a local coffee house chain. I noticed immediately that:
1. She had purple hair 2. She had purple fingernails 3. She had purple eye shadow 4. She had purple lipstick 5. She was wearing purple gym clothes 6. She had purple shoes (Yes, I wondered if her PANTIES were purple, but I didn't ask!)
Now, I could have just made a straight comment/observation, as in, "Wow. I see you like the color purple".
Instead, I chose to be funny. I said, "Hmmm..excuse me...but I'm getting a psychic message about you from the spirit world.
Yes...yes..it's a bit fuzzy..hold on..hold on! Yes, the spirits are telling me..YOU LIKE..THE COLOR....PURPLE.
Now, she busted out laughing and that started the conversation.
nother time, I was with a friend in a restaurant/coffee place and we noticed this very cute Asian girl studying her text book so hard, her ears were about to start smoking. She was obviously having a hard time understanding it, talking to herself out loud and then obviously talking to herself in her head.
We sat at the table near her and I said, "Excuse me..can I ask you not to think too loud? You look like a loud thinker and my friend and I have something very important to discuss."
Now, at that point, she busted up laughing and joined in our conversation.
So again; I can provide examples with this kind of opener. And I can tell you how to come up with your own. But you are going to have to match your opener to what you actually see and observe about her-does that make sense?
Here Are Some Approaches I Do NOT Recommend-
1. Asking her the time, or for directions. It's trite, lame, and then where do you go from there? If you are terribly shy and can't even talk to women, ok, you can start here. But learn to do something else quickly.
2. Being insulting or in any way rude. I don't care what you might have heard. Insulting a woman is stupid. Any woman with choice is just going to move on. If she's kind, she won't insult you back. If she isn't, she just might give a verbal tongue lashing, and that's not the kind of tongue action you want!
3. Invading her space when I meet her. Once I make my initial opening, tell her my name, shake her hand; I then actually take a step back, away from her, to give her back her space.
Women tell me that, to them, it demonstrates respect. It also indicates that, while I am strong enough to come up and meet them, I am also concerned with their safety, and they like that combination. And finally, it indicates a challenge: just because she gave me a good initial response to my opener, doesn't mean she has me! It establishes a challenge, right away.
In any case, whatever approaches you use, bear in mind one more thing I teach my students: 90% of the time, the worst that can happen is NOTHING will happen.
The image of the cold, cruel, rejecting, vicious "bitch"
really exists pretty much only in the movies. Most women, if they aren't interested (and most actually do respond positively to a sincere, fun approach, even if they don't get romantically interested) just won't do anything.
They won't yell.
They won't shoot a dirty look.
They won't hit you or call the cops or the bouncer.
Most, if they just aren't interested, simply WON'T RESPOND.
So get this: the worst that can happen is NOTHING WILL
HAPPEN.
Repeat after me: THE WORST THAT CAN HAPPEN IS: NOTHING WILL HAPPEN.
I've approached thousands of women, literally. In all that
time, maybe 5 instances have I ever been yelled at or have women had something truly vicious to say. And in those cases, I just chalked it up to something that had NOTHING TO DO WITH ME.
Maybe they were having a terrible day. Maybe their boyfriends beat or abused them. Who knows?
I know if I approach someone in a fun, non-threatening, and sincere way, and they are STILL mean, THEY are the ones with the problem.
Again, this means it has to be ok with you if you don't
"win" all the time. Or better still; define winning as having fun, polishing your skill, and learning SOMETHING about the person you are going to meet. That's within the power and ability of EVERY person, and most of the time, you learn something quite pleasant.
Ok. Enough on this. Hope this helps. I've shot a video
series on this and am in the process of editing it. I WILL
ANNOUNCE WHEN IT IS READY, so please don't call the office and bug them about it, OK? They get cranky about that kind of thing and I'm all about...
Peace and piece,
RJ
P.S. You can have all the success with women you've ever wanted right now, by going to:
http://www.speedseduction.net/products/rj87.asp
P.P.S. You can start meeting women, anytime, anywhere
and never worry about what to say:
http://www.speedseduction.net/products/rj185.asp
This newsletter, and all of its contents are copyright Ross Jeffries. However this newsletter may be reprinted and re-used in any format, without prior consent, provided all content, including all links, are kept intact, proper credit for authorship is given, and the newsletter is given for free, without charge.
Sunday, May 24, 2009
How To Find Success Without Struggle
Have you ever found yourself tired, stressed out, overwhelmed, lonely and discouraged?
We all have at one time or another. And each time it happened to me, after I got over it, I vowed to never let it happen again...
... but of course, it DID happen again! And again, and again, and again...
Finally, in quiet moment of reflection after studying the ancient texts, it dawned on me exactly what I was doing that was causing my suffering. In fact,
this one thing was the "root" of all of my problems, and the key to my success!
What was it? It was this: I was using will and effort.
Using will and effort is like pushing the car uphill, rather than sitting in the car and driving it!
And by doing so I was literally standing in the way of the divine protective spirit that wanted to bless me and give me all of my desires!
It was like a light-switch went on!
Now combined with ancient wisdom of the Samurai, the Kahunas, the Mind Masters and Authentic Warriors and Innovators - literally, the Warrior Kings! – the principle of the "way of no way" finally made perfect sense!
