Dear Speed Seduction® Student,
I just got TWO emails from students reporting their incredible results with women, using my system, and I HAD to share them with you.
As you read them, and imagine enjoying these results for yourself, you will notice that these guys give SPECIFIC descriptions of the techniques they used from my courses (and also give some juicy details about what the women did to and WITH them as a result!)
I want you to get excited as you read these two emails and wonder, WHEN WILL I BUY MY HOME STUDY COURSE SO I CAN ENJOY THESE RESULTS AS WELL?
Here are the emails:
Hi Ross and Everyone,
An amazing story for me. I met this girl who I went to elementary and middle school with through the Internet. We both used to live in Monterey and grew up around each other, but then I moved to another town and 8 years later we meet in another town.
Story- I instant message girl online, talked for a little while and met the following night. She came over here, I introduced cube game to her, then I talked about how I was learning to be a blissnotist, but I didn't go into detail about it until she came over. I think that made her really curious to meet me. Then I read some poetry and used the loop technique from a newsletter that was sent out before. The we started having wild passionate sex.
Well after we had sex she had mentioned Monterey and how she used to live there and I told her I used to live there, then I asked her what school she went to and the school she named was the same school I went to, then I asked her what her name was again and she said it and I told her I knew someone by that name that went to the same school I went to and that the girl I knew by that name had invited me to go to a special birthday celebration she had for her 15th birthday, where she had to dance at the thing.
Well, I told her I remember telling the girl I knew that I wouldn't go to her birthday celebration cause I was supposed to dance with her but that I didn't know how to dance Spanish music. So I never went.
She then paused and looked shock and then she asked me what was the girls last name that I knew and I told her. She suddenly looked even more shocked and then I was kinda shocked by her shockness. She asked me what my name was and well I use a different name when I meet woman from the Internet, but then I told her my first name and last name and she repeated it and said slowly, with a still shocked look on her face "Oh My God, you're so and so"
Then I pulled out pictures and yearbooks and there we were as youngsters in the yearbooks, me looking like a dork, I always thought she was hot being a cheerleader all throughout the whole time we went to school together. So the mood changed from passionate to being really aware.
We both lived on the same street in Monterey too. She lived just a few houses down from mine. I even described her house to her I, what her yard looked like. I went so far back that I took her to a time when I rode by on my bicycle stopped in front of her house as she was walking towards her front door and smiled at her as she stopped for a second and smiled back. I remembered and described what she was wearing that day. Now we're seeing each other. I've elicited her most important values and they just so happen to match mine which is really good.
Thanks, Ross!
BM
Could use a bit of assistance here... I'll try to be brief but that's not my strong-suit - LOL!
Background - I seem to be having a lot of success with neighbors. 1st night closes with both the woman who lives on top of me and the one in front (my complex is a target rich environment!). (Oh, and Ross - the second one happened days after I got back from LA. Thanks again for your time while I was there, and yes, I know she's also "geographically undesirable", but oh so desirable in every other way!)
The fling with the girl on top lasted a few weeks; we're still friends. She was fun and I enjoyed her, but not what I'm looking for long term. The one in front is another matter. She'd be an HB11 on my uncle's scale (a 9 with money!). She's the topic of this post.
I've known her casually for some time. She's very reclusive and hard to get to know; she's lived in front of me for over a year and a half... Does travel a lot with work, but most of the time you'd never know 'cuz when she is home she's rarely seen. Over the past few months I'd seen a bit more of her. She came out with her niece and nephew to play with my dog one day and we had a good conversation. A couple of weeks later, I was out detailing my car and she again came down to chat (very unusual for her!). The following weekend, she was out cleaning HER car and we started chatting, among other things she said that I'd inspired her (one good sign!). She also asked if I knew who lives above her, because they were up all night partying and having sex she couldn't get any sleep. I blushed, smiled sheepishly and said "That was probably actually us" (the other neighbor had been over the night before, and my bedroom is directly behind this one's...). She replied that if was me she wouldn't complain to the complex, but to get on the floor next time 'cuz my bed squeaks. I ended up trading a wax job (on the car, not her - LOL!) in exchange for her taking me to happy hour. A few days after that I left town for a while so didn't get a chance to take her up on the happy hour for a while.
Two days after I got back from my trip (I did some one-on-one counseling in LA with Marilyn Sargent and spent an afternoon with Ross) I ran into her out front. She invited me to come by later to watch a movie, and I countered with her coming to my place since I've got a nice home theater. She agreed and showed up a bit later. We decided just to talk & get to know each other a bit instead of the movie, which culminated in a late night visit to the Jacuzzi and spending the night at her place (hot sex, pussy breath and all!!!). Only two moments of last minute resistance; on the way to the pool I started holding her hand and she said "Wait a minute. We're holding hands! What about Jeannie (other neighbor)?" I replied, "Jeannie said she wants to see other people." which is true, by the way. That settled that. Then, just as we were getting into bed, she goes, "Hold on, we're neighbors! Doesn't that pose a problem for ... wait, I guess not. Nevermind..."
Brother BB
************************************************************
Now what are you looking for? CHRISTMAS! Call right now and get YOUR Home Study Course and enjoy results like these!
Piece and Peace,
RJ
This newsletter, and all of its contents are
copyright 2004, Ross Jeffries. However this
newsletter may be reprinted and re-used in
any format, without prior consent, provided
all content, including all links, are kept
intact, proper credit for authorship is given,
and the newsletter is given for free,
without charge.
Showing posts with label seduction. Show all posts
Showing posts with label seduction. Show all posts
Friday, February 4, 2011
Friday, January 28, 2011
How To Get Unstuck And Going Strong With Speed Seduction®!
Dear Speed Seduction® Student,
Many times, beginning students have said or written to me,
"I'm just having trouble getting started with this stuff. It's
not that I'm really shy or anything...it's just that this way of
talking seems SO strange to me."
Now listen; I am very aware that a first introduction to
Speed Seduction® can seem overwhelming and also a little, well,
ooky.
After all, if a guy walked up to you and talked to you the
way I am teaching you to talk to women, you'd probably call the
cops or punch him in the mouth. Perhaps if you were an extra
compassionate person, you'd refer him to a mental health clinic
for counseling.
Look, I'm very, very aware that the ways I'm teaching you to
communicate with women seem very strange. Further I'm here to
tell you..
....THEY SHOULD SEEM STRANGE TO YOU!
*******************************************
ADVERTISEMENT
To check out the latest Speed Seduction® products
to super-charge your love life, go to:
http://www.speedseduction.net/products.asp
*******************************************
Is this a contradiction?? How could something that could
help you have success with women beyond your wildest
fantasies..something that could take that old, rusty stuck door
of not getting anywhere or having to "settle" and...
...Make It Swing Wide Open With Excitement, Passion And The
Connections With They Kind Of Women You've Always Wanted.
Well, here is the secret in a nut-shell: women think about
and process language DIFFERENTLY.
We men tend to process words and language through the left
brain. But scientific studies, using brain scans have shown that
women process the same words and phrases using the left AND
right brains; that the same language that evokes little or no
emotional response from men, evokes massive emotional response
from women.
This means that the language that seems funny, bizarre or
off to you, will be processed by women in a way that opens the
deep, emotional, suggestive structures of their minds.
Now, don't get me wrong. All humans, male or female, are
subject to great emotional response, based on symbols. Just
think of the strong emotions that rush through you when you are
traveling in a foreign land and you see the American flag.(This
could be good or bad, depending what country you are from-since
my students come from all around the world, I have to be
careful!)
Of when you hear your countries national anthem. Or when you
see the sun finally come out on a clear day after a long bout of
darkness and rain.
These symbols and events evoke emotion, strongly, in ALL
humans. It is simply that women also happen to have strong
responses to language, spoken and written, that we men simply
usually don't.
What does this really mean for you? That if you can push
past your initial responses that this stuff may seem odd or
weird and instead, understand HOW it works, go out and give it a
try, then....
....The Results You Will See Will Astonish You!
A couple of quick metaphors to help you understand this.
When you go fishing, if you were to go fishing, would you bait
the hook with YOUR favorite snack foods because worms or
crawdads would taste bad to you?
No. You would bait it with what the FISH bites on and
desires.
Finally, supposing you were driving on a country road, late
at night, and a UFO landed right in front of you. Out stepped an
alien from a very advanced species. You knew that if you could
communicate with him, he would unveil incredible technology to
you that could solve world hunger, bring unlimited wealth,
riches, and happiness to the world, end disease, and make your
own personal dreams come true and more. He could unlock the
answer to any question, but..
He didn't speak a word of any language on earth!
Instead, you had to learn to speak to him in HIS language,
something that seemed at first like gibberish, hard to
pronounce, and not making any sense to you.
Would you refuse his offer of a device that would teach you,
in a few weeks, to speak to him in his own tongue, just because
it felt weird and made no sense to you?
Or would you take his language machine, learn to speak to
him in a way that HE understood and responded to, and...
...COLLECT TREASURES AND TECHNOLOGY BEYOND YOUR WILDEST DREAMS?
Now look: women are NOT aliens. But sometimes, the way they
process language, words and emotions can make us FEEL like they
are from another planet. Speed Seduction® will hand you that
universal translator/language machine so you can take them on
journeys OUT OF THIS WORLD!
Peace and piece,
Ross Jeffries
P.S. If you want to unstuck yourself and really get kicking
ass with Speed Seduction®, check out this product from
my top student and co-trainer, Dave Riker! It is flying off
our shelves!
http://www.daveriker.com/ssmanual/index.html
This newsletter, and all of its contents are
copyright 2004, Ross Jeffries. However this
newsletter may be reprinted and re-used in
any format, without prior consent, provided
all content, including all links, are kept
intact, proper credit for authorship is given,
and the newsletter is given for free,
without charge.
Many times, beginning students have said or written to me,
"I'm just having trouble getting started with this stuff. It's
not that I'm really shy or anything...it's just that this way of
talking seems SO strange to me."
Now listen; I am very aware that a first introduction to
Speed Seduction® can seem overwhelming and also a little, well,
ooky.
After all, if a guy walked up to you and talked to you the
way I am teaching you to talk to women, you'd probably call the
cops or punch him in the mouth. Perhaps if you were an extra
compassionate person, you'd refer him to a mental health clinic
for counseling.
Look, I'm very, very aware that the ways I'm teaching you to
communicate with women seem very strange. Further I'm here to
tell you..
....THEY SHOULD SEEM STRANGE TO YOU!
*******************************************
ADVERTISEMENT
To check out the latest Speed Seduction® products
to super-charge your love life, go to:
http://www.speedseduction.net/products.asp
*******************************************
Is this a contradiction?? How could something that could
help you have success with women beyond your wildest
fantasies..something that could take that old, rusty stuck door
of not getting anywhere or having to "settle" and...
...Make It Swing Wide Open With Excitement, Passion And The
Connections With They Kind Of Women You've Always Wanted.
Well, here is the secret in a nut-shell: women think about
and process language DIFFERENTLY.
We men tend to process words and language through the left
brain. But scientific studies, using brain scans have shown that
women process the same words and phrases using the left AND
right brains; that the same language that evokes little or no
emotional response from men, evokes massive emotional response
from women.
This means that the language that seems funny, bizarre or
off to you, will be processed by women in a way that opens the
deep, emotional, suggestive structures of their minds.
Now, don't get me wrong. All humans, male or female, are
subject to great emotional response, based on symbols. Just
think of the strong emotions that rush through you when you are
traveling in a foreign land and you see the American flag.(This
could be good or bad, depending what country you are from-since
my students come from all around the world, I have to be
careful!)
Of when you hear your countries national anthem. Or when you
see the sun finally come out on a clear day after a long bout of
darkness and rain.
These symbols and events evoke emotion, strongly, in ALL
humans. It is simply that women also happen to have strong
responses to language, spoken and written, that we men simply
usually don't.
What does this really mean for you? That if you can push
past your initial responses that this stuff may seem odd or
weird and instead, understand HOW it works, go out and give it a
try, then....
....The Results You Will See Will Astonish You!
A couple of quick metaphors to help you understand this.
When you go fishing, if you were to go fishing, would you bait
the hook with YOUR favorite snack foods because worms or
crawdads would taste bad to you?
No. You would bait it with what the FISH bites on and
desires.
Finally, supposing you were driving on a country road, late
at night, and a UFO landed right in front of you. Out stepped an
alien from a very advanced species. You knew that if you could
communicate with him, he would unveil incredible technology to
you that could solve world hunger, bring unlimited wealth,
riches, and happiness to the world, end disease, and make your
own personal dreams come true and more. He could unlock the
answer to any question, but..
He didn't speak a word of any language on earth!
Instead, you had to learn to speak to him in HIS language,
something that seemed at first like gibberish, hard to
pronounce, and not making any sense to you.
Would you refuse his offer of a device that would teach you,
in a few weeks, to speak to him in his own tongue, just because
it felt weird and made no sense to you?
Or would you take his language machine, learn to speak to
him in a way that HE understood and responded to, and...
...COLLECT TREASURES AND TECHNOLOGY BEYOND YOUR WILDEST DREAMS?
Now look: women are NOT aliens. But sometimes, the way they
process language, words and emotions can make us FEEL like they
are from another planet. Speed Seduction® will hand you that
universal translator/language machine so you can take them on
journeys OUT OF THIS WORLD!
Peace and piece,
Ross Jeffries
P.S. If you want to unstuck yourself and really get kicking
ass with Speed Seduction®, check out this product from
my top student and co-trainer, Dave Riker! It is flying off
our shelves!
http://www.daveriker.com/ssmanual/index.html
This newsletter, and all of its contents are
copyright 2004, Ross Jeffries. However this
newsletter may be reprinted and re-used in
any format, without prior consent, provided
all content, including all links, are kept
intact, proper credit for authorship is given,
and the newsletter is given for free,
without charge.
Monday, January 17, 2011
When To Be Sexually Aggressive With Women
Dear Speed Seduction® Student,
One of the more common scenarios I get presented with is
students who are good at some of the stages of seduction, but
tend to choke at “the closing”.
That is, they are good at the pick-up, good at the middle
stage, even good at getting a lady to make out with them.
But somehow, when it comes to “going for the goods”, they
drop the ball.
In fact, just recently, I received the following email from
a student:
"Ross, The last two newsletters were awesome.
I have had your home study course for a while, but have been
tripping over my own dick for the last year.
I feel like I am developing rapport and getting women in the
state of mind that I want them, but I have also missed
opportunities because I am used to being "shy" to make the move.
My most recent missed opportunity occurred with a nice
looking 18 year old. I banged her mom using the blammo pattern,
and then her mom set me up with her daughter.
I did the discovery channel pattern with the daughter and
she kissed me. I still didn't close the deal!! Sounds pretty
sad huh?
This kind of interaction has happened time and time again,
even before I bought your course.