So I grabbed my binder of the original "Knowing is Not Enough" private newsletters with Bruce Lee's handwritten studies and notes (I am one of only
a few dozen people in the world blessed to have this), and I found where Bruce was able to accomplish so much in such a short period of time - it was
the same principle - he Played By the Rules of the Enlightened Warrior King!
And so can YOU!
Listen up, friend. Life can be a struggle, or a joy. The difference is in knowing how to align the three selves, apply the learnings therein, and like water you become unstoppable!
You see, this is the Secret of Success without Struggle in ANY area of life - your relationships, your health, your financial abundance and spiritual peace.
That's the beauty and simplicity of the Warrior King Lifestyle - you don't even intend to do it. It just simply is. Water doesn't intend to go where it goes - it doesn't "try" to go where it goes - it just goes there!
And, like water... I go wherever I want and I manifest whatever I want
...and YOU can do the same thing!
Listen. If you're tired of the stops and struggles, ups and downs, and frustrations that never seem to stop, the information in the Speed Summit Home Study Course can change it once and for all.
This is not an exaggeration, but a simple statement of fact.
Join me, Dr. Yates Canipe and Master Vince Wingo on this path and YOU can have these same secrets.
No stone went unturned in the live quest for the secret of success without struggle. We caught it all live on DVD and it's available for YOU right NOW
Wisdom and Courage,
Scott Bolan
We all have at one time or another. And each time it happened to me, after I got over it, I vowed to never let it happen again...
... but of course, it DID happen again! And again, and again, and again...
Finally, in quiet moment of reflection after studying the ancient texts, it dawned on me exactly what I was doing that was causing my suffering. In fact,
this one thing was the "root" of all of my problems, and the key to my success!
What was it? It was this: I was using will and effort.
Using will and effort is like pushing the car uphill, rather than sitting in the car and driving it!
And by doing so I was literally standing in the way of the divine protective spirit that wanted to bless me and give me all of my desires!
It was like a light-switch went on!
Now combined with ancient wisdom of the Samurai, the Kahunas, the Mind Masters and Authentic Warriors and Innovators - literally, the Warrior Kings! – the principle of the "way of no way" finally made perfect sense!
So I grabbed my binder of the original "Knowing is Not Enough" private newsletters with Bruce Lee's handwritten studies and notes (I am one of only
a few dozen people in the world blessed to have this), and I found where Bruce was able to accomplish so much in such a short period of time - it was
the same principle - he Played By the Rules of the Enlightened Warrior King!
And so can YOU!
Listen up, friend. Life can be a struggle, or a joy. The difference is in knowing how to align the three selves, apply the learnings therein, and like water you become unstoppable!
You see, this is the Secret of Success without Struggle in ANY area of life - your relationships, your health, your financial abundance and spiritual peace.
That's the beauty and simplicity of the Warrior King Lifestyle - you don't even intend to do it. It just simply is. Water doesn't intend to go where it goes - it doesn't "try" to go where it goes - it just goes there!
And, like water... I go wherever I want and I manifest whatever I want
...and YOU can do the same thing!
Listen. If you're tired of the stops and struggles, ups and downs, and frustrations that never seem to stop, the information in the Speed Summit Home Study Course can change it once and for all.
This is not an exaggeration, but a simple statement of fact.
Join me, Dr. Yates Canipe and Master Vince Wingo on this path and YOU can have these same secrets.
No stone went unturned in the live quest for the secret of success without struggle. We caught it all live on DVD and it's available for YOU right NOW
Wisdom and Courage,
Scott Bolan
Sunday, May 17, 2009
Chump Change
As you can tell I keep up with most of what our government is up to. I think it comes from living just outside Washington for 9 years. I took both papers Washington Post and Washington Times. One is very liberal and one is very conservative.
The President proposed $17 Billion in Budget Cuts after approving a budget of $3500 BILLION. The cuts amount to less than 0.5 %. The Budget Director says, “$17 billion is not chump change by any measure.” Personally I am always looking for money and find it laying on the ground, in parking lots, etc. I pick it up and put it in my pocket.
However, this started me thinking. How much do you budget for self improvement. You Know, education, personal change, updating your knowledge, moving past limiting beliefs and moving ahead. Is 0.5 % of your annual income Chump Change to you. There was one year back there where my wife and I invested $30k yes, $30,000 in one year to do self improvement workshops. They worked and were a great investment. The IRS did not think so and would not let us deduct the expense, even though our incomes doubled over the next five years.
Now if you make $30,000 a year and invest $150.00 a year in yourself then you are spending your chump change wisely. That is an average of about 41 cents per day. Feel better now. I think I am worth more and I continue to attend and buy courses. I mean, how else am I supposed to keep up with you?
One comment I read agreed that the $17 Billion was chump change and the average taxpayer is the chump. Another made some comment about the chump change we can believe in. Well when I spend it on me, I can believe in it. What are you going to do with your chump change.
Dr YJC
The President proposed $17 Billion in Budget Cuts after approving a budget of $3500 BILLION. The cuts amount to less than 0.5 %. The Budget Director says, “$17 billion is not chump change by any measure.” Personally I am always looking for money and find it laying on the ground, in parking lots, etc. I pick it up and put it in my pocket.
However, this started me thinking. How much do you budget for self improvement. You Know, education, personal change, updating your knowledge, moving past limiting beliefs and moving ahead. Is 0.5 % of your annual income Chump Change to you. There was one year back there where my wife and I invested $30k yes, $30,000 in one year to do self improvement workshops. They worked and were a great investment. The IRS did not think so and would not let us deduct the expense, even though our incomes doubled over the next five years.
Now if you make $30,000 a year and invest $150.00 a year in yourself then you are spending your chump change wisely. That is an average of about 41 cents per day. Feel better now. I think I am worth more and I continue to attend and buy courses. I mean, how else am I supposed to keep up with you?
One comment I read agreed that the $17 Billion was chump change and the average taxpayer is the chump. Another made some comment about the chump change we can believe in. Well when I spend it on me, I can believe in it. What are you going to do with your chump change.
Dr YJC
Saturday, May 16, 2009
Economic Justice
In Erickson Covert Hypnosis you are not looking for the traditional or Hollywood eyes closed slumped over asleep response from a person. You are just looking for a phrase or couple of words to get past the conscious mind and find a home in the subconscious. On of the effective ways to do this is ambiguity. You use a couple of words that are not used together in the normal language. You do not define these words. They mean something to you. They mean something different to every individual that hears them or maybe they don’t mean anything to the person hearing them as they are new together. This is exactly the case with the term “Economic Justice” as used by the head man in Washington. He know what it means. Everyone else hears Economic separately from Justice and does not know what it means. No one defines it. Is it Socialism by another word? You choose.
More recently, Torture is the new buzz word. At first is seems that Torture was used to get worthless information. When it was shown without a doubt that the information obtained by the interrogation methods was indeed very valuable, then the rhetoric changed. It is now proclaimed that the valuable information that was obtained could have been gotten by “OTHER METHODS.” Again “other methods” is not defined or even one example given or a even a source of these mysteriously powerful “other methods” given. Evidently no one else in the government has or had any knowledge of said “other methods.”
Start listening with your other mind and other ears for other frequencies. Start paying attention to all your senses. Something may feel wrong, not look right, sound funny, smell odd or just leave a bad taste in your mouth.
On the other hand, as you read our justice ramblings, notice the good feeling you get. The sense that it makes perfect sense, doesn’t it. It rings true. Smells deliciously inviting as you just know the right track when you are on it. Ready to join us.
Dr YJC
More recently, Torture is the new buzz word. At first is seems that Torture was used to get worthless information. When it was shown without a doubt that the information obtained by the interrogation methods was indeed very valuable, then the rhetoric changed. It is now proclaimed that the valuable information that was obtained could have been gotten by “OTHER METHODS.” Again “other methods” is not defined or even one example given or a even a source of these mysteriously powerful “other methods” given. Evidently no one else in the government has or had any knowledge of said “other methods.”
Start listening with your other mind and other ears for other frequencies. Start paying attention to all your senses. Something may feel wrong, not look right, sound funny, smell odd or just leave a bad taste in your mouth.
On the other hand, as you read our justice ramblings, notice the good feeling you get. The sense that it makes perfect sense, doesn’t it. It rings true. Smells deliciously inviting as you just know the right track when you are on it. Ready to join us.
Dr YJC
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Is there a secret of unlimited prosperity?
What kind of prosperity: Financial prosperity, effortless prosperity, creating true prosperity, open your mind to prosperity, power and prosperity, prosperity consciousness, true prosperity, creating true prosperity
First, let us define Prosperity - A condition of being successful or thriving.
Most people think of this as having a lot of money. This is not a necessary condition of prosperity.
I have a neighbor whose father worked in a oil refinery as a maintenance man his entire life. When he died he was a multi-millionaire. He also had a knack and discipline for investing in the stock market. Was he prosperous? You Bet, he raised his family well, all the kids went to college and are successful in their occupations. He lived a modest life style because he was happy and content within himself and it shows with his kids. Is this unlimited prosperity? For him it was. Does the foundations that the Gates’ or Rockefellers’ and others set up make their families prosperous without limit or simply wealthy. Your choice. So creating true effortless prosperity is about your knowledge of yourself. It is not about power and prosperity as power really has nothing to do with prosperity. Creating true prosperity requires you to simply open your mind to prosperity and understanding the difference between Money, Wealth and Prosperity. Does this give new meaning to Financial prosperity, I think so.
Dr YJC
First, let us define Prosperity - A condition of being successful or thriving.
Most people think of this as having a lot of money. This is not a necessary condition of prosperity.
I have a neighbor whose father worked in a oil refinery as a maintenance man his entire life. When he died he was a multi-millionaire. He also had a knack and discipline for investing in the stock market. Was he prosperous? You Bet, he raised his family well, all the kids went to college and are successful in their occupations. He lived a modest life style because he was happy and content within himself and it shows with his kids. Is this unlimited prosperity? For him it was. Does the foundations that the Gates’ or Rockefellers’ and others set up make their families prosperous without limit or simply wealthy. Your choice. So creating true effortless prosperity is about your knowledge of yourself. It is not about power and prosperity as power really has nothing to do with prosperity. Creating true prosperity requires you to simply open your mind to prosperity and understanding the difference between Money, Wealth and Prosperity. Does this give new meaning to Financial prosperity, I think so.