The strange thing is that most of these women seem upset
after the fact. I am willing to do what you outlined in the new
letters in order to become a more calm and confident version of
myself, and realize the opportunity when it happens, and not
after the fact.
Am I the only student you have had that can't close the deal
when the girl kisses him?
Thank you in advance for your response."
Your humble student,
Paul Ruggerio, Eaton Rapids, MI
Ok, Paul, and all of the rest of you who may have this
issue:
Let’s get this clear: just because a woman is kissing us and
making out with us, does NOT mean she is sufficiently turned on
or ready, in her own mind, to “dip the donkey”.
In fact, I have learned that many women need alternating
periods of being heated up, then cooled down, then heated up
even more strongly, when it comes to getting physical.
In hypnosis, we call this fractionation. Simply put, you
put someone in a trance, then take them out again. When you put
them back in, they go back in deeper than the previous time.
Each time you take them out of the trance it builds potential to
have a stronger trance response when you put them back in.
I think many, if not MOST women, are this way, with being
physically turned on. If you make out with them, raise them to a
plateau of excitement, then slow down and back up a bit, they
will be FAR more receptive when you turn the heat back on.
So usually, when you start making out with a woman, it’s
actually a good idea to get her sizzling for about ten minutes,
then drop back down a level. If you are at “third base” back off
to light kissing. Even take a break, go to the bathroom, and
come back. Or move her to a different part of the house, and
then resume.
We men are like rockets with our excitement: we take off
straight up. Women respond better with zigs and zags.
Now, as for why this student didn’t get more aggressive, I
think often it is because we are shocked that the patterns
actually work, even more so on women that are hotter and younger
than we are used to getting.
Over the years I have seen this happen with many students:
the first few times they try Speed Seduction® they do NOT expect
it to work! And when it does, they don’t know quite what to do.
As if suddenly you are holding a ten million dollar lottery
ticket in your hand and you are staring at the numbers because
you can’t believe you won!
I remember one story in particular, about a student who had
just gotten his Home Study Course and used some patterns on an
attractive woman at his church social.
She insisted they go out to the parking lot and then she
jumped all over him, performed some “oral fun” on him, and then
said, “Bang me. Put me on the hood of the car and bang me.”
The student said, “But the pastor is going to be come out
with the congregation any minute!”
She said, “I don’t the pastor to bang me! I want YOU to bang
me!”
Now, this guy was so shocked, Mr. Pee Pee wouldn’t do the
job, so he wound up having to take a rain check!
The bottom line is, you need to mentally rehearse success!
Literally act out what you will say and do in response to a
woman really wanting you, indeed insisting on having you.
Now, another issue is that sometimes women who are turned on
and do want you will suddenly pull up short and have some last
minute resistance to doing the “grown-up”.
We’ll explore THAT one in the next issue.
‘Til then,
Peace and piece
Ross Jeffries
P.S. You can have all the success with women you’ve ever
wanted right now, by going to:
http://www.speedseduction.net/products/rj87.asp
This newsletter, and all of its contents are
copyright 2004, Ross Jeffries. However this
newsletter may be reprinted and re-used in
any format, without prior consent, provided
all content, including all links, are kept
intact, proper credit for authorship is given,
and the newsletter is given for free,
without charge.
One of the more common scenarios I get presented with is
students who are good at some of the stages of seduction, but
tend to choke at “the closing”.
That is, they are good at the pick-up, good at the middle
stage, even good at getting a lady to make out with them.
But somehow, when it comes to “going for the goods”, they
drop the ball.
In fact, just recently, I received the following email from
a student:
"Ross, The last two newsletters were awesome.
I have had your home study course for a while, but have been
tripping over my own dick for the last year.
I feel like I am developing rapport and getting women in the
state of mind that I want them, but I have also missed
opportunities because I am used to being "shy" to make the move.
My most recent missed opportunity occurred with a nice
looking 18 year old. I banged her mom using the blammo pattern,
and then her mom set me up with her daughter.
I did the discovery channel pattern with the daughter and
she kissed me. I still didn't close the deal!! Sounds pretty
sad huh?
This kind of interaction has happened time and time again,
even before I bought your course.
The strange thing is that most of these women seem upset
after the fact. I am willing to do what you outlined in the new
letters in order to become a more calm and confident version of
myself, and realize the opportunity when it happens, and not
after the fact.
Am I the only student you have had that can't close the deal
when the girl kisses him?
Thank you in advance for your response."
Your humble student,
Paul Ruggerio, Eaton Rapids, MI
Ok, Paul, and all of the rest of you who may have this
issue:
Let’s get this clear: just because a woman is kissing us and
making out with us, does NOT mean she is sufficiently turned on
or ready, in her own mind, to “dip the donkey”.
In fact, I have learned that many women need alternating
periods of being heated up, then cooled down, then heated up
even more strongly, when it comes to getting physical.
In hypnosis, we call this fractionation. Simply put, you
put someone in a trance, then take them out again. When you put
them back in, they go back in deeper than the previous time.
Each time you take them out of the trance it builds potential to
have a stronger trance response when you put them back in.
I think many, if not MOST women, are this way, with being
physically turned on. If you make out with them, raise them to a
plateau of excitement, then slow down and back up a bit, they
will be FAR more receptive when you turn the heat back on.
So usually, when you start making out with a woman, it’s
actually a good idea to get her sizzling for about ten minutes,
then drop back down a level. If you are at “third base” back off
to light kissing. Even take a break, go to the bathroom, and
come back. Or move her to a different part of the house, and
then resume.
We men are like rockets with our excitement: we take off
straight up. Women respond better with zigs and zags.
Now, as for why this student didn’t get more aggressive, I
think often it is because we are shocked that the patterns
actually work, even more so on women that are hotter and younger
than we are used to getting.
Over the years I have seen this happen with many students:
the first few times they try Speed Seduction® they do NOT expect
it to work! And when it does, they don’t know quite what to do.
As if suddenly you are holding a ten million dollar lottery
ticket in your hand and you are staring at the numbers because
you can’t believe you won!
I remember one story in particular, about a student who had
just gotten his Home Study Course and used some patterns on an
attractive woman at his church social.
She insisted they go out to the parking lot and then she
jumped all over him, performed some “oral fun” on him, and then
said, “Bang me. Put me on the hood of the car and bang me.”
The student said, “But the pastor is going to be come out
with the congregation any minute!”
She said, “I don’t the pastor to bang me! I want YOU to bang
me!”
Now, this guy was so shocked, Mr. Pee Pee wouldn’t do the
job, so he wound up having to take a rain check!
The bottom line is, you need to mentally rehearse success!
Literally act out what you will say and do in response to a
woman really wanting you, indeed insisting on having you.
Now, another issue is that sometimes women who are turned on
and do want you will suddenly pull up short and have some last
minute resistance to doing the “grown-up”.
We’ll explore THAT one in the next issue.
‘Til then,
Peace and piece
Ross Jeffries
P.S. You can have all the success with women you’ve ever
wanted right now, by going to:
http://www.speedseduction.net/products/rj87.asp
This newsletter, and all of its contents are
copyright 2004, Ross Jeffries. However this
newsletter may be reprinted and re-used in
any format, without prior consent, provided
all content, including all links, are kept
intact, proper credit for authorship is given,
and the newsletter is given for free,
without charge.
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
Wimps Into Winners: How To Pass A Woman's B.S. Tests And Win Her Over, Hard!
Dear Speed Seduction® Student,
There's a common saying in street fighting that 95% of all
real fights wind up in a clinch and go to the ground. Could that
really be true? Frankly, I don't know. But I will say this: 95%
of the time, a woman will test you by the second date, or
sooner, to see:
1. If you'll take her bullshit.
2. How hungry you are for her attention (remember: those who
look hungry, never get fed)
3. Just how much control she can exert over you and/or the
relationship.
In this issue, I'd like to talk about how you can pass those
tests, and how to do some testing of your own. Believe me, this
is important. If you've ever been dumped for being "too nice",
or have been told, time and again, "let's just be friends", it's
because you haven't learned to recognize when you're being
tested or just haven't yet learned how to properly respond. You
thought you would get points for being "co-operative" and
"helpful", and instead you just got the fuzzy end of the
lollipop.
Why She Tests You: The Search For Strength And Certainty
Look: one of the primary things that women are looking for
from a man is security; the feeling that someone is stronger
than they are. When you put a woman in her place, when you set
rules and boundaries for her to follow, it lets her know she can
relax around you and feel comfortable and secure. This search
for strength is the single most important reason why she tests
you. The other factor is ambivalence, or what I call the "make
up my mind for me" syndrome.
You see, the sad reality is that often a woman just isn't
that interested in you one way or another. Maybe you aren't
exactly the physical type she goes for, maybe she just got
burned in a bad relationship, or there's some unseen competitor
who she's waiting to hear from. What ever her reasons, you can
tell this is happening when you hear something like, "Uh...well,
I'd like to go out with you Friday, but why don't you call me
late Friday afternoon and I'll let you know for sure?"
Finally, there is the fact that sometimes, modern women just
get overwhelmed with eighty billion things they are trying to do
at once. And, when overwhelmed, they flake on commitments that
occur during the peak of the overwhelm.
How To Handle It…Dealing From A Position Of Strength
To get back to street fighting analogies, there's a concept
from Jeet Kun Do, the fighting style of the late, great Bruce
Lee that basically says that any weapon thrust your way, as part
of an attack is just a convenient target to be destroyed. Coming
from this perspective, an attack, rather than something to be
feared, is just an unprecedented opportunity to.... KICK THE
OTHER GUY'S ASS!!!!
Just so, a woman's bullshit and tests are great
opportunities to establish respect and dramatically increase her
interest in you. In other words, your response to these tests,
instead of being, "Oh no.…why is she doing this? What did I do
wrong?", from now on will be.... AH, HAH! A RESPECT
OPPORTUNITY!!!
Look: your attitude has to be that every rude piece of
behavior, every silly test of hers is just an unprecedented
opportunity for you to establish respect, increase her interest,
and intensify her desire to please you. Taken from this
perspective, you'll be mentally prepared, and may even find
yourself actually looking forward to her trying to pull shit,
since you know it's your chance to get her really hot for
you!!!! Now, before we go on to some specific scenarios, let me
add one other thing: when you do put her in her place. ...
IT'S GOT TO COME FROM THE RIGHT PLACE IN YOU!!!
In other words, the macho idiot who loses control and
trashes the place when his girlfriend comes home ten minutes
late is definitely not the example to follow. All he's doing is
showing he can't control himself and he just earns the woman's
contempt. Notice I'm not saying you can't or shouldn't get a
little pissed. Just don't go nutso with a stream of obscenities.
(Streams of obscenities are for afterward, when you are in bed
with her.)
The other thing that doesn't work is acting like a hurt
little boy. Whining stuff like, "How could you do this to me?"
or, "But you promised!" won't cut it, good buddy. No. You have
to come from the calm, but firm "take it or leave it" position.
This is all part of displaying the critically important.........
WILLINGNESS TO WALK AWAY FROM HER!!!
You see, after years of experience and study, I've come to
the conclusion that a woman can only experience real passion for
you if on some level she believes she could do something to lose
you! Understand that when you show this willingness to walk
away, in any area of your life, it conveys the message that you
are the prize to be pursued, that you are the person of value,
and they had better take advantage of the opportunity. This is
an attitude that will move you forward in any area that's
challenging you.
By way of contrast, if you show a non-stop, forever and ever
devotion to her, and put up with her crap and ambivalence, then
where is that tension of knowing she could lose you? Answer:
nowhere! And that's why you get nowhere when you put up with
this kind of stuff! If you've seen an initially hot relationship
grow ice-cold, this is one big reason!!! Ok. On to some
scenarios.
Scenario one: You call to ask her out for the first time.
Her response is ambivalent, something like, "Well, I'd like to
but, why don't you call me later in the week and...." Here's
your response: "Let me ask you a question, point blank. Is going
out with me something you can take or leave or is it something
that you're smart enough that you really want to do that?" Then
shut the hell up and listen for her answer.
Now, what are you doing here? You're calling her on her
ambivalence and letting her know you don't have time to be put
on hold. And you're also suggesting she's stupid if she doesn't
grab this opportunity.
Finally, you're embedding a command (about which much more
later in other issues of this newsletter) that she really does
want to go out with you. Will this work? Very often it does.
It's not what she's expecting, and that always gets attention.
Just be as matter of fact and non-hostile as you can.
Understatement works best with this one. What if she still
hesitates? Well, say this one: You: Look. You have my number,
and I'm going to leave it up to you. And you know, if you don't
call it's going to be a loss for me, but maybe what you won't
realize until after you hang up is, that it'll be a loss for you
as well. Ok? Bye.
Scenario Two: She calls and cancels at the last minute
without offering to do it again at some specific time. (I've
heard every excuse in the book, my friend, from "My parakeet is
sick" to "I've got to shampoo the rug". Seriously)
Her: I can't make it. I've got a rare tropical disease
that's causing me to shrink by the hour.
You:(dead silence for as long as it takes for her to talk
again. Just say NOTHING!!!)
Her: Hello? Are you there? What's wrong?
You: What's wrong is I can't believe the bullshit I'm
hearing.
Her: What?????
You: Look...you made a commitment to spend time with me and
now you're blowing me off. You're disrespecting me and
disrespecting my time and I'm NOT going to put up with it. My
rule is, if someone makes a commitment to me, I expect them to
keep it. If they can't keep it, I need to know at least a day in
advance so I can make other plans. Got it? If you can live with
that rule, great...if not, sayonara!
Then, HANG UP!! Now, this may sound extreme, but man does it
work well!!! In fact, she'll probably call back with five
minutes and apologize and ask you out!!! I'm not kidding here;
I've seen the hardest, jaded bitches go to giggly little girls,
eager to please me when I've done this. It throws some kind of
switch in their heads. I guess with some people, you don't
really get their attention until...
You Give Them A Swift Kick In The Ass!!
Please note, I’m speaking of an attitude. I am NOT talking
about or in any way suggesting or condoning physical violence
with a woman. In fact, I am against the use or threat of the use
of violence or force against ANY human being, unless there is an
imminent threat of violence against yourself or a loved one. I
can’t make this too clear. I’m talking about using your mind,
NOT your fists.
Scenario Three: You go to pick her up at her place and she
either keeps you waiting outside for more than ten minutes, or
lets you in and then proceeds to talk on the phone for at least
that long while totally ignoring you. Wait for her to finish,
and as soon as she does say something like this:
YOU: Can I ask you a question?
HER: Sure.
YOU: Are you being intentionally rude to test me, or are you
just accidentally acting clueless?
HER:(mouth dropping open in shock, unable to say anything!)
YOU: Don't ever keep me waiting like this again, ok? I'll
always treat you respectfully, but I expect the same. Do you
understand me?
HER: Uh..uh...yes.