Dr YJC
Friday, May 8, 2009
You Don’t Know What You Look Like
I am not talking about looking at pictures, or watching yourself on videos or looking in the mirror while you are reciting your affirmations. I mean that you don’t know what you look like from the perspective of someone else. You don’t know what they see, sense, feel or think when they look at you and experience you. Is that important? You bet you butt it is. If you are interviewing, then the job depends on it. If you are approaching the opposite sex and expecting a warm reception, then it is paramount.
If we have established that it is important and that “You Don’t Know What You Look Like,” then it is also probably true that you don’t know how to find out how you look either.
It is simple. Ask people. Ask the people closest to you. Ask strangers. Ask early in conversations. There are several ways to ask. Ask them to give you three words that come to mind when they met you or three words that best describe you in their view. You can say, “You have known me all my life, in one sentence describe me and I don’t mean physically. Describe me as a person.”
Now you may be surprised at the answers you get. The person giving you the answers at a particular point in time is looking at you, sensing you through their own filters. For example, if they are very religious and sense the goodness in you, then that will be in their response. You will most likely get a lot of different answers and also a pattern will emerge.
Let me know your experiences and we will continue this interchange.
Dr YJC
If we have established that it is important and that “You Don’t Know What You Look Like,” then it is also probably true that you don’t know how to find out how you look either.
It is simple. Ask people. Ask the people closest to you. Ask strangers. Ask early in conversations. There are several ways to ask. Ask them to give you three words that come to mind when they met you or three words that best describe you in their view. You can say, “You have known me all my life, in one sentence describe me and I don’t mean physically. Describe me as a person.”
Now you may be surprised at the answers you get. The person giving you the answers at a particular point in time is looking at you, sensing you through their own filters. For example, if they are very religious and sense the goodness in you, then that will be in their response. You will most likely get a lot of different answers and also a pattern will emerge.
Let me know your experiences and we will continue this interchange.
Dr YJC
Tuesday, May 5, 2009
Words That Sell
Recently a competitor had the courage to contact me and ask me why their ad copy wasn't doing very well.
It was easy to see. The message of the ad was soft.
A soft message is great if your market is soccer moms.
But if your market is those who are interested in becoming 1000x SMARTER, STRONGER, DEADLIER and MORE EFFECTIVE in the REAL WORLD, your message needs to be PENETRATING.
Otherwise, it won't jump out and grab their attention.
If your message is soft and unfocused, it will not sell.
It'd be like trying to hit someone in the balls with a pillow, and hitting them on the leg instead.
No pain. No gain. (as far as "getting the message across" goes)
Hard and focused, like a solid nard-smashing knee to the balls...
...now THAT's where the money is!
Also, that is WHAT and HOW I teach:
Whatever your goal...
HIT the target, WIN the trophy.
Smash the Pinata, collect the candy.
Capiche? Comprende? Understand?
Strike the root!
Are you ready to learn the root-striking methods of warrior kings?
Then catch it live on DVD, right here
Unlocking the Secrets,
Scott Bolan
It was easy to see. The message of the ad was soft.
A soft message is great if your market is soccer moms.
But if your market is those who are interested in becoming 1000x SMARTER, STRONGER, DEADLIER and MORE EFFECTIVE in the REAL WORLD, your message needs to be PENETRATING.
Otherwise, it won't jump out and grab their attention.
If your message is soft and unfocused, it will not sell.
It'd be like trying to hit someone in the balls with a pillow, and hitting them on the leg instead.
No pain. No gain. (as far as "getting the message across" goes)
Hard and focused, like a solid nard-smashing knee to the balls...
...now THAT's where the money is!
Also, that is WHAT and HOW I teach:
Whatever your goal...
HIT the target, WIN the trophy.
Smash the Pinata, collect the candy.
Capiche? Comprende? Understand?
Strike the root!
Are you ready to learn the root-striking methods of warrior kings?
Then catch it live on DVD, right here
Unlocking the Secrets,
Scott Bolan
Friday, May 1, 2009
Spare the Rod and Spoil the Child, Attention ALL you Children
What kind of rod did your parents use on you. The metaphor is strong and what is the real message. I think every person want to find their soul mate, settle down, have children and raise their children in such a way that the kids have an opportunity to have it easier than they did, to go farther than they did, to experience more than they did. How they do that raises many questions. How much do you give your children? How do you insure that they earn it? How do you instill responsibility in them? The metaphor was not intended to be taken literally, meaning that if you don’t whip or beat your children they will grow up to be spoiled. However, there are several lessons children need to learn. There are consequences for their actions. There are responsibilities that need to be taught and expected.
If you are driving and forget to put gas in your car, then it will stop. If you run out of gas, you can cuss, you can pray, you can meditate, you can do anything you want and the only thing that will work is to put gas in the tank. Or you can simply say, I forgot to put gas in the car, now I am paying the consequences. And I will learn a lesson and go on.
So many people today are not taking responsibility for their life. They are blaming the government, the economy, wall street, the banks or the company they DID work for.
A call yesterday was from a young man talking about how he was investing in himself at this time. He said he knew his situation was getting better since he had started making that investment. In the next breath, he said he could not purchase any more right now because he had to wait for things to get better economically.
There was another young man who graduated from welding school 8 months ago. He has worked 14 days total since for three different companies and go let go by each. He has continued to make excuses about not taking a lesser job and when the stimulus kicks in he will be in the gravy. What will it take to wake him up? When do those who are supporting him wake up and stop?
If you are one of those who are procrastinating then WAKE UP. The knowledge and inner strength gained from the truly applied NLP, Hypnosis, Huna and Martial Arts is very believable and doable. The TOOLS exists. The technologies taken separately are absolutely mind changing. When they are taken together, consequences and responsibility take on a beautiful and brilliantly new meaning.
Despair becomes aspire for you.
Dr YJC
If you are driving and forget to put gas in your car, then it will stop. If you run out of gas, you can cuss, you can pray, you can meditate, you can do anything you want and the only thing that will work is to put gas in the tank. Or you can simply say, I forgot to put gas in the car, now I am paying the consequences. And I will learn a lesson and go on.
So many people today are not taking responsibility for their life. They are blaming the government, the economy, wall street, the banks or the company they DID work for.
A call yesterday was from a young man talking about how he was investing in himself at this time. He said he knew his situation was getting better since he had started making that investment. In the next breath, he said he could not purchase any more right now because he had to wait for things to get better economically.
There was another young man who graduated from welding school 8 months ago. He has worked 14 days total since for three different companies and go let go by each. He has continued to make excuses about not taking a lesser job and when the stimulus kicks in he will be in the gravy. What will it take to wake him up? When do those who are supporting him wake up and stop?
If you are one of those who are procrastinating then WAKE UP. The knowledge and inner strength gained from the truly applied NLP, Hypnosis, Huna and Martial Arts is very believable and doable. The TOOLS exists. The technologies taken separately are absolutely mind changing. When they are taken together, consequences and responsibility take on a beautiful and brilliantly new meaning.
Despair becomes aspire for you.
Dr YJC
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
Can you give me some advice on Goal Setting?
You know what they say advice is worth. My goal is to give you some tools that you will use. The first tool is to realize that you already have goals that your mind is working on 100 percent of the time. The object is to consciously change those.
One goal setting technique many recommend is writing down goals. This is good. The results usually are limited. Think of it this way. If you are baking and keep opening the oven door to check on the contents, then what happens: The baking fails. Follow these steps to increase the effectiveness of your writing.
1. Write down in objective terms where you are now. I make xxx dollars. I have had three dates this year. I have a bachelor degree.
2. Write down a time frame. 6 months, 1 year, 2 years. Put this date on the outside of an envelope.
3. Write down in objective terms where you want to be in the stated time frame. I will be making YYY dollars. I will have had 14 dates. I will have my masters degree.
By making this simple adjustment, you are giving you subconscious mind the instructions and trusting it to do its job. Of course, if you set goals you do not believe, then you have missed realistic goal setting and missed the premise of this new dynamic of goal setting.
This will work for sales goal setting, performance goal setting, business goal setting, weight loss goal setting, fitness goal setting or professional goal setting. This is just one smart goal setting strategy.
For success in your personal planning goal setting, the secret is do it consciously and realistically. When the mind sees a new strategy that is working, it will quickly adapt it to other applications (goals). Practice, for example, is a great way to achieving many goals, this success will be the motivation to continue goal setting. You don’t need a big elaborate program for goal setting. Effective goal setting is can be short term or long term. The secret is how the conscious and subconscious mind relate to the goal setting idea and the help given the subconscious.
In coaching soccer, I gather the players around before the game and ask each the same question, “What is your goal for this game?” One replies, “To score a goal” I say, “Then you focus on that” Another says, “To assist on a goal” Another says, “To have a shutout” Another says, “To stay in the game at max speed the entire game” You guessed it. I tell each of them to focus on their goal for the game. And guess what happens to the team.
State your short term goal to your subconscious; out loud if possible as both conscious and subconscious (Greater Mind) get it simultaneously. Do It And Notice What Happens.
Your Guide to The Future
Dr YJC
One goal setting technique many recommend is writing down goals. This is good. The results usually are limited. Think of it this way. If you are baking and keep opening the oven door to check on the contents, then what happens: The baking fails. Follow these steps to increase the effectiveness of your writing.
1. Write down in objective terms where you are now. I make xxx dollars. I have had three dates this year. I have a bachelor degree.
2. Write down a time frame. 6 months, 1 year, 2 years. Put this date on the outside of an envelope.
3. Write down in objective terms where you want to be in the stated time frame. I will be making YYY dollars. I will have had 14 dates. I will have my masters degree.
By making this simple adjustment, you are giving you subconscious mind the instructions and trusting it to do its job. Of course, if you set goals you do not believe, then you have missed realistic goal setting and missed the premise of this new dynamic of goal setting.
This will work for sales goal setting, performance goal setting, business goal setting, weight loss goal setting, fitness goal setting or professional goal setting. This is just one smart goal setting strategy.
For success in your personal planning goal setting, the secret is do it consciously and realistically. When the mind sees a new strategy that is working, it will quickly adapt it to other applications (goals). Practice, for example, is a great way to achieving many goals, this success will be the motivation to continue goal setting. You don’t need a big elaborate program for goal setting. Effective goal setting is can be short term or long term. The secret is how the conscious and subconscious mind relate to the goal setting idea and the help given the subconscious.
In coaching soccer, I gather the players around before the game and ask each the same question, “What is your goal for this game?” One replies, “To score a goal” I say, “Then you focus on that” Another says, “To assist on a goal” Another says, “To have a shutout” Another says, “To stay in the game at max speed the entire game” You guessed it. I tell each of them to focus on their goal for the game. And guess what happens to the team.