The point is this: when women throw this stuff your way, you
want to do the unexpected. Don’t put up with it, like a “nice
guy” and don’t lose your temper like a jerk. Walk a middle
ground of strength, self-control AND self-respect, and these
tests will become opportunities to power her straight into your
bed.
And that certainly beats a poke in the eye, doesn’t it?
‘Til next time,
Piece and peace
Ross
P.S. To order the amazing, life-changing, girl-getting Speed
Seduction(r) Home Study Course, just go to
http://www.speedseduction.net/products/rj87.asp
This newsletter, and all of its contents are copyright
2004, Ross Jeffries. However this newsletter may be
reprinted and re-used in any format, without prior
consent, provided all content, including all links,
are kept intact, proper credit for authorship is given, and the newsletter is given for free, without charge.
There's a common saying in street fighting that 95% of all
real fights wind up in a clinch and go to the ground. Could that
really be true? Frankly, I don't know. But I will say this: 95%
of the time, a woman will test you by the second date, or
sooner, to see:
1. If you'll take her bullshit.
2. How hungry you are for her attention (remember: those who
look hungry, never get fed)
3. Just how much control she can exert over you and/or the
relationship.
In this issue, I'd like to talk about how you can pass those
tests, and how to do some testing of your own. Believe me, this
is important. If you've ever been dumped for being "too nice",
or have been told, time and again, "let's just be friends", it's
because you haven't learned to recognize when you're being
tested or just haven't yet learned how to properly respond. You
thought you would get points for being "co-operative" and
"helpful", and instead you just got the fuzzy end of the
lollipop.
Why She Tests You: The Search For Strength And Certainty
Look: one of the primary things that women are looking for
from a man is security; the feeling that someone is stronger
than they are. When you put a woman in her place, when you set
rules and boundaries for her to follow, it lets her know she can
relax around you and feel comfortable and secure. This search
for strength is the single most important reason why she tests
you. The other factor is ambivalence, or what I call the "make
up my mind for me" syndrome.
You see, the sad reality is that often a woman just isn't
that interested in you one way or another. Maybe you aren't
exactly the physical type she goes for, maybe she just got
burned in a bad relationship, or there's some unseen competitor
who she's waiting to hear from. What ever her reasons, you can
tell this is happening when you hear something like, "Uh...well,
I'd like to go out with you Friday, but why don't you call me
late Friday afternoon and I'll let you know for sure?"
Finally, there is the fact that sometimes, modern women just
get overwhelmed with eighty billion things they are trying to do
at once. And, when overwhelmed, they flake on commitments that
occur during the peak of the overwhelm.
How To Handle It…Dealing From A Position Of Strength
To get back to street fighting analogies, there's a concept
from Jeet Kun Do, the fighting style of the late, great Bruce
Lee that basically says that any weapon thrust your way, as part
of an attack is just a convenient target to be destroyed. Coming
from this perspective, an attack, rather than something to be
feared, is just an unprecedented opportunity to.... KICK THE
OTHER GUY'S ASS!!!!
Just so, a woman's bullshit and tests are great
opportunities to establish respect and dramatically increase her
interest in you. In other words, your response to these tests,
instead of being, "Oh no.…why is she doing this? What did I do
wrong?", from now on will be.... AH, HAH! A RESPECT
OPPORTUNITY!!!
Look: your attitude has to be that every rude piece of
behavior, every silly test of hers is just an unprecedented
opportunity for you to establish respect, increase her interest,
and intensify her desire to please you. Taken from this
perspective, you'll be mentally prepared, and may even find
yourself actually looking forward to her trying to pull shit,
since you know it's your chance to get her really hot for
you!!!! Now, before we go on to some specific scenarios, let me
add one other thing: when you do put her in her place. ...
IT'S GOT TO COME FROM THE RIGHT PLACE IN YOU!!!
In other words, the macho idiot who loses control and
trashes the place when his girlfriend comes home ten minutes
late is definitely not the example to follow. All he's doing is
showing he can't control himself and he just earns the woman's
contempt. Notice I'm not saying you can't or shouldn't get a
little pissed. Just don't go nutso with a stream of obscenities.
(Streams of obscenities are for afterward, when you are in bed
with her.)
The other thing that doesn't work is acting like a hurt
little boy. Whining stuff like, "How could you do this to me?"
or, "But you promised!" won't cut it, good buddy. No. You have
to come from the calm, but firm "take it or leave it" position.
This is all part of displaying the critically important.........
WILLINGNESS TO WALK AWAY FROM HER!!!
You see, after years of experience and study, I've come to
the conclusion that a woman can only experience real passion for
you if on some level she believes she could do something to lose
you! Understand that when you show this willingness to walk
away, in any area of your life, it conveys the message that you
are the prize to be pursued, that you are the person of value,
and they had better take advantage of the opportunity. This is
an attitude that will move you forward in any area that's
challenging you.
By way of contrast, if you show a non-stop, forever and ever
devotion to her, and put up with her crap and ambivalence, then
where is that tension of knowing she could lose you? Answer:
nowhere! And that's why you get nowhere when you put up with
this kind of stuff! If you've seen an initially hot relationship
grow ice-cold, this is one big reason!!! Ok. On to some
scenarios.
Scenario one: You call to ask her out for the first time.
Her response is ambivalent, something like, "Well, I'd like to
but, why don't you call me later in the week and...." Here's
your response: "Let me ask you a question, point blank. Is going
out with me something you can take or leave or is it something
that you're smart enough that you really want to do that?" Then
shut the hell up and listen for her answer.
Now, what are you doing here? You're calling her on her
ambivalence and letting her know you don't have time to be put
on hold. And you're also suggesting she's stupid if she doesn't
grab this opportunity.
Finally, you're embedding a command (about which much more
later in other issues of this newsletter) that she really does
want to go out with you. Will this work? Very often it does.
It's not what she's expecting, and that always gets attention.
Just be as matter of fact and non-hostile as you can.
Understatement works best with this one. What if she still
hesitates? Well, say this one: You: Look. You have my number,
and I'm going to leave it up to you. And you know, if you don't
call it's going to be a loss for me, but maybe what you won't
realize until after you hang up is, that it'll be a loss for you
as well. Ok? Bye.
Scenario Two: She calls and cancels at the last minute
without offering to do it again at some specific time. (I've
heard every excuse in the book, my friend, from "My parakeet is
sick" to "I've got to shampoo the rug". Seriously)
Her: I can't make it. I've got a rare tropical disease
that's causing me to shrink by the hour.
You:(dead silence for as long as it takes for her to talk
again. Just say NOTHING!!!)
Her: Hello? Are you there? What's wrong?
You: What's wrong is I can't believe the bullshit I'm
hearing.
Her: What?????
You: Look...you made a commitment to spend time with me and
now you're blowing me off. You're disrespecting me and
disrespecting my time and I'm NOT going to put up with it. My
rule is, if someone makes a commitment to me, I expect them to
keep it. If they can't keep it, I need to know at least a day in
advance so I can make other plans. Got it? If you can live with
that rule, great...if not, sayonara!
Then, HANG UP!! Now, this may sound extreme, but man does it
work well!!! In fact, she'll probably call back with five
minutes and apologize and ask you out!!! I'm not kidding here;
I've seen the hardest, jaded bitches go to giggly little girls,
eager to please me when I've done this. It throws some kind of
switch in their heads. I guess with some people, you don't
really get their attention until...
You Give Them A Swift Kick In The Ass!!
Please note, I’m speaking of an attitude. I am NOT talking
about or in any way suggesting or condoning physical violence
with a woman. In fact, I am against the use or threat of the use
of violence or force against ANY human being, unless there is an
imminent threat of violence against yourself or a loved one. I
can’t make this too clear. I’m talking about using your mind,
NOT your fists.
Scenario Three: You go to pick her up at her place and she
either keeps you waiting outside for more than ten minutes, or
lets you in and then proceeds to talk on the phone for at least
that long while totally ignoring you. Wait for her to finish,
and as soon as she does say something like this:
YOU: Can I ask you a question?
HER: Sure.
YOU: Are you being intentionally rude to test me, or are you
just accidentally acting clueless?
HER:(mouth dropping open in shock, unable to say anything!)
YOU: Don't ever keep me waiting like this again, ok? I'll
always treat you respectfully, but I expect the same. Do you
understand me?
HER: Uh..uh...yes.
The point is this: when women throw this stuff your way, you
want to do the unexpected. Don’t put up with it, like a “nice
guy” and don’t lose your temper like a jerk. Walk a middle
ground of strength, self-control AND self-respect, and these
tests will become opportunities to power her straight into your
bed.
And that certainly beats a poke in the eye, doesn’t it?
‘Til next time,
Piece and peace
Ross
P.S. To order the amazing, life-changing, girl-getting Speed
Seduction(r) Home Study Course, just go to
http://www.speedseduction.net/products/rj87.asp
This newsletter, and all of its contents are copyright
2004, Ross Jeffries. However this newsletter may be
reprinted and re-used in any format, without prior
consent, provided all content, including all links,
are kept intact, proper credit for authorship is given, and the newsletter is given for free, without charge.
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
7 Tips To Supercharge Your Speed Seduction® Success!
Dear Speed Seduction® Student,
Part of learning any new technology is understanding some
basic principles. So here are some tips that I have found have
helped many clients with the initial Speed Seduction learning
curve. Remember, a huge part of Speed Seduction is learning to
use your language to...
Capture and Lead A Woman's Imagination and Emotions!
As I have taught again and again, whatever you can get a
person to imagine will be perceived by them to be their own
thought, and thus will not be resisted. Women especially like to
be led by their imagination and emotions! Then, and only then,
will they give you the behaviors (love, sex, etc) that you crave
and want. Remember, women want good feelings, and all of the
tools and language patterns in the Speed Seduction Home Study
course are geared toward either doing this or gathering the
information you need to do this.
Tip 1: The patterns are examples, NOT rules. Many students
think that unless they present the patterns to women, word for
word, that they won't work or get results. THIS IS JUST 100%
FALSE! The patterns are only examples..very GOOD examples..of
the kinds of communication that turn women on. They give you the
structure. But they aren't meant to be rigidly or exclusively
followed. Learn from them HOW they work, and you'll be able to
quickly create your own patterns.
Tip 2: Women enjoy the patterns, so forget about being
caught. So many beginning clients feel like they are doing
something wrong...a small minor crime like picking a pocket or
stealing a wrist-watch when they approach women to do the
patterns! Hey..the patterns are designed to make women feel
wonderful! At the very least you are brightening her day and
doing her a favor and at best turning her on unlike anyone else
ever has! So far from feeling bad, you ought to excited about
the gift you are giving her!
Tip 3: Practice the patterns out loud! The patterns are meant
to be SPOKEN, not read! You can't really master the tonality and
tempo unless you practice OUT LOUD! THIS STEP IS CRITICAL!
Tip 4: Take a little bit each day! Speed Seduction is like
learning a whole new language and a whole new way of thinking!
Be fair to yourself and master it all naturally as it comes!
Take your time and just do a little bit every day! You'll be
shocked at how much you master in just a few weeks time!
Tip 5: Pattern Flow Is Important! One of the most crucial
skills is knowing how to transition from one pattern to another!
In one letter, I explained how to make flash cards to quickly
learn how to flow from one pattern to the next! If you haven't
done that...DO IT NOW!
Tip 6: Understand The Conversational Set-ups! Patterns are
hard to use if you don't know how to introduce them and bring
them up in conversation! For each pattern you want to use you
ought to have at least two ways of bringing it up! I cover this
in several of the Newsletters, so if you haven't got them, all
the back issues are in the back of the workbook in the
Basic/Delux Home Study Course.
Tip 7: Practice Your Closing! So many guys have told me
they've run patterns but when it comes time to closing the
deal..they are stuck! Well, as I have said, if you want a
result, you've got to rehearse it! So prepare your closes in
advance so they flow from you naturally and without thought when
you need them! Along those lines, here are some EXCELLENT
closes:
Close #1: Why don't we continue this somewhere else and see
how much we can enjoy each others company?
Close #2: It's too bad you're not the type of person who can
imagine being together, feeling and doing all the things you
love to feel and do..for all the reasons that make sense to
you..but as you think about it just like that..doesn't it just
seem that spending some time together is something we have to
do?
Close #3: So..what steps would we have to take in order to
make sure we can talk again?
Close #4: I have an intuition..and I don't know if you can
imagine this as I describe it..that when we get a chance to talk
without time pressures or interruptions...we'll really enjoy
each others company..and I'm wondering if there's a number
where you feel comfortable having me call you.
Piece and Peace
Ross
P.S You can get your Speed Seduction® Home Study Course at:
http://www.speedseduction.net/products/rj87.asp
This newsletter, and all of its contents are copyright Ross Jeffries. However this newsletter may be reprinted and re-used in any format, without prior consent, provided all content, including all links, are kept intact, proper credit for authorship is given, and the newsletter is given for free, without charge.
Part of learning any new technology is understanding some
basic principles. So here are some tips that I have found have
helped many clients with the initial Speed Seduction learning
curve. Remember, a huge part of Speed Seduction is learning to
use your language to...
Capture and Lead A Woman's Imagination and Emotions!
As I have taught again and again, whatever you can get a
person to imagine will be perceived by them to be their own
thought, and thus will not be resisted. Women especially like to
be led by their imagination and emotions! Then, and only then,
will they give you the behaviors (love, sex, etc) that you crave
and want. Remember, women want good feelings, and all of the
tools and language patterns in the Speed Seduction Home Study
course are geared toward either doing this or gathering the
information you need to do this.
Tip 1: The patterns are examples, NOT rules. Many students
think that unless they present the patterns to women, word for
word, that they won't work or get results. THIS IS JUST 100%
FALSE! The patterns are only examples..very GOOD examples..of
the kinds of communication that turn women on. They give you the
structure. But they aren't meant to be rigidly or exclusively
followed. Learn from them HOW they work, and you'll be able to
quickly create your own patterns.
Tip 2: Women enjoy the patterns, so forget about being
caught. So many beginning clients feel like they are doing
something wrong...a small minor crime like picking a pocket or
stealing a wrist-watch when they approach women to do the
patterns! Hey..the patterns are designed to make women feel
wonderful! At the very least you are brightening her day and
doing her a favor and at best turning her on unlike anyone else
ever has! So far from feeling bad, you ought to excited about
the gift you are giving her!
Tip 3: Practice the patterns out loud! The patterns are meant
to be SPOKEN, not read! You can't really master the tonality and
tempo unless you practice OUT LOUD! THIS STEP IS CRITICAL!
Tip 4: Take a little bit each day! Speed Seduction is like
learning a whole new language and a whole new way of thinking!
Be fair to yourself and master it all naturally as it comes!
Take your time and just do a little bit every day! You'll be
shocked at how much you master in just a few weeks time!
Tip 5: Pattern Flow Is Important! One of the most crucial
skills is knowing how to transition from one pattern to another!
In one letter, I explained how to make flash cards to quickly
learn how to flow from one pattern to the next! If you haven't
done that...DO IT NOW!
Tip 6: Understand The Conversational Set-ups! Patterns are
hard to use if you don't know how to introduce them and bring
them up in conversation! For each pattern you want to use you
ought to have at least two ways of bringing it up! I cover this
in several of the Newsletters, so if you haven't got them, all
the back issues are in the back of the workbook in the
Basic/Delux Home Study Course.
Tip 7: Practice Your Closing! So many guys have told me
they've run patterns but when it comes time to closing the
deal..they are stuck! Well, as I have said, if you want a
result, you've got to rehearse it! So prepare your closes in
advance so they flow from you naturally and without thought when
you need them! Along those lines, here are some EXCELLENT
closes:
Close #1: Why don't we continue this somewhere else and see
how much we can enjoy each others company?
Close #2: It's too bad you're not the type of person who can
imagine being together, feeling and doing all the things you
love to feel and do..for all the reasons that make sense to
you..but as you think about it just like that..doesn't it just
seem that spending some time together is something we have to
do?
Close #3: So..what steps would we have to take in order to
make sure we can talk again?
Close #4: I have an intuition..and I don't know if you can
imagine this as I describe it..that when we get a chance to talk
without time pressures or interruptions...we'll really enjoy
each others company..and I'm wondering if there's a number
where you feel comfortable having me call you.
Piece and Peace
Ross
P.S You can get your Speed Seduction® Home Study Course at:
http://www.speedseduction.net/products/rj87.asp
This newsletter, and all of its contents are copyright Ross Jeffries. However this newsletter may be reprinted and re-used in any format, without prior consent, provided all content, including all links, are kept intact, proper credit for authorship is given, and the newsletter is given for free, without charge.
Friday, December 10, 2010
How To Meet Women, Anytime, Anywhere, Part I
Dear Speed Seduction® Student,
One of the most common questions I have gotten in my 11 years of teaching Speed Seduction® is: what are some good and easy ways to meet women?
Recently, someone sent me an email, where, among other things, he said, “I hate going to clubs and bars, and at 35 years old, I feel out of place in them anyway.”
Now, this is one of the most common questions I get. And it's good to see a guy up there in his 30's still pushing for what he really wants.
Personally, as a 45 year old geezer who is as close to ugly as you can get without getting your face banned by the FDA, I still go for and GET women in their mid 20's(occasionally I will pull a 21-22 year old) and I never set foot in clubs.
But clubs or not, there ARE master keys for a guy of any age, to be meeting women, anytime anywhere. And believe me, this skill IS important.
You see, so many guys who are fixated on one girl, convinced SHE is the woman of their dreams whom they must have would actually dump her in a heartbeat if they knew they could go out and meet 10 hot women that same day they were pining over their 'dream girl"(who probably isn't giving them any anyway).
Hey…I'm sorry if I seem flippant here. But the reality is, the skill of meeting women anytime, anywhere, is crucial to avoiding what I call..
Relationships By Default!
You see, it has long been a theory of mine that MOST men don’t really wind up with the woman they really want. For most men, "dating" is such a form of roll the dice/crap shoot/gambling that they usually wind up settling for the woman who accidentally was attracted to them instead of the woman or women they really want.
Does this sound familiar?
Hey-I'm sorry if this seems harsh to you, but I call 'em like I see 'em. (And wow, did this ever get me booed and even physically attacked when I used to spout it on talk shows way back in the early and mid 90's.
Anyway, enough rambling. What I'm about to introduce you to is light years ahead of anything else out there, primarily because IT DOES NOT RELY ON CANNED LINES.
Yes, lines can be useful. Yes, lines can work. And I'll even give you some that are actually quite good.
But the key to remember is, with any line, it is the ATTITUDE that will determine how well the line works.
The Incredible Power Of Attitudes And Approach Positions
Basically then, there are 4 different attitudes or "approach positions"
The first one I'd like to talk about is one of my very favorite, and I call it "the Blurt Out".
The Blurt Out pretty much is what it sounds like; you "blurt out" whatever is actually going through your mind when you first spot the lady who has your attention, without any "editing" on your part (Ok, here's an exception: if your first thought is, "Damn, I have to touch those breasts!" it's probably best NOT to blurt that out!!
What I like about the Blurt Out is that it is coming from a place of vulnerability and sincerity. It's almost like you are thinking out loud, so women tend to automatically react without suspicion and be much more open and friendly to your approach.
The Blurt Out also works because you are implying something about your confidence, without saying it. What you are implying is, "hey, I'm a sincere guy, with real guts. I'm telling you what I really think, and I'm putting my head on the chopping block and handing you the axe. Will you be a horrible person and a coward and chop my head off or will you be as cool as me and be open to talking?"
The Blurt Out tends to work best with women in motion; either women who are walking directly toward you or women with whom you are walking parallel/side to side.
Just as an example of the Blurt Out in action, I once met a very hot 24 year old Canadian chick. I was in a parking structure for a shopping mall. She was walking up the steps, as I was walking down.
As I passed her I blurted out exactly what I was thinking in that moment, which was, "Wow..you've got style to burn!" just as if I was thinking out loud. She turned around, walked back down the steps and SHE initiated the conversation and later invited me to go get a beer.
That's the key to this approach, again. Just blurt out whatever you are thinking when you see her. Even if your thoughts happen to be shy or fearful, express what you are thinking, as in, "I realized if I kept hesitating, I'd never get to meet you and I'd kick myself for a week. So I had to come up and say SOMETHING. I'm "Your Name Here"
Can you see how totally sincere and disarming this approach could be? Especially for very good looking women who keep having all sorts of bullshit thrown their way.
The Blurt Out Plus The Implied Compliment
With an implied compliment, you don't actually say that YOU think the woman in question is hot or stylish or beautiful. You just imply it by how you state it.
Here's an example: walking around an outdoor mall, I spotted a woman who just walked incredibly gracefully. So I walked beside her and said, "It's just that I really admire women who carry themselves with grace and power..so I had to say "Hi"."
See the implied compliment? I didn't say it directly, I implied it. I said I admired women with who carry themselves with grace and power. Since I was talking to her, that must mean I think that about her.
But HER mind had to fill in the blank and apply the compliment to herself. Since this was an ACTIVE process involving her own mind, it wasn't perceived as coming from an outsider, but rather something she herself thought. And so it goes in without resistance!
This is a sneaky way to communicate, but you'll learn a lot more about the power of implication to move the thoughts, imagination, and emotions of women in ways you can't yet dream possible!
Approach Position Two: Observation, Comment or Question
The second approach position or attitude is what I call the "observation, comment or question". You can combine these with a sense of humor or just do them straight up, and they work best in a setting where neither you or the woman is in motion, so you have some time to make your observation.
The biggest advantage with these is they are non-threatening and you don't have to rely on anything canned to fit the situation.
(By the way, when thinking of something to say, one of the key questions I'll ask myself is, "What can I notice, observe or intuit about this person that I can use to make a connection? A good way to send your mind in the right direction).
Observations, comments and questions of course depend on the situation ongoing, and I usually quickly follow them up with something funny, often a put-on(which is our third approach position or attitude, so we'll get there in a minute).
Real life example: I was in a gas station, filling up my car. The woman next to me was putting gas in her giant white Mercedes. I said, "How do you like your Mercedes?" (See..simple question!)
Her response, "I love it. How do you like your SAAB?"
Ok, she's answering back, so I know at least she's friendly. I said, "I like it."
Then I jumped right to a put-on, which is an easy thing to follow up any comment, observation or question.
I said, "It's too short."
She said, "What? The Mercedes. I think it's pretty long.
I said, "No, it's too short."
She said, "What is?"
I said,"Life…to hestitate…when you meet someone you think is incredibly attractive."
She smiled and said, "Thank you!"
I then playfully hit her on the shoulder and said, "I was talking about ME!"
This got MORE laughter and then names were exchanged, and shortly thereafter, phone numbers as well.
My point: observations, comments and questions can be followed up with almost anything and combined with almost anything.
A favorite question opener of mine actually combines a question with a compliment, as in, "Do you do a martial art? You carry yourself with discpline and elegance..it's a very rare and attractive trait."
By the way, when it comes to compliments to pick up women, I prefer to IMPLY them or combine them with a question and I prefer to strongly compliment a woman on how she moves or her "energy". For some reason these are lot more acceptable and less threatening and perceived as more sincere than direct comments
about her looks.
Approach Position 3: The Put-On
Now we come to my favorite "approach position" the put-on. The put-on is simply a humorous approach where you pretend something to get her attention. For example, if a woman is walking in my direction and is wearing a t-shirt with a logo or design, I will look confused, point at the shirt and say, "I don't get it".
Usually, the response is, "Don't get what?" To which I always say, "The shirt. What's it mean?"
At this point, I almost always get an explanation from her about the logo or symbol, to which my response is to pretend to disagree and argue in the most ridiculous way.
Example: sitting in a yogurt shop, a young lady with very large breasts walked in. She was wearing a tight t-shirt with a slogan that said, "Free the Afghans"!.
I pretended that I thought the shirt was about Afghan DOGS. You know..the shaggy haired, long-legged dogs you sometimes see accompanying models in photo shoots?
I said, "who is holding a bunch of dogs captive? Why do you want to free them? Do you want more dogs to be strays?"
She tried explaining, and I kept misunderstanding. Then I made a joke about being so good looking I didn't need to be smart. Then I introduced myself.
If you want a good idea of the overall attitude for this approach, think of Bugs Bunny. Or Groucho Marx. Or Leslie Nielsen from the "Police Squad" movies.
One more example of a put-on approach. I was sitting in a local café and seated behind me was a very attractive young Asian woman. I observed that she was thinking very hard, talking to herself, trying to figure out her economics book.
So I turned to her and said, as seriously as could, "Could I ask you not to think too loud? You look like a loud thinker, and I have very important writing to do."
My friend, who was sitting across from me said she couldn't stop looking at me after that and could not go back to studying! I turned to her a minute later and said, "Look…I asked you nicely not to think so loud! Don't make me call the management!"
At that point, SHE began a conversation.
There are many, many ways to enjoy a put on. And you can combine it with an observation as in this last example; my observation about this girl was that she really was, "thinking loud"-she was having trouble trying to figure out what she was reading and so she WAS talking to herself, internally, in her head, which is a way of "thinking loud".
Approach Position #4: Genuine Intuition
The final approach position is what I would call a genuine intuition. This is more rare and harder to do. But did you ever find yourself just looking at someone and you just KNEW that person? Like something deep inside you connected with something deep inside them and you just KNEW them?
In this case, when this happens, go with your intuition and tell them what you observe. It's close to an observation, but the difference with this position is, it really isn't something you could pick up with your physical 5 senses.
This is advanced stuff that will come in time, so I wouldn't worry about it for now. But as an example, I was once sitting in my favorite coffee place. As this beautiful blonde woman walked in the door, I saw an image of her on stage, singing. So as she walked by I just said, "How long have you been a singer?"
It totally blew her away. And a long conversation followed. So if you have a strong intuition, just run with it and give it a shot. It's a bit risky, but when it works it has an incredible impact.
Ok. That's it for this issue. Next we'll continue to take up this thread and tell you more great ways to meet women, anytime, anywhere. Until then,
Peace and piece,
Ross
P.S. Want real success and power with the women of your choice, instead of the women you have to settle for? Your Speed Seduction® Home Study Course is waiting for you! Just go to
http://www.speedseduction.net/products/rj87.asp today!
This newsletter, and all of its contents are copyright Ross Jeffries. However this newsletter may be reprinted and re-used in any format, without prior consent, provided all content, including all links, are kept intact, proper credit for authorship is given, and the newsletter is given for free, without charge.
One of the most common questions I have gotten in my 11 years of teaching Speed Seduction® is: what are some good and easy ways to meet women?
Recently, someone sent me an email, where, among other things, he said, “I hate going to clubs and bars, and at 35 years old, I feel out of place in them anyway.”
Now, this is one of the most common questions I get. And it's good to see a guy up there in his 30's still pushing for what he really wants.
Personally, as a 45 year old geezer who is as close to ugly as you can get without getting your face banned by the FDA, I still go for and GET women in their mid 20's(occasionally I will pull a 21-22 year old) and I never set foot in clubs.
But clubs or not, there ARE master keys for a guy of any age, to be meeting women, anytime anywhere. And believe me, this skill IS important.
You see, so many guys who are fixated on one girl, convinced SHE is the woman of their dreams whom they must have would actually dump her in a heartbeat if they knew they could go out and meet 10 hot women that same day they were pining over their 'dream girl"(who probably isn't giving them any anyway).
Hey…I'm sorry if I seem flippant here. But the reality is, the skill of meeting women anytime, anywhere, is crucial to avoiding what I call..
Relationships By Default!
You see, it has long been a theory of mine that MOST men don’t really wind up with the woman they really want. For most men, "dating" is such a form of roll the dice/crap shoot/gambling that they usually wind up settling for the woman who accidentally was attracted to them instead of the woman or women they really want.
Does this sound familiar?
Hey-I'm sorry if this seems harsh to you, but I call 'em like I see 'em. (And wow, did this ever get me booed and even physically attacked when I used to spout it on talk shows way back in the early and mid 90's.
Anyway, enough rambling. What I'm about to introduce you to is light years ahead of anything else out there, primarily because IT DOES NOT RELY ON CANNED LINES.
Yes, lines can be useful. Yes, lines can work. And I'll even give you some that are actually quite good.
But the key to remember is, with any line, it is the ATTITUDE that will determine how well the line works.
The Incredible Power Of Attitudes And Approach Positions
Basically then, there are 4 different attitudes or "approach positions"
The first one I'd like to talk about is one of my very favorite, and I call it "the Blurt Out".
The Blurt Out pretty much is what it sounds like; you "blurt out" whatever is actually going through your mind when you first spot the lady who has your attention, without any "editing" on your part (Ok, here's an exception: if your first thought is, "Damn, I have to touch those breasts!" it's probably best NOT to blurt that out!!
What I like about the Blurt Out is that it is coming from a place of vulnerability and sincerity. It's almost like you are thinking out loud, so women tend to automatically react without suspicion and be much more open and friendly to your approach.
The Blurt Out also works because you are implying something about your confidence, without saying it. What you are implying is, "hey, I'm a sincere guy, with real guts. I'm telling you what I really think, and I'm putting my head on the chopping block and handing you the axe. Will you be a horrible person and a coward and chop my head off or will you be as cool as me and be open to talking?"
The Blurt Out tends to work best with women in motion; either women who are walking directly toward you or women with whom you are walking parallel/side to side.
Just as an example of the Blurt Out in action, I once met a very hot 24 year old Canadian chick. I was in a parking structure for a shopping mall. She was walking up the steps, as I was walking down.