State your short term goal to your subconscious; out loud if possible as both conscious and subconscious (Greater Mind) get it simultaneously. Do It And Notice What Happens.
Your Guide to The Future
Dr YJC
Sunday, April 26, 2009
What Could You Do If You Were Not Afraid?
If you weren't afraid...
... you could look life in the eye and tell the truth, boldly and graciously going for what you want and getting it.
If you weren't afraid...
... you'd stop blaming others and circumstances, and start making changes within yourself and make better decisions.
If you weren't afraid...
... you would find opportunities instead of reasons.
If you weren't afraid...
... you would ask her out, and she would be delighted to say yes.
If you weren't afraid...
... you'd put down the pills, alcohol and cigarettes, and go on a walk instead.
If you weren't afraid...
...you'd stop asserting your beliefs, and simply BE them instead.
If you weren't afraid...
... you'd stop being cynical, and open up your creativity and intuition - and find your possibilities expanding.
If you weren't afraid...
... you'd stay home and work on yourself, instead of following the impulses of others seeking amusement and diversions.
If you weren't afraid...
... you'd magnetize what you want, and repel what you don't want, effortlessly.
If you weren't afraid...
... money would come to you quite easily, you'd have more than enough and it would be no big deal.
What would life be like if you weren't afraid?
Now is the time to find out.
One of the first things I'll show you in the Martial Mastery course is a simple method to get rid of fear instantly and forever.
Is that fair?
Sincerely,
Scott Bolan
I'm Ready To Start
... you could look life in the eye and tell the truth, boldly and graciously going for what you want and getting it.
If you weren't afraid...
... you'd stop blaming others and circumstances, and start making changes within yourself and make better decisions.
If you weren't afraid...
... you would find opportunities instead of reasons.
If you weren't afraid...
... you would ask her out, and she would be delighted to say yes.
If you weren't afraid...
... you'd put down the pills, alcohol and cigarettes, and go on a walk instead.
If you weren't afraid...
...you'd stop asserting your beliefs, and simply BE them instead.
If you weren't afraid...
... you'd stop being cynical, and open up your creativity and intuition - and find your possibilities expanding.
If you weren't afraid...
... you'd stay home and work on yourself, instead of following the impulses of others seeking amusement and diversions.
If you weren't afraid...
... you'd magnetize what you want, and repel what you don't want, effortlessly.
If you weren't afraid...
... money would come to you quite easily, you'd have more than enough and it would be no big deal.
What would life be like if you weren't afraid?
Now is the time to find out.
One of the first things I'll show you in the Martial Mastery course is a simple method to get rid of fear instantly and forever.
Is that fair?
Sincerely,
Scott Bolan
I'm Ready To Start
Thursday, April 23, 2009
Is She Playing Games?
Here is the situation. Tony is 53 and looks 35 to 40. He works out several nights a week at the local health club. A younger woman shows up and starts working out. She is sharp in Tony’s eyes. He notices that she is a novice and could use some assistance. No one else in the club approaches or offers assistance. So Tony does. Suddenly, she is friendly so appreciative of the work out advice that she offers to take Tony to dinner as a token of her appreciation. He gets to choose the place.
During their workouts she shares that she is not married and never has been. She also states that she has a trust issue and that there was this one man who stalked her. She also stated that she has never been in love.
This goes on for about two weeks. No dinner. However they do seem to know each others schedule for the work outs. Then one night as they are walking across the parking lot to their cars another car shows up with a guy in it. She goes over to talk to the guy as Tony leaves.
The next time they see each other at the club she informs him that he does not have to stay until she leaves. He wasn’t planning to stay and leaves as planned.
Now suddenly, men are coming up to him in the club and wanting to know what is going on. Are they an item or what? Women are approaching him wanting to know the same thing. These are people who have been members for a while as Tony has, however they have never approached him.
The young lady now does not want to workout with Tony. She will take to him. He asked about the guy in the car in the parking lot. Oh, he just a guy I met in the sporting goods store last week.
So what is going on? Is she playing a game or not? There are inconsistencies in her statements. Tony wants to know what to do. First, she is playing some kind of game. Tony is there to work out and should stay focused on that as he always has. I told him to ask more questions as the opportunity arises and expect nothing except to find out her map of the world. For Example ask, “How do you know when you can trust someone” or “How do you identify a stalker” or “I am ready for that dinner and thank you for offering. Can we go to Jason’s Deli” or “How will you know when you fall in Love.”
During their workouts she shares that she is not married and never has been. She also states that she has a trust issue and that there was this one man who stalked her. She also stated that she has never been in love.
This goes on for about two weeks. No dinner. However they do seem to know each others schedule for the work outs. Then one night as they are walking across the parking lot to their cars another car shows up with a guy in it. She goes over to talk to the guy as Tony leaves.
The next time they see each other at the club she informs him that he does not have to stay until she leaves. He wasn’t planning to stay and leaves as planned.
Now suddenly, men are coming up to him in the club and wanting to know what is going on. Are they an item or what? Women are approaching him wanting to know the same thing. These are people who have been members for a while as Tony has, however they have never approached him.
The young lady now does not want to workout with Tony. She will take to him. He asked about the guy in the car in the parking lot. Oh, he just a guy I met in the sporting goods store last week.