As I passed her I blurted out exactly what I was thinking in that moment, which was, "Wow..you've got style to burn!" just as if I was thinking out loud. She turned around, walked back down the steps and SHE initiated the conversation and later invited me to go get a beer.
That's the key to this approach, again. Just blurt out whatever you are thinking when you see her. Even if your thoughts happen to be shy or fearful, express what you are thinking, as in, "I realized if I kept hesitating, I'd never get to meet you and I'd kick myself for a week. So I had to come up and say SOMETHING. I'm "Your Name Here"
Can you see how totally sincere and disarming this approach could be? Especially for very good looking women who keep having all sorts of bullshit thrown their way.
The Blurt Out Plus The Implied Compliment
With an implied compliment, you don't actually say that YOU think the woman in question is hot or stylish or beautiful. You just imply it by how you state it.
Here's an example: walking around an outdoor mall, I spotted a woman who just walked incredibly gracefully. So I walked beside her and said, "It's just that I really admire women who carry themselves with grace and power..so I had to say "Hi"."
See the implied compliment? I didn't say it directly, I implied it. I said I admired women with who carry themselves with grace and power. Since I was talking to her, that must mean I think that about her.
But HER mind had to fill in the blank and apply the compliment to herself. Since this was an ACTIVE process involving her own mind, it wasn't perceived as coming from an outsider, but rather something she herself thought. And so it goes in without resistance!
This is a sneaky way to communicate, but you'll learn a lot more about the power of implication to move the thoughts, imagination, and emotions of women in ways you can't yet dream possible!
Approach Position Two: Observation, Comment or Question
The second approach position or attitude is what I call the "observation, comment or question". You can combine these with a sense of humor or just do them straight up, and they work best in a setting where neither you or the woman is in motion, so you have some time to make your observation.
The biggest advantage with these is they are non-threatening and you don't have to rely on anything canned to fit the situation.
(By the way, when thinking of something to say, one of the key questions I'll ask myself is, "What can I notice, observe or intuit about this person that I can use to make a connection? A good way to send your mind in the right direction).
Observations, comments and questions of course depend on the situation ongoing, and I usually quickly follow them up with something funny, often a put-on(which is our third approach position or attitude, so we'll get there in a minute).
Real life example: I was in a gas station, filling up my car. The woman next to me was putting gas in her giant white Mercedes. I said, "How do you like your Mercedes?" (See..simple question!)
Her response, "I love it. How do you like your SAAB?"
Ok, she's answering back, so I know at least she's friendly. I said, "I like it."
Then I jumped right to a put-on, which is an easy thing to follow up any comment, observation or question.
I said, "It's too short."
She said, "What? The Mercedes. I think it's pretty long.
I said, "No, it's too short."
She said, "What is?"
I said,"Life…to hestitate…when you meet someone you think is incredibly attractive."
She smiled and said, "Thank you!"
I then playfully hit her on the shoulder and said, "I was talking about ME!"
This got MORE laughter and then names were exchanged, and shortly thereafter, phone numbers as well.
My point: observations, comments and questions can be followed up with almost anything and combined with almost anything.
A favorite question opener of mine actually combines a question with a compliment, as in, "Do you do a martial art? You carry yourself with discpline and elegance..it's a very rare and attractive trait."
By the way, when it comes to compliments to pick up women, I prefer to IMPLY them or combine them with a question and I prefer to strongly compliment a woman on how she moves or her "energy". For some reason these are lot more acceptable and less threatening and perceived as more sincere than direct comments
about her looks.
Approach Position 3: The Put-On
Now we come to my favorite "approach position" the put-on. The put-on is simply a humorous approach where you pretend something to get her attention. For example, if a woman is walking in my direction and is wearing a t-shirt with a logo or design, I will look confused, point at the shirt and say, "I don't get it".
Usually, the response is, "Don't get what?" To which I always say, "The shirt. What's it mean?"
At this point, I almost always get an explanation from her about the logo or symbol, to which my response is to pretend to disagree and argue in the most ridiculous way.
Example: sitting in a yogurt shop, a young lady with very large breasts walked in. She was wearing a tight t-shirt with a slogan that said, "Free the Afghans"!.
I pretended that I thought the shirt was about Afghan DOGS. You know..the shaggy haired, long-legged dogs you sometimes see accompanying models in photo shoots?
I said, "who is holding a bunch of dogs captive? Why do you want to free them? Do you want more dogs to be strays?"
She tried explaining, and I kept misunderstanding. Then I made a joke about being so good looking I didn't need to be smart. Then I introduced myself.
If you want a good idea of the overall attitude for this approach, think of Bugs Bunny. Or Groucho Marx. Or Leslie Nielsen from the "Police Squad" movies.
One more example of a put-on approach. I was sitting in a local café and seated behind me was a very attractive young Asian woman. I observed that she was thinking very hard, talking to herself, trying to figure out her economics book.
So I turned to her and said, as seriously as could, "Could I ask you not to think too loud? You look like a loud thinker, and I have very important writing to do."
My friend, who was sitting across from me said she couldn't stop looking at me after that and could not go back to studying! I turned to her a minute later and said, "Look…I asked you nicely not to think so loud! Don't make me call the management!"
At that point, SHE began a conversation.
There are many, many ways to enjoy a put on. And you can combine it with an observation as in this last example; my observation about this girl was that she really was, "thinking loud"-she was having trouble trying to figure out what she was reading and so she WAS talking to herself, internally, in her head, which is a way of "thinking loud".
Approach Position #4: Genuine Intuition
The final approach position is what I would call a genuine intuition. This is more rare and harder to do. But did you ever find yourself just looking at someone and you just KNEW that person? Like something deep inside you connected with something deep inside them and you just KNEW them?
In this case, when this happens, go with your intuition and tell them what you observe. It's close to an observation, but the difference with this position is, it really isn't something you could pick up with your physical 5 senses.
This is advanced stuff that will come in time, so I wouldn't worry about it for now. But as an example, I was once sitting in my favorite coffee place. As this beautiful blonde woman walked in the door, I saw an image of her on stage, singing. So as she walked by I just said, "How long have you been a singer?"
It totally blew her away. And a long conversation followed. So if you have a strong intuition, just run with it and give it a shot. It's a bit risky, but when it works it has an incredible impact.
Ok. That's it for this issue. Next we'll continue to take up this thread and tell you more great ways to meet women, anytime, anywhere. Until then,
Peace and piece,
Ross
P.S. Want real success and power with the women of your choice, instead of the women you have to settle for? Your Speed Seduction® Home Study Course is waiting for you! Just go to
http://www.speedseduction.net/products/rj87.asp today!
This newsletter, and all of its contents are copyright Ross Jeffries. However this newsletter may be reprinted and re-used in any format, without prior consent, provided all content, including all links, are kept intact, proper credit for authorship is given, and the newsletter is given for free, without charge.
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
How To Meet Women, Anytime, Anywhere, Part I
Dear Speed Seduction® Student,
One of the most common questions I have gotten in my 11 years of teaching Speed Seduction® is: what are some good and easy ways to meet women?
Recently, someone sent me an email, where, among other things, he said, “I hate going to clubs and bars, and at 35 years old, I feel out of place in them anyway.”
Now, this is one of the most common questions I get. And it's good to see a guy up there in his 30's still pushing for what he really wants.
Personally, as a 45 year old geezer who is as close to ugly as you can get without getting your face banned by the FDA, I still go for and GET women in their mid 20's(occasionally I will pull a 21-22 year old) and I never set foot in clubs.
But clubs or not, there ARE master keys for a guy of any age, to be meeting women, anytime anywhere. And believe me, this skill IS important.
You see, so many guys who are fixated on one girl, convinced SHE is the woman of their dreams whom they must have would actually dump her in a heartbeat if they knew they could go out and meet 10 hot women that same day they were pining over their 'dream girl"(who probably isn't giving them any anyway).
Hey…I'm sorry if I seem flippant here. But the reality is, the skill of meeting women anytime, anywhere, is crucial to avoiding what I call..
Relationships By Default!
You see, it has long been a theory of mine that MOST men don’t really wind up with the woman they really want. For most men, "dating" is such a form of roll the dice/crap shoot/gambling that they usually wind up settling for the woman who accidentally was attracted to them instead of the woman or women they really want.
Does this sound familiar?
Hey-I'm sorry if this seems harsh to you, but I call 'em like I see 'em. (And wow, did this ever get me booed and even physically attacked when I used to spout it on talk shows way back in the early and mid 90's.
Anyway, enough rambling. What I'm about to introduce you to is light years ahead of anything else out there, primarily because IT DOES NOT RELY ON CANNED LINES.
Yes, lines can be useful. Yes, lines can work. And I'll even give you some that are actually quite good.
But the key to remember is, with any line, it is the ATTITUDE that will determine how well the line works.
The Incredible Power Of Attitudes And Approach Positions
Basically then, there are 4 different attitudes or "approach positions"
The first one I'd like to talk about is one of my very favorite, and I call it "the Blurt Out".
The Blurt Out pretty much is what it sounds like; you "blurt out" whatever is actually going through your mind when you first spot the lady who has your attention, without any "editing" on your part (Ok, here's an exception: if your first thought is, "Damn, I have to touch those breasts!" it's probably best NOT to blurt that out!!
What I like about the Blurt Out is that it is coming from a place of vulnerability and sincerity. It's almost like you are thinking out loud, so women tend to automatically react without suspicion and be much more open and friendly to your approach.
The Blurt Out also works because you are implying something about your confidence, without saying it. What you are implying is, "hey, I'm a sincere guy, with real guts. I'm telling you what I really think, and I'm putting my head on the chopping block and handing you the axe. Will you be a horrible person and a coward and chop my head off or will you be as cool as me and be open to talking?"
The Blurt Out tends to work best with women in motion; either women who are walking directly toward you or women with whom you are walking parallel/side to side.
Just as an example of the Blurt Out in action, I once met a very hot 24 year old Canadian chick. I was in a parking structure for a shopping mall. She was walking up the steps, as I was walking down.
As I passed her I blurted out exactly what I was thinking in that moment, which was, "Wow..you've got style to burn!" just as if I was thinking out loud. She turned around, walked back down the steps and SHE initiated the conversation and later invited me to go get a beer.
That's the key to this approach, again. Just blurt out whatever you are thinking when you see her. Even if your thoughts happen to be shy or fearful, express what you are thinking, as in, "I realized if I kept hesitating, I'd never get to meet you and I'd kick myself for a week. So I had to come up and say SOMETHING. I'm "Your Name Here"
Can you see how totally sincere and disarming this approach could be? Especially for very good looking women who keep having all sorts of bullshit thrown their way.
The Blurt Out Plus The Implied Compliment
With an implied compliment, you don't actually say that YOU think the woman in question is hot or stylish or beautiful. You just imply it by how you state it.
Here's an example: walking around an outdoor mall, I spotted a woman who just walked incredibly gracefully. So I walked beside her and said, "It's just that I really admire women who carry themselves with grace and power..so I had to say "Hi"."
See the implied compliment? I didn't say it directly, I implied it. I said I admired women with who carry themselves with grace and power. Since I was talking to her, that must mean I think that about her.
But HER mind had to fill in the blank and apply the compliment to herself. Since this was an ACTIVE process involving her own mind, it wasn't perceived as coming from an outsider, but rather something she herself thought. And so it goes in without resistance!
This is a sneaky way to communicate, but you'll learn a lot more about the power of implication to move the thoughts, imagination, and emotions of women in ways you can't yet dream possible!
Approach Position Two: Observation, Comment or Question
The second approach position or attitude is what I call the "observation, comment or question". You can combine these with a sense of humor or just do them straight up, and they work best in a setting where neither you or the woman is in motion, so you have some time to make your observation.
The biggest advantage with these is they are non-threatening and you don't have to rely on anything canned to fit the situation.
(By the way, when thinking of something to say, one of the key questions I'll ask myself is, "What can I notice, observe or intuit about this person that I can use to make a connection? A good way to send your mind in the right direction).
Observations, comments and questions of course depend on the situation ongoing, and I usually quickly follow them up with something funny, often a put-on(which is our third approach position or attitude, so we'll get there in a minute).
Real life example: I was in a gas station, filling up my car. The woman next to me was putting gas in her giant white Mercedes. I said, "How do you like your Mercedes?" (See..simple question!)
Her response, "I love it. How do you like your SAAB?"
Ok, she's answering back, so I know at least she's friendly. I said, "I like it."
Then I jumped right to a put-on, which is an easy thing to follow up any comment, observation or question.
I said, "It's too short."
She said, "What? The Mercedes. I think it's pretty long.
I said, "No, it's too short."
She said, "What is?"
I said,"Life…to hestitate…when you meet someone you think is incredibly attractive."
She smiled and said, "Thank you!"
I then playfully hit her on the shoulder and said, "I was talking about ME!"
This got MORE laughter and then names were exchanged, and shortly thereafter, phone numbers as well.
My point: observations, comments and questions can be followed up with almost anything and combined with almost anything.
A favorite question opener of mine actually combines a question with a compliment, as in, "Do you do a martial art? You carry yourself with discpline and elegance..it's a very rare and attractive trait."
By the way, when it comes to compliments to pick up women, I prefer to IMPLY them or combine them with a question and I prefer to strongly compliment a woman on how she moves or her "energy". For some reason these are lot more acceptable and less threatening and perceived as more sincere than direct comments
about her looks.
Approach Position 3: The Put-On
Now we come to my favorite "approach position" the put-on. The put-on is simply a humorous approach where you pretend something to get her attention. For example, if a woman is walking in my direction and is wearing a t-shirt with a logo or design, I will look confused, point at the shirt and say, "I don't get it".
Usually, the response is, "Don't get what?" To which I always say, "The shirt. What's it mean?"
At this point, I almost always get an explanation from her about the logo or symbol, to which my response is to pretend to disagree and argue in the most ridiculous way.
Example: sitting in a yogurt shop, a young lady with very large breasts walked in. She was wearing a tight t-shirt with a slogan that said, "Free the Afghans"!.
I pretended that I thought the shirt was about Afghan DOGS. You know..the shaggy haired, long-legged dogs you sometimes see accompanying models in photo shoots?
I said, "who is holding a bunch of dogs captive? Why do you want to free them? Do you want more dogs to be strays?"
She tried explaining, and I kept misunderstanding. Then I made a joke about being so good looking I didn't need to be smart. Then I introduced myself.
If you want a good idea of the overall attitude for this approach, think of Bugs Bunny. Or Groucho Marx. Or Leslie Nielsen from the "Police Squad" movies.
One more example of a put-on approach. I was sitting in a local café and seated behind me was a very attractive young Asian woman. I observed that she was thinking very hard, talking to herself, trying to figure out her economics book.
So I turned to her and said, as seriously as could, "Could I ask you not to think too loud? You look like a loud thinker, and I have very important writing to do."
My friend, who was sitting across from me said she couldn't stop looking at me after that and could not go back to studying! I turned to her a minute later and said, "Look…I asked you nicely not to think so loud! Don't make me call the management!"
At that point, SHE began a conversation.
There are many, many ways to enjoy a put on. And you can combine it with an observation as in this last example; my observation about this girl was that she really was, "thinking loud"-she was having trouble trying to figure out what she was reading and so she WAS talking to herself, internally, in her head, which is a way of "thinking loud".
Approach Position #4: Genuine Intuition
The final approach position is what I would call a genuine intuition. This is more rare and harder to do. But did you ever find yourself just looking at someone and you just KNEW that person? Like something deep inside you connected with something deep inside them and you just KNEW them?
In this case, when this happens, go with your intuition and tell them what you observe. It's close to an observation, but the difference with this position is, it really isn't something you could pick up with your physical 5 senses.
This is advanced stuff that will come in time, so I wouldn't worry about it for now. But as an example, I was once sitting in my favorite coffee place. As this beautiful blonde woman walked in the door, I saw an image of her on stage, singing. So as she walked by I just said, "How long have you been a singer?"
It totally blew her away. And a long conversation followed. So if you have a strong intuition, just run with it and give it a shot. It's a bit risky, but when it works it has an incredible impact.
Ok. That's it for this issue. Next we'll continue to take up this thread and tell you more great ways to meet women, anytime, anywhere. Until then,
Peace and piece,
Ross
P.S. Want real success and power with the women of your choice, instead of the women you have to settle for? Your Speed Seduction® Home Study Course is waiting for you! Just go to
http://www.speedseduction.net/products/rj87.asp today!
This newsletter, and all of its contents are copyright Ross Jeffries. However this newsletter may be reprinted and re-used in any format, without prior consent, provided all content, including all links, are kept intact, proper credit for authorship is given, and the newsletter is given for free, without charge.
One of the most common questions I have gotten in my 11 years of teaching Speed Seduction® is: what are some good and easy ways to meet women?
Recently, someone sent me an email, where, among other things, he said, “I hate going to clubs and bars, and at 35 years old, I feel out of place in them anyway.”
Now, this is one of the most common questions I get. And it's good to see a guy up there in his 30's still pushing for what he really wants.
Personally, as a 45 year old geezer who is as close to ugly as you can get without getting your face banned by the FDA, I still go for and GET women in their mid 20's(occasionally I will pull a 21-22 year old) and I never set foot in clubs.
But clubs or not, there ARE master keys for a guy of any age, to be meeting women, anytime anywhere. And believe me, this skill IS important.
You see, so many guys who are fixated on one girl, convinced SHE is the woman of their dreams whom they must have would actually dump her in a heartbeat if they knew they could go out and meet 10 hot women that same day they were pining over their 'dream girl"(who probably isn't giving them any anyway).
Hey…I'm sorry if I seem flippant here. But the reality is, the skill of meeting women anytime, anywhere, is crucial to avoiding what I call..
Relationships By Default!
You see, it has long been a theory of mine that MOST men don’t really wind up with the woman they really want. For most men, "dating" is such a form of roll the dice/crap shoot/gambling that they usually wind up settling for the woman who accidentally was attracted to them instead of the woman or women they really want.
Does this sound familiar?
Hey-I'm sorry if this seems harsh to you, but I call 'em like I see 'em. (And wow, did this ever get me booed and even physically attacked when I used to spout it on talk shows way back in the early and mid 90's.
Anyway, enough rambling. What I'm about to introduce you to is light years ahead of anything else out there, primarily because IT DOES NOT RELY ON CANNED LINES.
Yes, lines can be useful. Yes, lines can work. And I'll even give you some that are actually quite good.
But the key to remember is, with any line, it is the ATTITUDE that will determine how well the line works.
The Incredible Power Of Attitudes And Approach Positions
Basically then, there are 4 different attitudes or "approach positions"
The first one I'd like to talk about is one of my very favorite, and I call it "the Blurt Out".
The Blurt Out pretty much is what it sounds like; you "blurt out" whatever is actually going through your mind when you first spot the lady who has your attention, without any "editing" on your part (Ok, here's an exception: if your first thought is, "Damn, I have to touch those breasts!" it's probably best NOT to blurt that out!!
What I like about the Blurt Out is that it is coming from a place of vulnerability and sincerity. It's almost like you are thinking out loud, so women tend to automatically react without suspicion and be much more open and friendly to your approach.
The Blurt Out also works because you are implying something about your confidence, without saying it. What you are implying is, "hey, I'm a sincere guy, with real guts. I'm telling you what I really think, and I'm putting my head on the chopping block and handing you the axe. Will you be a horrible person and a coward and chop my head off or will you be as cool as me and be open to talking?"
The Blurt Out tends to work best with women in motion; either women who are walking directly toward you or women with whom you are walking parallel/side to side.
Just as an example of the Blurt Out in action, I once met a very hot 24 year old Canadian chick. I was in a parking structure for a shopping mall. She was walking up the steps, as I was walking down.
As I passed her I blurted out exactly what I was thinking in that moment, which was, "Wow..you've got style to burn!" just as if I was thinking out loud. She turned around, walked back down the steps and SHE initiated the conversation and later invited me to go get a beer.
That's the key to this approach, again. Just blurt out whatever you are thinking when you see her. Even if your thoughts happen to be shy or fearful, express what you are thinking, as in, "I realized if I kept hesitating, I'd never get to meet you and I'd kick myself for a week. So I had to come up and say SOMETHING. I'm "Your Name Here"
Can you see how totally sincere and disarming this approach could be? Especially for very good looking women who keep having all sorts of bullshit thrown their way.
The Blurt Out Plus The Implied Compliment
With an implied compliment, you don't actually say that YOU think the woman in question is hot or stylish or beautiful. You just imply it by how you state it.
Here's an example: walking around an outdoor mall, I spotted a woman who just walked incredibly gracefully. So I walked beside her and said, "It's just that I really admire women who carry themselves with grace and power..so I had to say "Hi"."
See the implied compliment? I didn't say it directly, I implied it. I said I admired women with who carry themselves with grace and power. Since I was talking to her, that must mean I think that about her.
But HER mind had to fill in the blank and apply the compliment to herself. Since this was an ACTIVE process involving her own mind, it wasn't perceived as coming from an outsider, but rather something she herself thought. And so it goes in without resistance!
This is a sneaky way to communicate, but you'll learn a lot more about the power of implication to move the thoughts, imagination, and emotions of women in ways you can't yet dream possible!
Approach Position Two: Observation, Comment or Question
The second approach position or attitude is what I call the "observation, comment or question". You can combine these with a sense of humor or just do them straight up, and they work best in a setting where neither you or the woman is in motion, so you have some time to make your observation.
The biggest advantage with these is they are non-threatening and you don't have to rely on anything canned to fit the situation.
(By the way, when thinking of something to say, one of the key questions I'll ask myself is, "What can I notice, observe or intuit about this person that I can use to make a connection? A good way to send your mind in the right direction).
Observations, comments and questions of course depend on the situation ongoing, and I usually quickly follow them up with something funny, often a put-on(which is our third approach position or attitude, so we'll get there in a minute).
Real life example: I was in a gas station, filling up my car. The woman next to me was putting gas in her giant white Mercedes. I said, "How do you like your Mercedes?" (See..simple question!)
Her response, "I love it. How do you like your SAAB?"
Ok, she's answering back, so I know at least she's friendly. I said, "I like it."
Then I jumped right to a put-on, which is an easy thing to follow up any comment, observation or question.
I said, "It's too short."
She said, "What? The Mercedes. I think it's pretty long.
I said, "No, it's too short."
She said, "What is?"
I said,"Life…to hestitate…when you meet someone you think is incredibly attractive."
She smiled and said, "Thank you!"
I then playfully hit her on the shoulder and said, "I was talking about ME!"
This got MORE laughter and then names were exchanged, and shortly thereafter, phone numbers as well.
My point: observations, comments and questions can be followed up with almost anything and combined with almost anything.
A favorite question opener of mine actually combines a question with a compliment, as in, "Do you do a martial art? You carry yourself with discpline and elegance..it's a very rare and attractive trait."
By the way, when it comes to compliments to pick up women, I prefer to IMPLY them or combine them with a question and I prefer to strongly compliment a woman on how she moves or her "energy". For some reason these are lot more acceptable and less threatening and perceived as more sincere than direct comments
about her looks.
Approach Position 3: The Put-On
Now we come to my favorite "approach position" the put-on. The put-on is simply a humorous approach where you pretend something to get her attention. For example, if a woman is walking in my direction and is wearing a t-shirt with a logo or design, I will look confused, point at the shirt and say, "I don't get it".
Usually, the response is, "Don't get what?" To which I always say, "The shirt. What's it mean?"
At this point, I almost always get an explanation from her about the logo or symbol, to which my response is to pretend to disagree and argue in the most ridiculous way.
Example: sitting in a yogurt shop, a young lady with very large breasts walked in. She was wearing a tight t-shirt with a slogan that said, "Free the Afghans"!.
I pretended that I thought the shirt was about Afghan DOGS. You know..the shaggy haired, long-legged dogs you sometimes see accompanying models in photo shoots?
I said, "who is holding a bunch of dogs captive? Why do you want to free them? Do you want more dogs to be strays?"
She tried explaining, and I kept misunderstanding. Then I made a joke about being so good looking I didn't need to be smart. Then I introduced myself.
If you want a good idea of the overall attitude for this approach, think of Bugs Bunny. Or Groucho Marx. Or Leslie Nielsen from the "Police Squad" movies.
One more example of a put-on approach. I was sitting in a local café and seated behind me was a very attractive young Asian woman. I observed that she was thinking very hard, talking to herself, trying to figure out her economics book.
So I turned to her and said, as seriously as could, "Could I ask you not to think too loud? You look like a loud thinker, and I have very important writing to do."
My friend, who was sitting across from me said she couldn't stop looking at me after that and could not go back to studying! I turned to her a minute later and said, "Look…I asked you nicely not to think so loud! Don't make me call the management!"
At that point, SHE began a conversation.
There are many, many ways to enjoy a put on. And you can combine it with an observation as in this last example; my observation about this girl was that she really was, "thinking loud"-she was having trouble trying to figure out what she was reading and so she WAS talking to herself, internally, in her head, which is a way of "thinking loud".
Approach Position #4: Genuine Intuition
The final approach position is what I would call a genuine intuition. This is more rare and harder to do. But did you ever find yourself just looking at someone and you just KNEW that person? Like something deep inside you connected with something deep inside them and you just KNEW them?
In this case, when this happens, go with your intuition and tell them what you observe. It's close to an observation, but the difference with this position is, it really isn't something you could pick up with your physical 5 senses.
This is advanced stuff that will come in time, so I wouldn't worry about it for now. But as an example, I was once sitting in my favorite coffee place. As this beautiful blonde woman walked in the door, I saw an image of her on stage, singing. So as she walked by I just said, "How long have you been a singer?"
It totally blew her away. And a long conversation followed. So if you have a strong intuition, just run with it and give it a shot. It's a bit risky, but when it works it has an incredible impact.
Ok. That's it for this issue. Next we'll continue to take up this thread and tell you more great ways to meet women, anytime, anywhere. Until then,
Peace and piece,
Ross
P.S. Want real success and power with the women of your choice, instead of the women you have to settle for? Your Speed Seduction® Home Study Course is waiting for you! Just go to
http://www.speedseduction.net/products/rj87.asp today!
This newsletter, and all of its contents are copyright Ross Jeffries. However this newsletter may be reprinted and re-used in any format, without prior consent, provided all content, including all links, are kept intact, proper credit for authorship is given, and the newsletter is given for free, without charge.
Monday, August 9, 2010
Assertiveness Part 3
Communication skills are a KEY to being assertive. Become AWARE of:
WHAT YOU SAY
* Be Specific, not general. "I have taken on more responsibilities - purchasing and supervising - and I think I should be compensated accordingly". NOT "You should give me a raise"
* Stay calm, becoming emotional or bringing up the past is counterproductive, i.e., "I had to ask for a raise last year too."
HOW YOU SAY IT
* Be steady. If you voice is too soft, whiny, shaky, sarcastic or threatening, you will not come across well.
* Use "I feel" rather than "You are" in your statements. I feel angry when you do not call to say you are going to be late." NOT " You are such a thoughtless jerk!"
WHERE AND WHEN TO SAY IT
It is best to be assertive most of the time. And some times and places are not appropriate.
The Classic, It is best to confront someone in private rather than in front of people.
It is common courtesy to discuss sensitive issues in private.
KEEPING THE FOLLOWING 4 POINTS IN MIND WILL ASSIST YOU TO INCREASE YOU ASSERTIVENESS
1. Use confident body language
-- Look the person straight in the eye, do not look down or away
-- Keep your body straight, do not slouch.
-- Keep your hands at your sides or in your lap. Do not tap on the table, fiddle with your hair or jewelry, fold your hands across your chest, or point your finger at the other person.
2. Be a good listener
-- Give your full attention to the person who is speaking.
-- Show your interest by responding. Do not simply nod you head in agreement.
-- Briefly summarize in your own words what the person said. It helps eliminate misunderstanding.
3. Respect yourself
-- Realize that you are worthy and have something to offer. Your ideas are important and others can benefit from them.
Evaluate your strengths and weaknesses.
Recognize those things you do well. Do not discount them because they are easy for you.
Take gradual steps toward overcoming your weaknesses. Reward yourself as you improve.
4. Respect Others
+ Everybody has the right to express feelings and opinions.
+ Realize the difference between assertion and aggression. Keep each clear. There is no need to threaten, punish or false influence other people. If you treat them with respect, they will treat you with respect.
YOUR RELATIONSHIPS WILL BE STRONGER, HEALTHIER AND MORE ENJOYABLE WHEN THEY ARE BASED ON MUTUAL RESPECT.
WHAT YOU SAY
* Be Specific, not general. "I have taken on more responsibilities - purchasing and supervising - and I think I should be compensated accordingly". NOT "You should give me a raise"
* Stay calm, becoming emotional or bringing up the past is counterproductive, i.e., "I had to ask for a raise last year too."
HOW YOU SAY IT
* Be steady. If you voice is too soft, whiny, shaky, sarcastic or threatening, you will not come across well.
* Use "I feel" rather than "You are" in your statements. I feel angry when you do not call to say you are going to be late." NOT " You are such a thoughtless jerk!"
WHERE AND WHEN TO SAY IT
It is best to be assertive most of the time. And some times and places are not appropriate.
The Classic, It is best to confront someone in private rather than in front of people.
It is common courtesy to discuss sensitive issues in private.
KEEPING THE FOLLOWING 4 POINTS IN MIND WILL ASSIST YOU TO INCREASE YOU ASSERTIVENESS
1. Use confident body language
-- Look the person straight in the eye, do not look down or away
-- Keep your body straight, do not slouch.