So what is going on? Is she playing a game or not? There are inconsistencies in her statements. Tony wants to know what to do. First, she is playing some kind of game. Tony is there to work out and should stay focused on that as he always has. I told him to ask more questions as the opportunity arises and expect nothing except to find out her map of the world. For Example ask, “How do you know when you can trust someone” or “How do you identify a stalker” or “I am ready for that dinner and thank you for offering. Can we go to Jason’s Deli” or “How will you know when you fall in Love.”
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
Phone Number Leads to Failure?
There seems to be a rash of partial successes these days. I have had several guys call complaining about getting phone numbers and NO RESULTS. Well, they got a result; just not the one they wanted or expected. They have varied. One gentleman ran a few patterns; she seemed to respond from his point of view and asked for his phone number. He was ecstatic and thought he was on his way. She never called.
Another young man has had a lot of success IN HIS VIEW because he never got anywhere before and now he is getting lots of phone numbers. However, when he calls, they are ALL turning out to be flakes again in his view. They will not talk to him and are always to busy to talk.
Let’s talk about social programming first. In the south, most of the young ladies are brought up to be non-confrontational; that is to be very polite. They are told that even if they do not like the male who is approaching to be polite and get rid of him quickly by GIVIING HIM A PHONE NUMBER. They have no intention of talking with you. They believe that after one or two calls you will stop calling and they have gotten rid of you without hurting your feelings or being confrontational (saying they do not like you) or (you are not their type) or (etc).
Now listen up, no matter what course you are studying or what guru you like to think is right for you, there is something missing. It called calibration and/or test closing. You think she is responding strongly and then she flakes. IT IS VERY SIMPLE, FRIENDS. SHE DOES NOT RESPOND THE WAY YOU WANT OR EXPECT BECAUSE “IT IS NOT IMPORTANT ENOUGH TO HER (not important enough to her). You think it is and she does not. Now whose fault is that.
There are lots of ways to calibrate or test. Start by asking questions like: Are you enjoying this conversation as much as you seem to me.
In the end you must get confirmation. One traditional suggestion is to follow up the agreement to talk or meet again with this question: “How do I know that you will call” or “How do I know that you will be available to talk and we will continue” These short retorts may sound good on the surface. BUT stop and think about it. You may be coming off as uncertain and asking for reassurance. You may be coming off as whiney and needy (depending on your voice and energy).
Here is my suggestion. You ask the female. “I’m curious, How do YOU know that YOU will call”, “I’m curious, How do YOU know that YOU will answer and be ready to continue…”
This way you are asking for HER PROCESS as to what makes things important to her. If she does not respond or can’t respond, then you know you have more to do with her to make yourself MORE IMPORTANT with her.
Of course ladies, the exact same thing is true when you are dealing with what you perceive as flaky guys.
Dr YJC
Another young man has had a lot of success IN HIS VIEW because he never got anywhere before and now he is getting lots of phone numbers. However, when he calls, they are ALL turning out to be flakes again in his view. They will not talk to him and are always to busy to talk.
Let’s talk about social programming first. In the south, most of the young ladies are brought up to be non-confrontational; that is to be very polite. They are told that even if they do not like the male who is approaching to be polite and get rid of him quickly by GIVIING HIM A PHONE NUMBER. They have no intention of talking with you. They believe that after one or two calls you will stop calling and they have gotten rid of you without hurting your feelings or being confrontational (saying they do not like you) or (you are not their type) or (etc).
Now listen up, no matter what course you are studying or what guru you like to think is right for you, there is something missing. It called calibration and/or test closing. You think she is responding strongly and then she flakes. IT IS VERY SIMPLE, FRIENDS. SHE DOES NOT RESPOND THE WAY YOU WANT OR EXPECT BECAUSE “IT IS NOT IMPORTANT ENOUGH TO HER (not important enough to her). You think it is and she does not. Now whose fault is that.
There are lots of ways to calibrate or test. Start by asking questions like: Are you enjoying this conversation as much as you seem to me.
In the end you must get confirmation. One traditional suggestion is to follow up the agreement to talk or meet again with this question: “How do I know that you will call” or “How do I know that you will be available to talk and we will continue” These short retorts may sound good on the surface. BUT stop and think about it. You may be coming off as uncertain and asking for reassurance. You may be coming off as whiney and needy (depending on your voice and energy).
Here is my suggestion. You ask the female. “I’m curious, How do YOU know that YOU will call”, “I’m curious, How do YOU know that YOU will answer and be ready to continue…”
This way you are asking for HER PROCESS as to what makes things important to her. If she does not respond or can’t respond, then you know you have more to do with her to make yourself MORE IMPORTANT with her.
Of course ladies, the exact same thing is true when you are dealing with what you perceive as flaky guys.
Dr YJC
Sunday, April 19, 2009
Wake Up People
I received a call today. The young man wanted to know how he could become aware. He wants to do one on one with someone and felt I had been the most responsive and had moved him farther than anyoneelse.
I will explain tomorrow. Here is the assignment I gave him today. Go out and start being curious about your environment whatever it might be. Pick up a leaf and examine it. NOTICE things about it that you never noticed before. Look at the buildings. Notice the different styles, construction techniques, building material. Ask questions of yourself about these things.
Then go to a place with lots of people. Walk around and look each person in the eye and NOTICE how many of them actually even know you exist. When you find one that will make eye contact, SMILE. Then NOTICE their reactions.They will probably be delighted to find someone else AWARE, ALIVE, AWAKE.