-- Keep your hands at your sides or in your lap. Do not tap on the table, fiddle with your hair or jewelry, fold your hands across your chest, or point your finger at the other person.
2. Be a good listener
-- Give your full attention to the person who is speaking.
-- Show your interest by responding. Do not simply nod you head in agreement.
-- Briefly summarize in your own words what the person said. It helps eliminate misunderstanding.
3. Respect yourself
-- Realize that you are worthy and have something to offer. Your ideas are important and others can benefit from them.
Evaluate your strengths and weaknesses.
Recognize those things you do well. Do not discount them because they are easy for you.
Take gradual steps toward overcoming your weaknesses. Reward yourself as you improve.
4. Respect Others
+ Everybody has the right to express feelings and opinions.
+ Realize the difference between assertion and aggression. Keep each clear. There is no need to threaten, punish or false influence other people. If you treat them with respect, they will treat you with respect.
YOUR RELATIONSHIPS WILL BE STRONGER, HEALTHIER AND MORE ENJOYABLE WHEN THEY ARE BASED ON MUTUAL RESPECT.
Monday, March 8, 2010
How To Overcome Anxiety And Fear With Women
Dear Speed Seduction® Student,
One of the most common scenarios students present me with is this:
"I do fine if I am introduced to women or already know them. But walking up to a stranger, dead cold, in any situation, scares the bejezus out of me. I just cannot do it. What can I do to resolve this?"
Over the years, I have seen this question or variations on it more times than I can count. If you have felt shy, anxious or even afraid of women, especially beautiful ones, I can assure you that you are far from alone. In fact, I would have to say that fear and shyness around women is so common among men, it's close to being an epidemic.
Now, this "fear factor" can strike guys at different stages. For most, it has to do with the initial approach/ice breaking. For a few guys, approaching is easy, but they freeze up when it comes time to making that serious physical pass. Wherever you may be having your "fear" or "shyness" or "freezing" problem, the good news is that there are powerful solutions to this that can get you going rapidly in the direction you want, without fear, shyness or shame.
I am here to tell you that you can rapidly overcome all of this, just as thousands of guys I have taught have done. I can also assure you that this kind of fear effects guys from all walks of life, from rich to poor, from unathletic dudes to even former U.S Special Forces soldiers. Yes, I mean guys who would have no problem jumping from planes, running through mind fields and dodging bullets have flat out told me, face to face, women scare them silly. The good news, this can all be rapidly overcome with some awareness of how you are producing your shyness and fear and a little retraining of your mind.
Your Fear Is Not A "Thing"
Here is why: "fear" and "shyness" or "hesitation" are not THINGS that happen to you even though it may seem that way.
Remember we spoke in a previous issue about how a woman's "feelings" don't just happen to her by some mysterious magic, but are the result of a recipe or process she runs on herself?
It's the same for any kind of feelings, positive or
negative, that anyone experiences.
Remember this rule for personal change; whatever it is that is troubling you, has a structure and a process, and that it means it can be changed, and even blown apart.
You don't have a bunch of "fear" or "shyness" or
"hesitation" fluid running through your body, like transmission fluid in a car that some mind mechanic has to drain out so you can then be "confident". "Fear" or "shyness" or "hesitation" are internal mental processes that you DO to yourself.
You don't HAVE "shyness". You DO "shyness", usually so
quickly and outside of your awareness of how you are doing it that it seems like something that is just happening to you.
I repeat it again: all humans have their "recipes"-
internal mental processes they do to themselves that produce the final resulting "feelings" of fear, confidence, assurance, calm, etc. So you too have some internal "recipe" that produces your shyness, or hesitation or fear. .
This means that by changing one or more of the elements of your recipe-how you are talking to yourself, what you are visualizing, the flow of energy in your body or your posture and breathing, the resulting "feelings" that come out the other end can be rapidly and radically changed, even if you have suffered from them for a lifetime!
Here's A Method Guaranteed To Work!
We'll examine how to do this in detail, but I want to talk about the most powerful and easily shifted element of any internal "fear" recipe. It's one that most people never even consider, but I will explain not only how to use it to immediately rid yourself of all fear and nervousness around women, but also the science behind it so you will know WHY it works.
I'm talking about the power of your breath. You can look at your breath as the single key ingredient for controlling and designing your state of mind with women. Why is this? Simply because the part of your brain that controls the fight or flight response-that rushing of adrenaline that makes you shake, get short of breath, feel jumpy and want to run from a woman, or just get passive and withdraw-that part of the brain is intimately linked to your breath.
Put simply, you cannot go into the "flight or fight"
response if you learn to control your breath. Control the breath in any situation and you will remain calm; if you've studied any kind of martial arts, you already know this. By controlling your breath and cutting off the fight-flight mechanism, you activate the creative and adaptive layer of your brain, the layer of the brain that is relatively new in terms of evolution.
This layer of your brain can is the same part that helps you think on your feet, adapt to the situation in front of you, remember to try new behaviors, etc. It's also the part of your brain that lets you come up with exactly the right move or exactly the right thing to say an hour after the woman has walked away and you've already calmed down! We want you calmed down, immediately, so you can take advantage of and enjoy the new skills we'll teach you to succeed in every situation! Is this all making sense?
Can you now imagine the power of remaining totally calm, relaxed, confident and secure, in every situation with women?
Now, please remember, this is a practice. Retraining the brain takes some focus, discipline, repetition and time, but it can be done. So do this as a practice, ten minutes a day, every day, for at least the next 2-3 weeks and get ready to enjoy the results you will feel!
A Breath Practice To Destroy All Fear With Women
The first thing I want you to do is take a deep, deep breath in through your nose. Do it right now as you read this. As you breathe in, do it by expanding your rib cage and imagine you are breathing into the center of your chest. Complete the inhale by expanding your belly and pushing it out. Now hold the breath for a just a moment. Begin exhaling, also through your nose. This time, when you exhale, pull your belly toward your spine. Empty your lungs of air and at the end of the exhale, pause for just a
moment. Notice how you can feel that calm moment of silence at the end of the inhale and the end of the exhale.
Ok. Here comes the piece we want to add in. This will really help totally disrupt your fear response. Take another inhale, just like last time, through the nose. This time, as you do, imagine there is a soft line of energy moving down the front of your body and imagine it pooling in the space between your belly button and your pubic bone. In the martial arts, this place is known as the hara, or t'an t'ien. Imagine it swirling there in a clockwise or counter clockwise direction. Either way will work.
When you are finished inhaling, hold the breath for just a moment and feel the calm and silence. Now, when you exhale (through the nose), pull your belly toward your spine and imagine a strong line of energy-an energy of strong will and intent-moving from the small of your back, up your spine and straight out through the top of your head. Feel the strength up your spine and your clarity of mine when you do this strong exhale.
Please note here, when I say "imagine energy" what you ought to do is see some kind of color or feel some kind of feeling-like warmth or heat or tingling, or even a combination of both. It doesn't have to be vivid or super-real; just an idea that this is happening will do.
The keys here: when you inhale, the energy you feel or imagine is soft and relaxed and moves down the front of the body. Almost like a feather brushing the surface of your skin. You imagine it gathering, pooling and swirling in the space between your belly button and pubic pone. When you exhale, the energy going up the spine is inside your body, in your spine, rather than on the surface of the skin. And it is strong AND calm. A relaxed determination. By the way, energetically speaking, this is what women mean when they say they want a guy with "backbone"!!)
They are using a metaphor to describe something that is quite "energetically "real) When you really feel this calm, relaxed, determined feeling, put the fingertip of the first finger of your right hand on the tip of your thumb and touch it gently. As the feelings increase, increase the pressure of the fingertip against the tip of your thumb. You have now created a "calm/confident' anchor for yourself, so when you find yourself in a real world situation with women that's a bit scary, simply do one of the breath cycles (inhale and exhale) as you place your thumb and finger tip together. Increase the pressure of fingertip against thumb to increase the feelings of calm, confident power. I want you to practice this breathing for 10 minutes a day, sitting comfortably or standing.
Ok. Once again, I've overloaded you with information (you should see me at one of my 3 day seminars!). Once again, print this newsletter out, take some time to study it, and re-read it a couple of times again!
Till next issue,
Piece and Peace,
Ross
P.S. Want to wipe out your fear of women in minutes? Check out my new Fear Into Charisma video (with free viewable clips) at
http://www.speedseduction.net/products/rj180.asp
This newsletter, and all of its contents are copyright Ross Jeffries. However this newsletter may be reprinted and re-used in any format, without prior consent, provided all content, including all links, are kept intact, proper credit for authorship is given, and the newsletter is given for free, without charge.
One of the most common scenarios students present me with is this:
"I do fine if I am introduced to women or already know them. But walking up to a stranger, dead cold, in any situation, scares the bejezus out of me. I just cannot do it. What can I do to resolve this?"
Over the years, I have seen this question or variations on it more times than I can count. If you have felt shy, anxious or even afraid of women, especially beautiful ones, I can assure you that you are far from alone. In fact, I would have to say that fear and shyness around women is so common among men, it's close to being an epidemic.
Now, this "fear factor" can strike guys at different stages. For most, it has to do with the initial approach/ice breaking. For a few guys, approaching is easy, but they freeze up when it comes time to making that serious physical pass. Wherever you may be having your "fear" or "shyness" or "freezing" problem, the good news is that there are powerful solutions to this that can get you going rapidly in the direction you want, without fear, shyness or shame.
I am here to tell you that you can rapidly overcome all of this, just as thousands of guys I have taught have done. I can also assure you that this kind of fear effects guys from all walks of life, from rich to poor, from unathletic dudes to even former U.S Special Forces soldiers. Yes, I mean guys who would have no problem jumping from planes, running through mind fields and dodging bullets have flat out told me, face to face, women scare them silly. The good news, this can all be rapidly overcome with some awareness of how you are producing your shyness and fear and a little retraining of your mind.
Your Fear Is Not A "Thing"
Here is why: "fear" and "shyness" or "hesitation" are not THINGS that happen to you even though it may seem that way.
Remember we spoke in a previous issue about how a woman's "feelings" don't just happen to her by some mysterious magic, but are the result of a recipe or process she runs on herself?
It's the same for any kind of feelings, positive or
negative, that anyone experiences.
Remember this rule for personal change; whatever it is that is troubling you, has a structure and a process, and that it means it can be changed, and even blown apart.
You don't have a bunch of "fear" or "shyness" or
"hesitation" fluid running through your body, like transmission fluid in a car that some mind mechanic has to drain out so you can then be "confident". "Fear" or "shyness" or "hesitation" are internal mental processes that you DO to yourself.
You don't HAVE "shyness". You DO "shyness", usually so
quickly and outside of your awareness of how you are doing it that it seems like something that is just happening to you.
I repeat it again: all humans have their "recipes"-
internal mental processes they do to themselves that produce the final resulting "feelings" of fear, confidence, assurance, calm, etc. So you too have some internal "recipe" that produces your shyness, or hesitation or fear. .
This means that by changing one or more of the elements of your recipe-how you are talking to yourself, what you are visualizing, the flow of energy in your body or your posture and breathing, the resulting "feelings" that come out the other end can be rapidly and radically changed, even if you have suffered from them for a lifetime!
Here's A Method Guaranteed To Work!
We'll examine how to do this in detail, but I want to talk about the most powerful and easily shifted element of any internal "fear" recipe. It's one that most people never even consider, but I will explain not only how to use it to immediately rid yourself of all fear and nervousness around women, but also the science behind it so you will know WHY it works.
I'm talking about the power of your breath. You can look at your breath as the single key ingredient for controlling and designing your state of mind with women. Why is this? Simply because the part of your brain that controls the fight or flight response-that rushing of adrenaline that makes you shake, get short of breath, feel jumpy and want to run from a woman, or just get passive and withdraw-that part of the brain is intimately linked to your breath.
Put simply, you cannot go into the "flight or fight"
response if you learn to control your breath. Control the breath in any situation and you will remain calm; if you've studied any kind of martial arts, you already know this. By controlling your breath and cutting off the fight-flight mechanism, you activate the creative and adaptive layer of your brain, the layer of the brain that is relatively new in terms of evolution.
This layer of your brain can is the same part that helps you think on your feet, adapt to the situation in front of you, remember to try new behaviors, etc. It's also the part of your brain that lets you come up with exactly the right move or exactly the right thing to say an hour after the woman has walked away and you've already calmed down! We want you calmed down, immediately, so you can take advantage of and enjoy the new skills we'll teach you to succeed in every situation! Is this all making sense?
Can you now imagine the power of remaining totally calm, relaxed, confident and secure, in every situation with women?
Now, please remember, this is a practice. Retraining the brain takes some focus, discipline, repetition and time, but it can be done. So do this as a practice, ten minutes a day, every day, for at least the next 2-3 weeks and get ready to enjoy the results you will feel!
A Breath Practice To Destroy All Fear With Women
The first thing I want you to do is take a deep, deep breath in through your nose. Do it right now as you read this. As you breathe in, do it by expanding your rib cage and imagine you are breathing into the center of your chest. Complete the inhale by expanding your belly and pushing it out. Now hold the breath for a just a moment. Begin exhaling, also through your nose. This time, when you exhale, pull your belly toward your spine. Empty your lungs of air and at the end of the exhale, pause for just a
moment. Notice how you can feel that calm moment of silence at the end of the inhale and the end of the exhale.
Ok. Here comes the piece we want to add in. This will really help totally disrupt your fear response. Take another inhale, just like last time, through the nose. This time, as you do, imagine there is a soft line of energy moving down the front of your body and imagine it pooling in the space between your belly button and your pubic bone. In the martial arts, this place is known as the hara, or t'an t'ien. Imagine it swirling there in a clockwise or counter clockwise direction. Either way will work.
When you are finished inhaling, hold the breath for just a moment and feel the calm and silence. Now, when you exhale (through the nose), pull your belly toward your spine and imagine a strong line of energy-an energy of strong will and intent-moving from the small of your back, up your spine and straight out through the top of your head. Feel the strength up your spine and your clarity of mine when you do this strong exhale.
Please note here, when I say "imagine energy" what you ought to do is see some kind of color or feel some kind of feeling-like warmth or heat or tingling, or even a combination of both. It doesn't have to be vivid or super-real; just an idea that this is happening will do.
The keys here: when you inhale, the energy you feel or imagine is soft and relaxed and moves down the front of the body. Almost like a feather brushing the surface of your skin. You imagine it gathering, pooling and swirling in the space between your belly button and pubic pone. When you exhale, the energy going up the spine is inside your body, in your spine, rather than on the surface of the skin. And it is strong AND calm. A relaxed determination. By the way, energetically speaking, this is what women mean when they say they want a guy with "backbone"!!)
They are using a metaphor to describe something that is quite "energetically "real) When you really feel this calm, relaxed, determined feeling, put the fingertip of the first finger of your right hand on the tip of your thumb and touch it gently. As the feelings increase, increase the pressure of the fingertip against the tip of your thumb. You have now created a "calm/confident' anchor for yourself, so when you find yourself in a real world situation with women that's a bit scary, simply do one of the breath cycles (inhale and exhale) as you place your thumb and finger tip together. Increase the pressure of fingertip against thumb to increase the feelings of calm, confident power. I want you to practice this breathing for 10 minutes a day, sitting comfortably or standing.
Ok. Once again, I've overloaded you with information (you should see me at one of my 3 day seminars!). Once again, print this newsletter out, take some time to study it, and re-read it a couple of times again!
Till next issue,
Piece and Peace,
Ross
P.S. Want to wipe out your fear of women in minutes? Check out my new Fear Into Charisma video (with free viewable clips) at
http://www.speedseduction.net/products/rj180.asp
This newsletter, and all of its contents are copyright Ross Jeffries. However this newsletter may be reprinted and re-used in any format, without prior consent, provided all content, including all links, are kept intact, proper credit for authorship is given, and the newsletter is given for free, without charge.
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
Three Strikes and you are Out
Guys send me situations or material and ask for my comments. Sometimes they appear to be created and want to know hypnotically what if this happened. Others appear to be from discussion groups and they want another opinion. Evidently a guy went out one day and tried approaching women (I say tried because he failed) on three separate occasions and failed.
The second one seemed most interesting to me. The pick up line from the seduction home study course goes some like this: Excuse me, have you every been told that you are a shining example of genetic perfection. Or Excuse me, I noticed you and I think you are a shining example of genetic perfection.
NOTE: The main rule here is to notice her response and act accordingly. If she respond positively, continue. If she responds negatively, STOP.
So this guy reports that he says: Excuse me, but has somebody ever told you that you are the perfect example of …. Physiological perfection?
Two Comments: “BUT” negates everything in front of it. So he is saying that he is totally non caring if he interrupts, intrudes or not. Second, somebody is different from anybody. Do you know somebody who fixes cars versus do you know anybody who fixes cars. Is he emphasis is on fixing cars or a person who fixes cars: Which? Just a side, Physiological is harder to say and is different than Genetic. One is natural and the other achieved.
She responded: Thanks, but no they haven’t. And then she just walked away.
RED FLAGS: Her “But” is saying NO THANKS. And then she just walked away. NEGATIVE RESPONSE, STOP.
He keeps going: I think that people like you should be let known every once in a while how special they are.
He has now moved to aggressive. When do you hear the phrase “people like you.” It is usually not a compliment. He has passed judgment and has passed the point of observation. Yes, he observed that she was different in his eyes. Now he is insisting that she see it too.
She responded: Thanks And then walked away.
Hold on, this guy still hasn’t gotten the message. He is not letting her response guide his next move.
He now says as he is now following her: What was it that I said that was so threatening to you to cause you to slowly walk away from me as I talk to you.
And then she took off at warp speed.
Of Course, he just became a predator and stalker. He is lucky that she did not go get the cops.
I think this guy has good intentions and is just excited with a new tool that he doesn’t understand. He got a new tuning fork and is using it as a pitch fork. Instead of listening to and feeling the vibrations, he is using it to throw crap against the wall and see if any sticks. I also think his underlying belief based on this and the other two strikes is one of physical power instead of finesse and not realizing the difference.
Dr YJC
The second one seemed most interesting to me. The pick up line from the seduction home study course goes some like this: Excuse me, have you every been told that you are a shining example of genetic perfection. Or Excuse me, I noticed you and I think you are a shining example of genetic perfection.
NOTE: The main rule here is to notice her response and act accordingly. If she respond positively, continue. If she responds negatively, STOP.
So this guy reports that he says: Excuse me, but has somebody ever told you that you are the perfect example of …. Physiological perfection?
Two Comments: “BUT” negates everything in front of it. So he is saying that he is totally non caring if he interrupts, intrudes or not. Second, somebody is different from anybody. Do you know somebody who fixes cars versus do you know anybody who fixes cars. Is he emphasis is on fixing cars or a person who fixes cars: Which? Just a side, Physiological is harder to say and is different than Genetic. One is natural and the other achieved.
She responded: Thanks, but no they haven’t. And then she just walked away.
RED FLAGS: Her “But” is saying NO THANKS. And then she just walked away. NEGATIVE RESPONSE, STOP.
He keeps going: I think that people like you should be let known every once in a while how special they are.
He has now moved to aggressive. When do you hear the phrase “people like you.” It is usually not a compliment. He has passed judgment and has passed the point of observation. Yes, he observed that she was different in his eyes. Now he is insisting that she see it too.
She responded: Thanks And then walked away.
Hold on, this guy still hasn’t gotten the message. He is not letting her response guide his next move.
He now says as he is now following her: What was it that I said that was so threatening to you to cause you to slowly walk away from me as I talk to you.
And then she took off at warp speed.
Of Course, he just became a predator and stalker. He is lucky that she did not go get the cops.
I think this guy has good intentions and is just excited with a new tool that he doesn’t understand. He got a new tuning fork and is using it as a pitch fork. Instead of listening to and feeling the vibrations, he is using it to throw crap against the wall and see if any sticks. I also think his underlying belief based on this and the other two strikes is one of physical power instead of finesse and not realizing the difference.
Dr YJC
Thursday, April 23, 2009
Is She Playing Games?
Here is the situation. Tony is 53 and looks 35 to 40. He works out several nights a week at the local health club. A younger woman shows up and starts working out. She is sharp in Tony’s eyes. He notices that she is a novice and could use some assistance. No one else in the club approaches or offers assistance. So Tony does. Suddenly, she is friendly so appreciative of the work out advice that she offers to take Tony to dinner as a token of her appreciation. He gets to choose the place.
During their workouts she shares that she is not married and never has been. She also states that she has a trust issue and that there was this one man who stalked her. She also stated that she has never been in love.
This goes on for about two weeks. No dinner. However they do seem to know each others schedule for the work outs. Then one night as they are walking across the parking lot to their cars another car shows up with a guy in it. She goes over to talk to the guy as Tony leaves.
The next time they see each other at the club she informs him that he does not have to stay until she leaves. He wasn’t planning to stay and leaves as planned.
Now suddenly, men are coming up to him in the club and wanting to know what is going on. Are they an item or what? Women are approaching him wanting to know the same thing. These are people who have been members for a while as Tony has, however they have never approached him.
The young lady now does not want to workout with Tony. She will take to him. He asked about the guy in the car in the parking lot. Oh, he just a guy I met in the sporting goods store last week.
So what is going on? Is she playing a game or not? There are inconsistencies in her statements. Tony wants to know what to do. First, she is playing some kind of game. Tony is there to work out and should stay focused on that as he always has. I told him to ask more questions as the opportunity arises and expect nothing except to find out her map of the world. For Example ask, “How do you know when you can trust someone” or “How do you identify a stalker” or “I am ready for that dinner and thank you for offering. Can we go to Jason’s Deli” or “How will you know when you fall in Love.”
During their workouts she shares that she is not married and never has been. She also states that she has a trust issue and that there was this one man who stalked her. She also stated that she has never been in love.
This goes on for about two weeks. No dinner. However they do seem to know each others schedule for the work outs. Then one night as they are walking across the parking lot to their cars another car shows up with a guy in it. She goes over to talk to the guy as Tony leaves.
The next time they see each other at the club she informs him that he does not have to stay until she leaves. He wasn’t planning to stay and leaves as planned.
Now suddenly, men are coming up to him in the club and wanting to know what is going on. Are they an item or what? Women are approaching him wanting to know the same thing. These are people who have been members for a while as Tony has, however they have never approached him.
The young lady now does not want to workout with Tony. She will take to him. He asked about the guy in the car in the parking lot. Oh, he just a guy I met in the sporting goods store last week.
So what is going on? Is she playing a game or not? There are inconsistencies in her statements. Tony wants to know what to do. First, she is playing some kind of game. Tony is there to work out and should stay focused on that as he always has. I told him to ask more questions as the opportunity arises and expect nothing except to find out her map of the world. For Example ask, “How do you know when you can trust someone” or “How do you identify a stalker” or “I am ready for that dinner and thank you for offering. Can we go to Jason’s Deli” or “How will you know when you fall in Love.”
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
Phone Number Leads to Failure?
There seems to be a rash of partial successes these days. I have had several guys call complaining about getting phone numbers and NO RESULTS. Well, they got a result; just not the one they wanted or expected. They have varied. One gentleman ran a few patterns; she seemed to respond from his point of view and asked for his phone number. He was ecstatic and thought he was on his way. She never called.
Another young man has had a lot of success IN HIS VIEW because he never got anywhere before and now he is getting lots of phone numbers. However, when he calls, they are ALL turning out to be flakes again in his view. They will not talk to him and are always to busy to talk.
Let’s talk about social programming first. In the south, most of the young ladies are brought up to be non-confrontational; that is to be very polite. They are told that even if they do not like the male who is approaching to be polite and get rid of him quickly by GIVIING HIM A PHONE NUMBER. They have no intention of talking with you. They believe that after one or two calls you will stop calling and they have gotten rid of you without hurting your feelings or being confrontational (saying they do not like you) or (you are not their type) or (etc).
Now listen up, no matter what course you are studying or what guru you like to think is right for you, there is something missing. It called calibration and/or test closing. You think she is responding strongly and then she flakes. IT IS VERY SIMPLE, FRIENDS. SHE DOES NOT RESPOND THE WAY YOU WANT OR EXPECT BECAUSE “IT IS NOT IMPORTANT ENOUGH TO HER (not important enough to her). You think it is and she does not. Now whose fault is that.
There are lots of ways to calibrate or test. Start by asking questions like: Are you enjoying this conversation as much as you seem to me.
In the end you must get confirmation. One traditional suggestion is to follow up the agreement to talk or meet again with this question: “How do I know that you will call” or “How do I know that you will be available to talk and we will continue” These short retorts may sound good on the surface. BUT stop and think about it. You may be coming off as uncertain and asking for reassurance. You may be coming off as whiney and needy (depending on your voice and energy).
Here is my suggestion. You ask the female. “I’m curious, How do YOU know that YOU will call”, “I’m curious, How do YOU know that YOU will answer and be ready to continue…”
This way you are asking for HER PROCESS as to what makes things important to her. If she does not respond or can’t respond, then you know you have more to do with her to make yourself MORE IMPORTANT with her.
Of course ladies, the exact same thing is true when you are dealing with what you perceive as flaky guys.
Dr YJC
Another young man has had a lot of success IN HIS VIEW because he never got anywhere before and now he is getting lots of phone numbers. However, when he calls, they are ALL turning out to be flakes again in his view. They will not talk to him and are always to busy to talk.
Let’s talk about social programming first. In the south, most of the young ladies are brought up to be non-confrontational; that is to be very polite. They are told that even if they do not like the male who is approaching to be polite and get rid of him quickly by GIVIING HIM A PHONE NUMBER. They have no intention of talking with you. They believe that after one or two calls you will stop calling and they have gotten rid of you without hurting your feelings or being confrontational (saying they do not like you) or (you are not their type) or (etc).
Now listen up, no matter what course you are studying or what guru you like to think is right for you, there is something missing. It called calibration and/or test closing. You think she is responding strongly and then she flakes. IT IS VERY SIMPLE, FRIENDS. SHE DOES NOT RESPOND THE WAY YOU WANT OR EXPECT BECAUSE “IT IS NOT IMPORTANT ENOUGH TO HER (not important enough to her). You think it is and she does not. Now whose fault is that.
There are lots of ways to calibrate or test. Start by asking questions like: Are you enjoying this conversation as much as you seem to me.
In the end you must get confirmation. One traditional suggestion is to follow up the agreement to talk or meet again with this question: “How do I know that you will call” or “How do I know that you will be available to talk and we will continue” These short retorts may sound good on the surface. BUT stop and think about it. You may be coming off as uncertain and asking for reassurance. You may be coming off as whiney and needy (depending on your voice and energy).
Here is my suggestion. You ask the female. “I’m curious, How do YOU know that YOU will call”, “I’m curious, How do YOU know that YOU will answer and be ready to continue…”
This way you are asking for HER PROCESS as to what makes things important to her. If she does not respond or can’t respond, then you know you have more to do with her to make yourself MORE IMPORTANT with her.
Of course ladies, the exact same thing is true when you are dealing with what you perceive as flaky guys.
Dr YJC
Friday, April 17, 2009
If You Were Like Me What Would You Be Doing?
If a teenage child ask you, "What are you doing." Just answer, "If you were like me what would you be doing?
Being Responsible, being productive, being caring. Are You Starting? You can be Too, It's easy."
Then after watching their head spin say, "What are you fixing for Supper"
Dr YJC
Being Responsible, being productive, being caring. Are You Starting? You can be Too, It's easy."
Then after watching their head spin say, "What are you fixing for Supper"
Dr YJC
Friday, April 10, 2009
Scott Asks, What Do You Really Want?
Dear Tom,
What do you really want?
Most people never know what they really want in life.
You ask them and they answer "I want hot women" or "I want to be rich" almost like it's a joke.
Thing is, it's not a joke at all. Think about the inherent natural language processing taking place.
The people who take it that way are the passive peasants.
Passive thinking is a lower level of thinking.
Einstein said "The world we have made, as a result of the level of thinking we have done thus far, creates problems we cannot solve at the same level of thinking at which we created them."
Get it?
Your world, right now, was created at a certain level of thinking. You cannot change it at the same level of thinking!
You're going to have to think differently...
...like a Warrior!
Are warriors passive thinkers?
Hell, no!
Can warriors be so highly effective that success is almost easy?
Absolutely!
The key is in Knowing.
If YOU KNOW what YOU REALLY WANT in THIS life, find me to the right and I'll show you how to GET WHAT YOU WANT!
Fair enough?
Scott
What do you really want?
Most people never know what they really want in life.
You ask them and they answer "I want hot women" or "I want to be rich" almost like it's a joke.
Thing is, it's not a joke at all. Think about the inherent natural language processing taking place.
The people who take it that way are the passive peasants.
Passive thinking is a lower level of thinking.
Einstein said "The world we have made, as a result of the level of thinking we have done thus far, creates problems we cannot solve at the same level of thinking at which we created them."
Get it?
Your world, right now, was created at a certain level of thinking. You cannot change it at the same level of thinking!
You're going to have to think differently...
...like a Warrior!
Are warriors passive thinkers?
Hell, no!
Can warriors be so highly effective that success is almost easy?
Absolutely!
The key is in Knowing.
If YOU KNOW what YOU REALLY WANT in THIS life, find me to the right and I'll show you how to GET WHAT YOU WANT!
Fair enough?
Scott
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