So Long For Now.
Dr YJC
I will explain tomorrow. Here is the assignment I gave him today. Go out and start being curious about your environment whatever it might be. Pick up a leaf and examine it. NOTICE things about it that you never noticed before. Look at the buildings. Notice the different styles, construction techniques, building material. Ask questions of yourself about these things.
Then go to a place with lots of people. Walk around and look each person in the eye and NOTICE how many of them actually even know you exist. When you find one that will make eye contact, SMILE. Then NOTICE their reactions.They will probably be delighted to find someone else AWARE, ALIVE, AWAKE.
So Long For Now.
Dr YJC
Thursday, April 16, 2009
You in Your Affirmations
The You in your affirmations is your subconscious. Your subconscious is the power behind your conscious mind and ego. Make friends with this absolute power in your life. Are you reading and getting this, yes you your subconsctious.
Stand up now and say, "Thank you, yes thank you subconscious for taking great care of me. Now it is time for us to work more closely. Remind me to address you correnctly so that you may accomplish more and frustration by me goes away."
Dr YJC
Stand up now and say, "Thank you, yes thank you subconscious for taking great care of me. Now it is time for us to work more closely. Remind me to address you correnctly so that you may accomplish more and frustration by me goes away."
Dr YJC
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
Are you an Eagle? Are you still in the Nest?
Art Jackson is an author who teaches a course on Manifesting Your Destiny. We carry the course. Art’s course is basically about that calling to serve and finding a way to change careers where you get that internal satisfaction that is missing in most jobs. If you are interested in changing careers during these times, then it may be for you. Now for one of his stories.
When Eagle parents have a new Eagle on the way, they go to some extreme measures to insure the proper Eagle upbringing for the soon arriving baby. They build a nest way up high and in an isolated location, like on the side of a steep cliff. They want it high for a couple of reasons. First, the new baby is protected from almost all predators. Second, when it leaves the nest, it can’t walk, it must fly.
Once a location is found, they build the nest structure using very sharp thorny limbs and branches. Then the Mom and Dad Eagles put in a layer of thicker softer material like leaves. This is then covered with softer material such as grass and straw. The last layer of material is very soft and an absolute dream for the Eagle eggs. The nest is perfectly insulated and heavenly comfortable.
The young Eagle is born. They are nourished in delightfully luxurious surroundings. They are spoiled. As they grow and their wings become strong, they get on the side of the nest and flap their wings. His wings become strong. They are capable of flying; however, he will not leave the nest. Remember, the only way to leave is to fly.
The wise Eagles know when the young Eagle is ready to fly. Getting them to leave the nest is now the task at hand. They start removing the top layers of the nest lining. With each removed layer, guess what is exposed? Have you like me been anticipating the short and long term strategies of the Eagle.
The very sharp thorns are exposed more and more each day. The baby Eagle has no where comfortable to go. Soon the entire nest including the edges are nothing but very sharp thorns. The young Eagle reaches the point where the pain of staying is more compelling than the fear of flight. They must leave.
You know the ending, don’t you? The young Eagles leap from the nest and FLY.
Can you Soar on the Wings Of Eagles? Have you had enough? Has that pain of doing nothing reached the threshold of the fear of flying? Have I hit a tender spot? Can you see thru the metaphor? Can you hear the wind move through your wings? Can you see over the horizon NOW? God, I love the smell of Napalm in the morning.
Dr YJC
When Eagle parents have a new Eagle on the way, they go to some extreme measures to insure the proper Eagle upbringing for the soon arriving baby. They build a nest way up high and in an isolated location, like on the side of a steep cliff. They want it high for a couple of reasons. First, the new baby is protected from almost all predators. Second, when it leaves the nest, it can’t walk, it must fly.
Once a location is found, they build the nest structure using very sharp thorny limbs and branches. Then the Mom and Dad Eagles put in a layer of thicker softer material like leaves. This is then covered with softer material such as grass and straw. The last layer of material is very soft and an absolute dream for the Eagle eggs. The nest is perfectly insulated and heavenly comfortable.
The young Eagle is born. They are nourished in delightfully luxurious surroundings. They are spoiled. As they grow and their wings become strong, they get on the side of the nest and flap their wings. His wings become strong. They are capable of flying; however, he will not leave the nest. Remember, the only way to leave is to fly.
The wise Eagles know when the young Eagle is ready to fly. Getting them to leave the nest is now the task at hand. They start removing the top layers of the nest lining. With each removed layer, guess what is exposed? Have you like me been anticipating the short and long term strategies of the Eagle.
The very sharp thorns are exposed more and more each day. The baby Eagle has no where comfortable to go. Soon the entire nest including the edges are nothing but very sharp thorns. The young Eagle reaches the point where the pain of staying is more compelling than the fear of flight. They must leave.
You know the ending, don’t you? The young Eagles leap from the nest and FLY.
Can you Soar on the Wings Of Eagles? Have you had enough? Has that pain of doing nothing reached the threshold of the fear of flying? Have I hit a tender spot? Can you see thru the metaphor? Can you hear the wind move through your wings? Can you see over the horizon NOW? God, I love the smell of Napalm in the morning.
Dr YJC
Sunday, April 12, 2009
Affirmation for Seduction
You will learn the tonality and pauses to effectively speak seductively.
Dr YJC
Dr YJC
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